Warning: Description of naked bodies, Slash/Yaoi and Femslash/Yuri implemented!

Disclaimer: I do not own anything or anyone.
Also, this is parody; do not take it too seriously.

Chapter one: Rekka no Ken (requested by JoaquinHawke)

Girly giggles could be heard coming from a small "lake" inside a forest, in the middle of trees. A group of half-naked girls were bathing and playing in the water. Said water was actually a natural hot spring and these people were member of the liberation army.

After winning a tough battle against Nergal, Eliwood's army has found a nice natural spring in the isle and has decoded to enjoy it a little before going back in Lycia, Etruia or Ilia.

Fortunately, they found two springs, the second one not that far, but not that close either from the first one. The men among the army has decided to bath in the last one, happy that they didn't have to wait for the women to go first and only go later.

Talking about which, a green-haired boy in his 20s, who like the others was naked and half submerged into the water, sighed as he placed an elbow on the rock encircling the bath, resting his cheek on his hand. "Why?" He sighed loudly. "Why did this have to happen?"

The red-haired man beside him sighed, already knowing what his friend had in mind. "Sain, don't you ever think of anything else but women?"

"But Kent," Said whimmed as he stood up, accidentally showing his 'sword' at the other knight who instantly looked away, "the girls are all playing at the other side of this forest! Don't you want to have a little peek at what kind of game they might be playing or something."

A certain purple-haired man sitting from across them sighed. "These knight of Caelin are the worst..." The green-haired boy beside him however wasn't saying a word and Marcus elbowed him until he turned to the older man. "Lowen, may I know why were you passing out? A knigh should always be very attentive of their surrounding."

"Y-yes, general!" Lowen stood up firm and saluted. "Sorry about that!"

Just as Marcus was about to let it pass, his eyes caught sign of something not very knight-like from the younger boy. "Lowen! What in the earth were you thinking about? This is not, I say not supposed to be a knight's behavior." He said sternly.

That earned a moment of pause from the young boy as he inspected himself until his eyes caught sign of a certain part of his body that was being too lively. "T-this is not what you think it is. It is just...just..."

"Lowen!" Marcus said sternly.

"Y-yes!" Lowen stood still. His eyes however were not focused on the older man as they always occasionally turned at the side.

Curious as what has distracted his protegee, Marcus turned to his left to see Eliwood and Harken washing each other's back atop a rock, of course half-naked as only a small towel was covering the red-head's thighs. The other knight was naked like the day he was born.

The older Knight sighed. "Oh my god... Lowen!"

"Y-yes...?"

"Just one question... are you gay?"

"No!" The response came without a second of hesitation. That was until he was pushed from behind by a certain brown-haired boy.

The two Pheraean boys fell face first into the water, Marcus deciding he got enough, stood up and walked to his best buddy, namely Merlinus to talk about old men stuffs.

The brown-haired boy was the first who stood up and quickly offered a hand to help the green-haired cavalier. "Sorry, Lowen! I didn't watch where I was stepping." Lowen accepted the offer and stood up, until he felt Wil falling in his direction once again as said boy was pushed forward by a certain Sacaean boy. Wil and Lowen fell into the water that could reach their knees if standing and almost drowned. Luckily, the brown-haired archer quickly manager to get out before it was too late. "Rath!" He angrily glared at the young nomad who was just giving an 'innocent' look.

"What is it, archer number 3?"

"Grrr!" Said archer ran in his direction, the idea of tackling Rath in his mind. "You did it again! You're still teasing me!"

The Sacaean nomad on the other hand just had a lopsided smile. He didn't want to admit it but he was really enjoying that moment. He was not used to be around too many people or to play in the water like this but was finding it funny, even letting himself laugh slightly from times to times as Wil tripped over a soap and was struggling in the water while complaining that he got a cramp. 'I guess... I am enjoying myself.'

"Hey, Rath! Stop smiling like an idiot and please give me a hand, will you?"

"Yeah!" The nomad has decided to finally help his friend and lifted him bridal style out of the water. "Are you all right, princess?"

"W-wha... wha..." Wil was left speechless from that remark.

Meanwhile, a certain Sacaean swordsman dropped his soap as he overhead the conversation. Guy looked in horror as his 'buddy' was gently placing the Pheraean archer on his feet. "R-Rath... a-are you seriou? Y-you are really out of character..."

"Who cares?" A young boy with dark blonde hair wrapped his arms around the younger swordsman and pulled him closer. "We defeated Nergal and avoided another Scouring without loosing anyone so we can all relax a little."

"M-Matt... W-what are you doing?" The younger boy's face turned bright red. "T-this is too shameless!"

"What are you talking about?" Matthew cooed at his lover's ear. "Remember! We are a couple so it's allowed~"

A vein popped on Guy's head. "What the hell? I just lost a bet against you where the looser had to do a favor for the winner. Asking me out was totally unfair!"

"But you accepted~"

"That's because I had no other choice!" The green-haired boy retorted, his face matching the color of his blood. "A Sacaean never back on his words. I accepted to do anything you say if you won so..." He mumbled the rest while averting his eyes cutely.

"Guy, you're so cute~" The thief hugged him even tighter while squealing like Serra and Florina when they were surprised by Sophia.

"Gross!" Marcus averted his eyes.

At the other side of the bath, Harken, Eliwood, Hector and Oswin were just talking about their projects. "So," the Ostian Knight started, "what are you going to do now that everything is settled?"

"Bah!" Hector just closed his eyes as he laid on the rock, both hands under his head. "I'm just going to return to Ostia and watch as my brother continue to rule. Nothing special." He then eyed at his red-head friend. "What about you, Eliwood? I heard that Ninian has rejected your confession..."

Eliwood let go of a sigh as he closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling of someone washing his back. "She told me she was gay and only saw me as a friend. At least, now I am sure." He then opened his eyes and eyed back at the blue-haired boy. "I will just go back to Pherae and assist Mother."

The blonde Knight paused an instant before resuming. "If it is okay, may I return back with you? I know I have failed as a Knight but I still want to do my best and erase the shameful defeat we had while loosing Lord Elbert."

"Of course!" Eliwood happily said. "Also, on side note, I heard that Farina has rejected you as well, Hector."

The young Knight nodded. "Yeah! It looks like everyone in this army are gay."

Harken looked down at these words. "Even Isadora said she found a nice and kind woman who has comforted her enough and forgot about me."

"Wait!" Erk and Cannas, who happened to be overheating their discussion couldn't help but to get it. "Please don't tell me..." The young mage shook his head like a madman. "N-no way! No way! Absolutely no way! What will Lord Pent say?"

The shaman was calmer than the purple-haired boy but was still in panic.,"But what about Klein? Lord Pent will be totally broken."

"What are you talking about?" A certain silver-haired man walked in their direction, only a towel wrapped around his waist. "Why should I be 'broken'? Did I miss anything?"

The response came in a huge laugher party by Bartre and Hector.,The fighter who was as nude as a worm proudly walked in their direction. "No! Lady Isadora is not Lady Louise's mistress."

"Wait!" Pent turned to the warrior. "Lady Louise and Lady Isadora?" He chuckled. "I've heard rumors going on but Lady Louise has affirmed it's not true and I believe in her."

"T-then..." Erk turned to the Ostian heir who was starting to calm down.

Hector just grinned. "Believe it or not but Isadora has found comfort with..." everyone held their breath. Even Sain, Kent and Dorcas were turning their attention to the blue-haired boy. "...with...with..." Cannas gulped loudly. "...with... Fiora."

There was a brief moment of silence until everyone screamed at the same time. "Say whaaaat!"

"Like I said, Isadora is going out with Fiora, Karla and Farina is a thing, Lyn x Florina is as obvious as daylight, Nino x Rebecca too is a thing."

"Wait!" Erk, Jaffar and Dark screamed in fear. "Rebecca x Nino?"

"Yes!" Matthew was the one to answer. "They confessed to each others and started to go out."

There was one...two...three seconds of silence until...

"Waaaaaa! Nooooo!" Several screams could be heard.

"Hein?" A certain orchid-haired girl lifted her head as something caught her ears. "Did you hear that?"

"Hear what?" A girl with long green hair, who was sitting beside her tilted her head.

Florina shook her head as she saw the smile on her girlfriend's face. "It's nothing... It must have been my imagination." And the two of them returned back their attention to the spectacle happening in front of them. Lyn's hand slightly moved closer to the Pegasus knight's and intertwined their fingers. "L-Lyn..." The orchid-haired girl's cheek turned pink as the taller girl moved closer so they were shoulder against shoulder.

"We will always be together, right?"

Florina nodded as she closed her eyes and rested her head on the Sacaean girl's shoulder. "And nothing will ever separate us..."

Few soft giggles could be heard as Fiora and Farina smiled at their little sister. "I am so happy for our little Florina... She is a woman, now."

"Yeah!" The younger sister nodded as she wrapped her left arm around Karla's waist. "But we sure are lucky~" She turned at the side to give a kiss at the gray haired woman's cheek, earning a giggle from the swordswoman. "This is the best pay I ever had in my life."

"Yeah!" Fiora too felt a pair of nice arm getting wrapped around her neck and not long after, a pair of soft 'airbags' got pressed against her back. "It's all thanks to you that I have more hope in love, Fiora..." The blue-haired woman whispered at the teal-haired girl's ear. "Thank you for always teaching me and staying by my side."

Fiora smiled as she placed a hand over Isadora's. "But of course! That's what lovers are supposed to do~"

At the other side of the bath, Louise and Priscilla were just smiling at these three sisters and their girlfriends. "Ah; youth!" The blonde chuckled, almost accidentally letting her towel fall. "Oops!"

Serra who just happened to be turning in their direction at the very moment felt anger building inside her as she saw these two 'goddesses' sitting there and chatting. "Are they bragging?" She turned at her own chest only to realize how flat she was conpared to the noble lady of Reglay and Cornwell. "This is so unfair!" She looked down, feeling defeated.

A shy hand got placed on her shoulder and the cleric lifted her head to meet with a pair of teal eyes. "C-can I talk to you for a second?" Ninian shyly asked while fidgeting with the towel covering her body. "Th-The truth is that... I..."

"No need so say anything!" The pinkette starting to cry. "You are bustier than me!" She sobbed. "10 years praying St. Elimine but still flat. Everyone in this army has nice assets. Even Nino is bustier than me..."

"S-Serra..." The dancer felt sad for the healer and felt a sharp pain on her chest. She was hesitant to continue with what she wanted to say and thought about giving up but then say Rebecca and Nino who were motioning her to go ahead. Ninian sighed as she knew these two are going to bug her for years if she doesn't talk to Serra at that time. "S-Serra... T-the truth is that I was thinking about it for a while now..."

The pinkette stopped her sobs as she watched the half-dragon girl fidgeting shyly while trying to say something.

"Y-you are really someone I admire; always full of energy, sociable and full of confidence. It's thanks to you that I managed to get confidence in myself..." She took a deep breath. "T-the truth is that I fell in love with you!"

There was a moment of awkward silence as the two girl just looked at each others.

Ninian looked down. "When I was captured back by Nergal, I couldn't think of anything but of Lord Eliwood and you. Since I consider Lord Eliwood like a brother and really admire you, that was what allowed me to go 'til the end without giving up." She closed her eyes. "I know that it's not normal since we're both girls and since I'm half-dragon but..." She bowed her head. "Please go out with me!"

There was a moment of silence as Ninian was on verge of crying. Serra was dumbfooled at the sudden confession.

'This is bad... I am going to get rejected...'

Much to her surprise, the cleric started to giggle and lifted her head with her right hand. What the young dragon saw was the most beautiful face she has ever seen, lips curled into a confidient smile. "Thank you, Ninian! You are actually the first person who confessed so honestly to me."

"Serra..."

The pinkette quickly reverted into her other self. "I-I meant... Of course I am beautiful so of course you would fall in my charm!"

"T-then..."

The response came as Serra wrapped the dancer in her arms, allowing her lips to capture Ninian's into a tender kiss. Rebecca and Nino high-fived each others as they saw that and started to cheer. "Yay! We did it!"

omake

"Are you sure we are walking the right direction?" Lucius asked.

Four men were walking the woods for hours but were still unable to find the exit.

They stopped in front of an intersection and the bald man thought before pointing a random direction. "This way!"

Raven sighed as he just followed. "This... is the worst day I ever had."

Renault placed a hand on the red-head's shoulder and turned to the bald Knight. "Sir Wallace, are you sure we haven't passed by this part yet?"

There was no response as the four of the continued until they say a shadowy figure making weird noises. "W-what was that?" The young monk jumped in fear as the sound became scarier by each passing second. Not ling after, the shadow became scarier and started talking with a very weird voice. Lucius couldn't take it anymore and ran back a random direction. "Aaaaa!" He screamed like a girl.

Raven, Renault and Wallace too ran after him, screaming like...men...

As the shadow came closer, it was revealed to be Geitz, Karel, Heath, Vaida and Legault eating lot of meat. "Hein? I swore I heard someone coming from that direction." The warrior commented.

"Mpff..." Vaida scoffed as she dropped the remain bones and held her spear. "Who cares? I am still hungry so follow me!" She started to run further into the woods and was soon followed by the others. "Gotta admit the beasts from this island are very tasty~"