-dedicated to ren and livvy for their birthdays! happy belated birthday, you guys. i love you to death. :)

[disclaimed]

blow the candles out, looks like a solo tonight

[all the games you played, the promises you made.

couldn't finish what you started, only darkness still remains.]

as i watched her walk down the hallway towards the door of her apartment, it didn't look like anything was out of the ordinary.

yes, if i had looked a bit closer, i would've realized that there was a little bit of a drag in her step, and her hair was a little more frizzy than she would've usually allowed, and that one of her heels was broken so she was partially limping.

but i had no particular reason to worry, so after assuring myself that she was at least physically safe and healthy, and ignoring the disappointed feeling deep in my stomach, i moved away from the peephole of my door before she somehow (maybe with those magical powers that i sometimes suspect that she has) realizes that i had been spying on her.

just after i had settled myself down on my worn out leather couch and had turned on the television for another night of watching 'full house' reruns (yes, i know how gay that sounds, but hey, those kids are pretty damn funny!), i heard a timid knock on my door. curious and surprised, i hurried toward the messily painted wooden door. i somewhat roughly pulled open the door, only to have a pile of fiery red hair collapse onto my cheaply carpeted floors.

shocked, i buried my many questions for later, and gently picked up the sobbing girl bridal style before setting her down on the earlier mentioned old couch. her bright hair and emerald green eyes contrasted greatly with the beige of the leather, and i took a second to drink her in with my eyes. i had never really looked at her from this close up, and i liked what i saw (yes i know that sounds cliché, but whatever). then i realized that i should probably pay more attention to why she was crying, instead of how beautiful she looked even though she was crying.

so like the complete moron that i am, i asked her 'what's wrong, dylan? what happened?' which only resulted in her letting out a gut-wrenching sob. seeing as talking probably wouldn't help her, i sat down on the couch next to her trembling body and pulled her into my lap, instinctively tucking her head into the crook of my neck. she tugged on the fabric of my american eagle tee and soaked through the cloth with her salty tears. i desperately tried to soothe her, muttering sweet 'it'll be okay's and 'whatever happened is over's to her while rhythmically rubbing circles on her back.

after a while, her loud cries turned into soft sniffles and she just lay there in my arms, both of us unwilling to move from our current position.

'so do you really want to know what happened?' she finally asked, turning her tear-streaked face upwards to look into my eyes.

giving her what i hoped was an easygoing grin (or maybe i just ended up looking retarded, who knows?) i replied with a simple 'yeah, so i can go beat up whoever hurt you.'

she giggled then, and i was hooked. her laugh was so beautiful, like the chiming of church bells, i was sure i would never meet someone like her who i would be content to just listen to her laugh the entire day.

'right. well. um...' she gave me a sheepish smile. 'so you know i went out on a date tonight, right?' i gave a curt nod, disliking the fact that she had been on a date with some douchebag who had hurt her.

'it was with kemp hurley, remember him from briarwood?' stopping myself from letting out a pissed off groan at his name, i nodded again. yeah, i remembered that asshole i had called my best friend - until he slept with the first serious girlfriend i had ever had.

'we have been going out for about three months now. i'd never thought he would've been able to settle down with anyone, and was honored when he started to with me. at least i thought he had.' tears started welling up in her green orbs again, so i gave her shoulder a tight squeeze of reassurance.

'tonight was the night i found out that he had been seeing girls on the side the entire time. actually, not really seeing. just sleeping with. i was just fifteen minutes early, and i let myself into his townhouse to surprise him. i opened the door to his room, all excited for our date, and i found him fucking alicia rivera. and the worst part is, even after he saw i was standing there, he didn't stop and even try to apologize.' she broke out into sobs again but managed to choke out a couple more sentences, 'i was so naive to think he actually cared for me. why would anyone love me? i'm just a fat unemployed bitch.'

my heart clenched in pain as i heard her blame herself for kemp's wrongs. 'no, dylan. listen to me,' i tilted her chin up so she was forced to look directly into my eyes. 'you. are. beautiful. you are sexy and gorgeous and bewitching and no asshole can take that from you. you are nowhere near fat by anyone's standards and you are one of the nicest people i know.' she managed a weak smile at my words, but silent tears still flowed down her cheeks.

i hugged her impossibly closer to me, trying to lend her my strength and warmth so she would feel better. it physically hurt me to see her so vulnerable and destroyed. eventually her choked sobs turned into soft snoring (which i found absolutely adorable), and i delicately carried her into my room. i laid my sleeping beauty down on my bed, tucked my cheap comforter around her unconscious body, and gave her forehead a gentle chaste kiss. i grabbed a pillow from beside her and headed back to the couch. i turned on the tv to a random channel, but i wasn't really paying attention. i was thinking about what i would give to have a shot at a relationship with dylan. i would treat her like she was a princess, i would never break her heart, and i would try my very best to make her happy, but why couldn't she see that? in her eyes, i was just her nice (maybe sort of cute) neighbor who has no life and might be gay due to lack of girlfriends. and honestly, i think that's all i'll ever be to her.

a/n: gah you guys can hunt me down with pitchforks. i'm an awful friend. not only is this practically light years late, but i am so awful that i only wrote one fic for both of your birthdays. D: you guys deserve so much better and i'm really sorry. i actually wasn't going to post this until later, but then my other oneshot's reviews made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside, so i finished writing this. hope it's not too bad. xD