Halloween is Too Cool!
(Note: This story happens after the Majin Buu Saga but before CM. Actually, if you want to be specific, it happens about halfway there, so Goten and Trunks are teenagers and Gohan is probably just about finishing college. Marron's a little younger then Goten and Trunks, Bra's still a little girl, yadda yadda you should be able to figure out the rest of the ages. BTW, I never mentioned that CM was somewhat Alternate Universe, which is why the ages are somewhat screwed up. Ok, enough yakking, to the fic!)
Warning: This fic contains gratudious use of making Goku stupid for the sake of comedy.
Goku was bored. He didn't feel like training, Vegeta and all his possible sparring partners were off doing other things, and he had conviently forgotten about Goten and Trunks's giant TV system that got channels from other galaxies. So he was doing the only things he could think of: eating and looking at calendars. However, he soon exhausted the stores of food, so he decided to combine his two tasks and began eating the calendars.
"Mmmmpphh, yum…hey, a Gary Larson calendar…" Goku said as he picked up a book sized calendar filled with the artist of The Far Side's cartoons and began flipping through it.
"I don't get it…I don't get it…I don't get it…I don't get it…I don't get…oh, to hell with it." Goku muttered and ate the calendar with one bite. He continued to munch down the date books until he heard a door open.
"Ok boys, come with me." Chi Chi, leading in the bodybuilders she had hired to carry in her weekly grocery purchases. However, she promptly stopped when she came to her husband sitting at the tables eating the calendars.
"……………..GOKU!!!!!!!!!!!!" Chi Chi screamed, making windows rattle twenty blocks away. She spun on her heel to the bodybuilders all holding huge bags of food.
"Go wait in the living room!"
"But Madam, these bags are heavy…"
"NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Chi Chi roared in the way only she could. The body builders promtly broke the world record for Speed Bodybuilders Can Reach When Running Away from a Furious Chi Chi while Laid Down with Many Many Groceries. Chi Chi spun around again.
"GOKU! What are you doing!?!!?!!?!!?!!?!!?!!?!!?!!?!!"
"Ummmmmmm…getting my daily intake of roughage and essential inks?" Goku asked sheepishly, holding a 1964 calendar with a big bite mark out of it.
"ARRGGHHH! How many times have I told you not to start eating my calendar collection?!?" Chi Chi yelled.
"Um…never. Since when have you had a calendar collection?"
WHAM! Chi Chi bashed Goku over the head with her magical warping frying pan.
"Never question the author's convient plot devices!" Chi Chi snapped. Suddenly there was a loud crashing noise from elsewhere in the Son house.
"Um, Madam, the wall in the living room just fell down!" said one of the bodybuilders.
"Oh great, that's the fourth one this week! I am getting sick of those repairmen…nani?" Chi Chi when she noticed that Goku was still sitting there. "Why didn't you fall over like you always do?"
"I was wearing my frying pan-proof vest!" Goku replied, looking quite pleased with himself. Chi Chi stared at her husband for a second, then slapped her face.
"You baka! I hit you over the HEAD!"
Goku stared for a second before his eyes showed that he got it.
"Oh yeah. Damn." Goku said, and promptly fell over in pain. Chi Chi sighed.
"Ok Goku, I've gotta put the food away. Vamoose!" Chi Chi said, pointing for Goku to get out of the kitchen. Goku promptly did so, wishing he had ordered a helmet catalogue to go along with his vest catalogue.
"Great, now what am I going to do?' Goku said.
Then his stomach growled omniously.
"Oh no." Goku said, and then broke the speed record for Goku Running to the Bathroom.
Meanwhile, Goten and Trunks walked along the hallway, school finally out and them quite happy about it.
"So what are you gonna dress up as for Halloween this year, Trunks?" Goten said.
"I dunno yet. You?"
"A ghost!"
"WHAT? Goten, you've been one of those for the past eight halloweens! Why are you always a stupid ghost?"
"It's convient." Goten replied, shrugging. Trunks facevaulted.
"You really are a Son, you know that?" Trunks said. Goten grinned goofily.
"Hey Trunks and Goten!" Marron said, as she bounced up to the son of her father's best friend and the son of his father's not so favorite saiya-jin. Trunks rolled his eyes as the smiling, blonde pig-tailed daughter of Krillian joined him and his friend as they walked along the school hallways.
"Marron, I like you and all, but I really don't like to be seen in the hallway with you, it might give Debra the wrong idea." Trunks said, sure that in his teenage insecurities that any woman coming within ten miles of him might make Debra think he was taken, and Trunks did not want that. He wanted Debra.
"Oh lighten up Trunks! Our dads are all friends, why can't we be?" Marron chirped. Trunks acted like her voice tone was like nails across a chalkboard.
"Well Marron, I wouldn't exactly call Vegeta and Krillian friends…more like "barely tolerant of each other's right to live" aquintances..." Goten said, looking around to see if anyone was looking at the fact that Marron was with them.
"Oh who cares. That doesn't mean we can't be friends? Hey, what are you doing for Halloween?" Marron chirped again. Trunks rolled his eyes again.
"Marron, I mean this in the nicest possible way, but if you don't go away right now, I'm going to start singing disgusting songs again!"
Marron paused.
"Oh Trunks, don't be silly! You used to do that when we were kids! You sang so many songs that you can't possibly have any more. Besides, I'm grown up now, you silly immature songs can't gross me out anymore."
Trunks's eyes twinkled.
"Oh yeah Marron? Well I might no longer have any more songs about snot and slug slime, but I do have my new teenage knowledge and the ability to use it to compose gems like this!" Trunks said, and began to sing in a semi-hoedown tune.
(Ed's Note: This was actually an old tune that was sung around one of my schools for a while. I happened to have it pop into my head yesterday. If you're eating anything I suggest you stop)
Trunks: Old Mcdonald sat on a fence,
Picking his balls with a monkey wrench!
Wrench got hot, and burned his balls!
And he pissed all over his overalls!
Went to the doctor, doctor said
"Sorry sir, your balls are dead!"
"When I die, bury me,
Hang my balls on a cheery tree!
When they're ripe, go take a bite!
Don't blame me if you barf all night!"
Trunks finished with a florish, and look at Marron's now green face.
A second later, Marron bolted for the bathroom, breaking Goku's recently set speed record in the process. There was some scattered applause from the various male students who found that sort of thing amusing, and Trunks bowed.
"Trunks, that was rather mean. You know Marron has a weak stomach. I mean, she practically faints at the sight of blood." Goten said.
"Ohhhhhh, Goten. Do I sense a crush?" Trunks taunted. Goten quickly scrambled to regain such a grave insult to his high-school pride.
"Marron and I? Ha! It would never happen!"
"Admit it! You love her! You wanna marry her and have babies with her!" Trunks taunted, dancing away from Goten. Goten growled.
"I do not! I'll never have anything to do with her! Anything!" Goten yelled back, as he chased Trunks down the hallway and out the door.
Goku sighed with relief as he came out of the bathroom.
"DO NOT go in there! Whew!" Goku said, doing his best Jim Carrey impression, before realized there was no one around.
"D'OH! And unlike him it was true too." Goku muttered, as he walked down the hallway. Passing by Goten's room, he happened to notice the gigantic TV in Goten's room, which he had conviently forgotten until now.
"Ah, I know. I'll watch some television!…Oh yeah, I promised Chi Chi and the others that I wouldn't watch TV because I kept picking up silly catchphrases, dressing up in costumes, and teleporting around yelling them at various people. Geez, Vegeta's still in therapy and…
(STOP THE FIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
"Hey, who the hell are you?" said Ash the Wanderer as the three men in suits came into his room.
"Mr Mersereau, I represent the estate of Nik Nak. You are to cease this unauthorized referencing of his work immediately!" The head lawyer said, as his burly comrades towered over Ash.
"Oh come on guys, it's just a silly story." Ash protested.
"And it's heading for a very serious lawsuit! You made a big mistake Eric." The head lawyer said with great relish in his attempted destruction of Ash's work. Ash's eyes narrowed as a spark of rage came into his eyes.
"So did you. You made an ex-Venta student mad."
The head lawyer only got a chance to gasp as Ash sent a darting blow into his trachea. One of the goons went for Ash, only to receive a powerful kick to his testicles and then a Stone Cold Stunner. The remaining goon thought differently and tried to flee, but Ash picked up his handy rubber chicken and hurled it at the goon, knocking him for a loop. As the goon yelled and fell down the stairs, Ash shoved the other two lawyers out of his room with his feet and locked the door.
"As Skinner said it, copyright expired." Ash said, dragging a hand through his hair, and sat back down to continue writing.
(Resume the fic!!!!!!!!!!)
"…unless the porcupines get through to save the admiral." Goku said, finishing the long narrative that Ash would have typed, but failed to get a chance to due to Nik Nak.
"Well, I may as well…
(STOP THE FIC AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!)
"Hey, I did not sent those goons after you! You did it to be funny!" Nik Nak protested from wherever he was, and by the magic power of authoring, Ash heard him.
"Ok, ok, whatever. I'm not letting Goku get cut off again!" Ash said, and went back to typing.
(Resume the fic again!!!!!!!!)
"…watch some television." Goku said, and picked up the remote and began channel surfing.
"Boring…boring…seen it…lame…FRENCH…hey, what's this?" Goku said, as he came to the TNN network and the show that was playing, Monday Night Raw.
"Hey, this looks interesting." Goku said, and proceeded to watch the wrestling. As the cast of characters floated across his screen, Goku's attention was drawn to two particular wrestlers.
"Oh…I can't do any more dressup…but how can I NOT…?" Goku whined.
Then the idea hit him.
"OW! That hurt!" Goku said.
("You idiot! That means you had the idea occur to you, not that it dealt you a physical blow!")
"Oh yeah. Sorry Ash." Goku said as he grinned sheepishly. "Do you have any ideas on how I can do what I want to do, though?"
("Why not do it at Bulma's Halloween party in a few days?")
"Halloween party? Bulma isn't having a Halloween party…" Goku said as he searched for a certain bit of knowledge and found it lacking.
("She is now!")
"Oh, ok. Cool! Now all I need are some clothes, some hair spray, and someone to help me! I know, I'll go ask Gohan! He used to love to dress up on Halloween! And he'll be the perfect partner!" Goku said, as he put two fingers to his forehead and teleported away.
Meanwhile, Goten and Trunks had snuck into the back of a magazine store and were busy oogling every single adult magazine they could find.
"Ohhhhhh…forget Debra…so tasty…wanna touch the hinney…" Trunks said as he drooled over a certain centerfold. Goten was digging through another pile of magazines when he came across one that caught his eye.
"Hey Trunks!"
"Go away. Mentally having this girl feed me strawberries with whipped cream before I…" Trunks said in a dreamy state, before Goten snapped him out of it by whacking him with the rolled up magazine he had found.
"Snap out of it you hentai! I have a costume idea for us!"
"Oh hell, can't that wait?"
"Look, you wanna-be Master Roshi…"
"WHAT DID YOU CALL ME!?!?!??!?!?!?"
In a conviently nearby store, Goku was looking over cans of hair spray.
"Hmmmmmmm…this one looks good…but I need one with maximum stiffness…" Goku said, and continued to puzzle over the various brands. So absorbed was he in the task that he failed to notice the nearby magazine shop exploding and SSJ2 Goten and Trunks flying out of it while engaged in a furious battle with each other.
Nor did he notice the errant ki blast hurled by Trunks that was supposed to hit Goten fail to do so and fly through the window directly at the section Goku was in.
However, he did notice the fact there was a sudden burst of heat as the ki blast hit nearby spray cans. Goku looked over at it in confusion.
"What the…?"
KABOOM!
Elsewhere, Piccolo was meditating.
"Go away. I'm not getting dragged into your crazy story." Piccolo snarled.
("Oh, you're no fun.")
Back at the store, an employee stood staring in horror as Goten and Trunks fought off into the distance, and then turned around in the section that they had destroyed.
"How terrible…that poor man…" the employee said, and then his eyes widened even more as the smoke cleared to reveal Goku, without a stratch on him but with a slightly dazed look in his eyes that cleared quickly.
"Ouch. That was…interesting." Goku said. He looked at the employee, smiled, and brought up his hand to wave.
"Hi!"
"You can't be alive! You were blown up a few paragraphs ago!" the employee said increduously.
"Uhhhhhhh…I was wearing my explosion proof vest! Yes, that's it! I'd like one of these please." Goku said, holding out the can of hair spray he had been looking at before. It took a second for him to realize he was merely holding a torn and burnt out shell.
"Um, I mean I'd like one that's not destroyed! Do you take checks?" Goku smiled.
Elsewhere, Vegeta was walking along.
"OH NO! YOU'RE THAT CRAZY AUTHOR THAT'S ALWAYS DOING HORRIBLE THINGS TO ME AND MY FAMILY!" Vegeta screamed, and flew off into the sky as fast as possible.
("Dammit, he saw me coming.")
Elsewhere (do I like this word or what?), Goten and Trunks stood panting and looking at each other with saitisfaction.
"Good fight." Trunks said, shaking his best friend's hand. "Now what was that costume idea?"
"This." Goten said, as he pulled out the magazine, which had miraculously survived their explosive battle. "I think we should dress up as these guys."
Trunks looked it over.
"Might just work…looks pretty good actually! But who are we gonna have to play…" Trunks trailed off as his eyes lit up.
"Hey Goten, give Marron a call. I think she might actually enjoy this."
Elsewhere, Piccolo was…
"OH NO YOU DON'T! You're not using me as a patsy in place of Vegeta! Go away!" Piccolo snarled again.
("You're still bitter about getting killed in Consuming Madness, aren't you?")
"Damn straight!"
"So that's my idea! We can do it for Halloween!" Goku said. Gohan looked at his father's shining eyes.
"You certainly get excited about these things, don't you Toussan?" Gohan chuckled, adjusting his glasses.
"Why shouldn't I?"
"Good point. Well Toussan, it does sound like fun, but to pull it off to that degree, I'm not sure, we only have a few days to…"
"Oh, it can't be that long! Let's go!" Goku said, grabbing his son's wrist and teleporting away.
A few seconds later, they teleported back.
"Sorry. I forgot you just came out of the shower. Maybe I should of thought of that before I teleported us into the middle of the Satan City mall." Goku said sheepishly, scratching the back of his head. Gohan, his face firey red, nodded his head in a "You think so?" way.
And so the DBZ Gang, who had all conviently received invitations…
"EXCEPT PICCOLO!"
…right, except everyone's favorite Namek went to work using the last few days before Halloween to get the materials needed for their costumes and putting them together, and in Goku and Gohan's case, to watch a few videos over and over and over again, and put on many comedy displays to the delight of Pan.
And finally, the night arrived.
Ding Dong!
"Vegeta, the first guests are arriving!" Bulma yelled up the stairs.
"I CAN HEAR, WOMAN!" Vegeta yelled back.
Bulma sighed and headed for the door, dressed as a member of Queen…
"Not a member of Queen! A QUEEN!" Bulma yelled.
("Ooops, sorry.")
…as A queen, and opened the door.
"Hello! We decided to come as someone we know!" Krillian said. He was dressed like Tien, and was standing on stilts, had a head mask on to make him appear bald as he had been for most of his life, and had a false third eye stuck to his forehead. He walked in with his wife Eighteen, who was dressed as her brother and had dyed her hair black to add to the effect.
"Well, if it isn't the monk formally described as bald…hey, you changed back to bald!" Vegeta smirked, as he came down the stairs dressed as a king. Krillian rolled his eyes.
"Why am I not surprised at your choice of costume?" Krillian said.
"This is how I am! I am the king of the saiya-jin race! This merely tells it to the whole world!" Vegeta crowed.
"Pikachu!" came a female voice, and then Bra leapt over her father (not a hard task there) and began bouncing around, dressed up as the sickenly cute yellow mouse pokemon. Bulma and Eighteen immediately launched into soliquays on how adorable it was, and Krillian leaned against the wall, taking much pleasure in the sour frown on Vegeta's face.
"I tried to convince her to dress as a princess, but noooooo…she had to be that yellow rat!" Vegeta cursed under his breath.
"Hey Vegeta, she must get that stubborness from you!" Krillian quipped. Then he gulped as Vegeta turned angry eyes on him. Eyes that were suddenly glowing green.
"Hey Bulma, have you seen Marron?" Eighteen asked.
"Yeah, actually she's here! She and Goten as doing some kind of group costume and she came over here earlier to prepare for it."
"Oh. I was wondering…"
"YEEEOOOOWWWW!" Krillian screamed, running past the two women with his ass on fire. As he ran into the hallway, Bulma glared up at her husband.
"VEGETA!"
"Sorry, couldn't resist." Vegeta said, the smirk on his face telling everyone who knew him that the ability to resist what he had just did had never existed in him and never would.
"Just don't do it again, please? We want to have fun, and we can't do that with you Final Flashing everyone!"
"Ok, I won't Final Flash anyone." Vegeta said, the smirk still on his face.
"And no Big Banging, Gallet Gunning, or any other sort of ki attacking either!"
"D'OH!"
"Mother, what's all the commotion our here? And why does Krillian have his butt in the freezer?" Trunks said, poking his head in from the hallway.
"It's a long story son. Let's just say…your father."
"Ah, no further explanation needed." Trunks replied. "Do you know where those fish-net stockings I need are?"
"I laid them on your bed, Trunks."
"Thanks!" Trunks replied, and disappeared.
"I swear, if he comes out dressed as something from the Rocky Horror Picture Show, I will have no son, literally!" Vegeta said, although there was an undertone of humour in his voice for once.
"Vegeta…" Bulma sighed, and then the doorbell rang again.
Elsewhere, Piccolo was still meditating. Except now he was in an old church belfry.
"Hey! I wasn't here a second ago! How the HFIL did I get here?" Piccolo said in amazement.
("Heh heh heh…defy ME, will you…")
"Grrrrrrr…well, no matter. I can still meditate, and you aren't going to stop me from doing it!" Piccolo shot back, as the sun set off in the horizon.
("No, not if I want to piss off your legions of fans…but I can do THIS…")
Then a bat fluttered down to the floor, seperating itself from its companions for some unknown reason. It landed on the ground and was suddenly engulfed by smoke.
"Oh no, what now…" Piccolo sighed, and set himself out of his meditating pose and drifted down to his feet, watching the as the smoke formed into a human shape. Then the smoke vanished, and a short, oily man in black garmets and a cape was suddenly standing in front of Piccolo.
"Good eeeevening! I am Count Von Vamp!" the newly named vampire known now as Count Von Vamp said to Piccolo, eying the Namek, apparently not noticing how different Piccolo looked from a normal human.
"My, you have a lovely green nnneeccckkkk…mind if I take a BITE?" Count Von Vamp said as he bared his fangs and leapt at Piccolo.
Piccolo calmly stepped to the side and Count Von Vamp leapt right out of the belfrey with a scream, plummeting down into the church graveyard with a crunch.
"Gravity's a bitch, isn't it?" Piccolo muttered, as Count Von Vamp leapt to his feet and raced back into the church and up the stairs to the belfry, yelling all the way.
"Ok, just for that, I'm going to bite your nose too!" Count Von Vamp yelled as he finally came back into the belfry. "Oh, I'm going to give you such a bite!"
Count Von Vamp leapt at Piccolo again.
Piccolo calmly moved aside again, and Count Von Vamp found himself again taking the vertical trip back to the graveyard.
"ARRRRGGHHHHH…CRUNCH!"
"He flew better when he was a bat." Piccolo again remarked, and watched as Count Von Vamp again jumped up and ran back into the church, cursing.
"This could go on all night…I'd best take care of this." Piccolo said, and moved in front of the giant church bell as Count Von Vamp exploded back into the belfry.
"I wwwwiilll not miss this time, green one! I will have my bite!" Count Von Vamp said, and leapt at Piccolo even faster then before.
Piccolo teleported away, and Count Von Vamp leapt right into the church bell.
BBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"Lemme guess, if I stay here, you're gonna keep annoying me with these characters, aren't you?" Piccolo said, his hands over his ears to try and drown out the ringing Count Von Vamp had caused when he'd slammed himself into a coma.
("Pretty much, but look on the bright side! You really rang his bell!")
"Grrrrrr…maybe that party doesn't sound so bad after all…" Piccolo growled, and flew off into the horizon, leaving the unconscious Count Von Vamp behind.
"Is everyone here?" Bulma asked, looking around the room. Everyone had arrived. Yamcha was dressed up as Tai from Digimon, Tien was a puppeteer and Chaozu was his puppet, Ubuu was dressed as his teacher Goku, Chi Chi was a chef, Videl was dressed up as Sailor Mars, and Pan was dressed up as Buttercup from the Powerpuff Girls. Goku and Gohan had also arrived, but they had had sacks over them with eyeholes to prevent anyone from seeing their costumes, which they claimed was a surprise. Trunks, Goten, and Marron were also absent, claiming they were also finishing up their costumes. Finally, at the last minute, Piccolo had shown up, grumbling to himself. When Bulma had asked what his costume was, Piccolo had merely growled "a pissed off Namek-jin", and set himself up in the corner to meditate. He floated there still.
"Ok son! You've had long enough! Let's see your costume!" Vegeta yelled, sitting on the couch with Bulma and Bra in his lap. "I am growing tired of waiting!"
"Ok Dad!" Trunks's voice came from behind a curtain the two had set up. A stereo was slid out from behind the curtain.
"Put that on a table and play it! And set some chairs up around the curtain!" Trunks said from behind the curtain. Vegeta sighed as Yamcha and Ubuu did what Trunks had said.
"Ok, play it!"
Yamcha pressed the play button, and a hard hitting rock tune consisting almost entirely of guitars started up.
"Coming to the ring, the HARDY BOYZ!" the tape said, and then Trunks and Goten swept out from behind the curtain, dressed up in the style of the extreme and suicidal wrestlers. Both were wearing black jeans and boots. Goten had a dark red shirt on, Trunks had on a see-through shirt. Trunks's hair was dyed a multiple of colours to go with his natural purple. Both had black fishneck stockings pulled onto their arms, and then even had makeshift metal belts with gold paint and artificial leather to simulate the Hardyz tag teams belts. As the two leapt onto the chairs, putting one foot on the seat and the other on the back and pointing their fingers at their heads in gun shapes, Marron swept in behind them dressed up as Lita. She was wearing extremely loose jeans and a tank top, her hair let down and dyed black, and a huge dragon tattoo on her bare shoulder, and her own gold belt over her shoulder. She pointed at the two hybrids standing on the chairs as they continued to stand and move their arms like the Hardyz.
There was scattered laughter and applause. Bra liked the image of Trunks dressed as Jeff Hardy, and showed it by laughing continuously. Vegeta just looked confused.
"You don't watch a lot of wrestling, do you?" Yamcha said. Vegeta cocked an eyebrow.
"That fake combat? Is Trunks dressed up as one of them? How…strange…" Vegeta said.
"Oh lighten up Dad. It's Halloween." Trunks said, sitting next to his father. Eighteen and Krillian were staring in horror at their daughter, or more specifically, the huge tattoo on her shoulder. Marron laughed.
"Don't worry Mom, Dad, it's just drawn on. It'll wash off in a few days." Marron chuckled. The former monk and andriod looked relieved.
"Well, that just leaves Kakarott and his spawn. I wonder what they'll be dressed up as. Probably Barney and one of the Teletubbies." Vegeta chuckled.
"I'll get them. Put this in the stereo now, but don't play it." Pan said, handing Yamcha another tape and heading into the hallway beyond the curtain. Yamcha shrugged and put the tape in.
"Damn, they beat us to the punch…sort of." Gohan said, coming on the room in respond to Pan's knock. Pan giggled.
"You look so silly, daddy." Pan giggled. Then Goku came out behind his son, and Pan's giggles erupted into full-blown laughter.
"Guess we'll just have to turn up even more. Good thing we spent all that time practicing, right Gohan?" Goku said, straightening the hat he wore. "I'm glad I picked this trick up in the room of Spirit and Time."
"Yes Toussan. You remember what to do, sweetie?" Gohan said.
"Yep! I'll go do it!" Pan said, and skipped off back to the curtain.
"Ok toussan. Let's make fools of ourselves." Gohan chuckled, and headed for the curtain.
Everyone was watching as Pan came back out from the curtain. Even Piccolo had an eye open, curious on what Goku and Gohan had planned.
Pan fetched the stereo and stood in front of the curtain.
"Presenting…Grand Master Sexay! And Scottie Too Hottie! TOO COOL!" Pan said, and pressed the button.
A blasting hip-hop tune came out of the speakers, and then Goku and Gohan pushed aside the curtain and came out dancing. Both were dressed up in hip-hop gear that matched the tag team's gear exactly. Gohan had Grand Master Sexay's hair extensions, modified tuque, and goggles. Goku was in SSJ, but he had hairsprayed his blonde hair so that it stood straight up, and was kept in place by a hat. Goku wore sunglasses instead of goggles.
As everyone's jaw dropped, Goku and Gohan promptly exploded into dance, mimicing Too Cool exactly, prancing and moving themselves exactly how the tag team might on their way down to the ring. (And if you've never seen that…www.wwftoocool.com, it's somewhere on there in the video section. For those who have…picture Gohan and Goku dancing EXACTLY like that).
Vegeta lasted three seconds. Then he fell off the couch laughing.
"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!!!!!!!!! KAKAROTT A HIP HOP…IT'S TWO FOOLZ!!!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Vegeta laughed, rolling around on the floor. Goku and Gohan kept dancing, oblivious to the fact that all the male fighters were in the process of dying by laughter. Even Piccolo was consumed by it.
"OH KAMI! I'm gonna piss myself, and I don't even have anything to piss WITH!" Piccolo roared, and was again helpless with laughter.
The music died down, and Goku and Gohan stopped with a final pose.
It took a while longer for the laughter to stop.
"Good one Dad! You win hands down! HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!" Goten laughed, tears pouring from his eyes.
Goku just smiled.
Far away, a bright light suddenly broke the darkness of the night, and when it faded, Freiza stood there.
"Ha HA! I have my one day back to the living! It took seemingly forever for them to grant it to me, but I have it! And I know just what I'm going to do with it: KILL THAT MONKEY!" Freiza screamed, and flew off into the night, heading for the Briefs house, which he conviently happened to know the location of.
A short time later, Freiza landed in front of the Briefs house and knocked on the door, visualizing all the things he was going to do to Goku.
He almost didn't recognize the saiya-jin when he came to the door, his dress and appearance were so different.
"Hey, GREAT costume! You look just like Freiza! Who is that any-"
POW! Goku went flying across the room as Freiza punched him. Fortunetely, Goku came to his senses almost immediately and turned around in mid-air, bouncing off the wall with his feet.
"Stupid monkey! This is no costume! It is I, Freiza, back for my revenge! You will suffer for…"Freiza's voice trailed off when the assembled DBZ group filed behind Goku, all looking ready for a fight.
"Well "Freiza", if that is you, might I remind you how much stronger all of us have gotten since we fought?" Vegeta said, smirking. Freiza "eeped"
"Mommy."
POW! Freiza quickly found himself on a one way trip backwards. Nauseous and dizzy, he stumbled to his feet, looking around the city block where he now was, surrounded by trick or treaters who were all staring at him.
"Your costume is funny!" said a little girl dressed up as a fairy. Freiza turned burning eyes on her.
"I'll show you what's funny you little-ARGH!" Freiza screamed as Goku came up from behind him, grabbed his head, and leapt forward, bulldogging Freiza into the concrete.
Freiza rolled onto his back, stars dancing in his eyes, and Goku got an idea.
As the other Z Fighters arrived, Goku whipped off his hat and began to dance in a way that made him looking like he was running in place. A good many kids recognized Goku's costume and what he was doing and began to cheer.
"What is he doing?" Vegeta said incredulously. Gohan smirked. He knew this move.
"The Worm."
Goku turned around and began hopping on one foot in an arc away from Freiza. The kids chanted along with each hop.
"W-O-R-M! THE WORM!" They all cheered as Goku broke out a perfect rendition of the wiggling disco move towards Freiza, who was still lying there dazed. The Z Fighters again collasped in laughter as Goku "wormed" his way back towards Freiza, before coming back to his feet right in front of him and waving his arms back and forth.
"HOO! HOO! HOO! HI-YA!" Goku chanted along with the kids, and then dropped down, slamming a knife edge chop into Freiza's throat. Freiza's eyes shot up and he sat up while grabbing his throat and choking, The kids all cheered and Goku played to them.
"Lousy monkey! How dare you humilate me like that!" Freiza screamed as he jumped up and leapt at Goku's back.
But before he could do anything, Goten phased in front of him and kicked him in the gut, doubling him over with a gasp. Goten grabbed his head and pointed at Trunks, who was climbing on top of a nearby house.
"Twist of Fate! YEAH!" Goten said, and twisted his body around and smashed Freiza with the modified Ace Crusher. "Go for it Trunks!"
"Yeah!!!!!" Trunks said, whipping off his shirt and pointing twin finger pistols on his head. "You got nothing on ME, JEFF HARDY!"
Then Trunks leapt off the house, flipping over in mid-air and smashing Freiza into the ground with the Swanton Bomb with his back, using gravity and a little ki power to drive Freiza deep into the ground. Trunks leapt up and joined Goku with his playing to the kids. On the ground, Freiza groaned.
"This day could not get any worse."
Then Vegeta was staring over him.
"I watch a little wrestling as well Freiza." Vegeta said, and whipped off the heavy robe he had been wearing as a king to reveal he had somehow put on a saiya-jin bodysuit in the space of time he was given to put one on.
"Hey, look at Vegeta!" Goku said, and everyone's attention was drawn to Vegeta as he kicked Freiza in the shoulder and reached up, slowly and dramatically removing his glove and tossing it to the kids.
"Yes, it is THE-MOST ELECTRIFYING MOVE IN SPORTS ENTERTAINMENT…"Goku crowed as Vegeta ran back and forth before stopping above Freiza, before lifting his leg and giving it a little shake. "…THE PEOPLE'S ELBOW!"
WHAM! Vegeta drove the elbow straight into Freiza's chest. The crowd of gathered kids broke into the loudest round of applause yet as Vegeta stood up.
"Now hit the road, weakling!" Vegeta taunted before kicking Freiza off into the dark horizon, where he vanished with a fading yell. "That was fun."
"Dance! Dance!" the kids were chanting. Goku turned to Gohan.
"Bring the stereo?"
"I did!" Pan said, flying in with the stereo. Vegeta sighed and turned to leave when Goku grabbed his arm.
"Hey Vegeta, don't go yet! You can help us!"
"What? Dance with YOU? No way! I'LL NEVER…"Vegeta got out before Goku slipped a pair of sunglasses over his eyes.
The glasses had a seeming magical effect on Vegeta, as he suddenly stopped his protest. Then he smirked at Goku.
"Fine. If I must humilate you with EVERYTHING Kakarott…" Vegeta said, and took his place. Gohan had tossed shades to Trunks, Goten and Marron, and they all took up places with Pan in front of them.
"HIT IT!"
The music started, and to the kids's delight, the six saiya-jins, hybrids, and one human all broke out into a somewhat simultaneous dance, and as the kids cheered, and the Z Fighters not dancing again either killed themselves laughing again or by applauding along with the kids, "Too Cool" and co danced on into the night.
In severe pain but also burning with anger, Freiza pulled himself from the crator his impact had made.
"GRRRRRRRR…YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS, YOU MONKEYS! I WILL KILL EVERY HUMAN I MEET UNTIL I FIND YOU AGAIN, AND THIS TIME…" Freiza screamed, before he was interrupted by a tapping on his shoulder. He spun around.
And saw the most horrifying sight he had ever seen, as a huge figure loomed in front of him, clad in a ghost-white mask that ended with artificial night-black hair and holding a knife dripping with blood. From behind the mask stared the blackest, most evil eyes Freiza had ever seen, evil so strong even his was nothing compared to it.
"……….AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! MOMMMMMMMMMMMMMYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Freiza screamed as he turned around and began digging his way into the ground at lightening speed, tunneling his way back to hell.
The figure stood quietly, watching as Freiza's frantic digging efforts sealed the tunnel behind him. Then his shoulders began to shake as the figure laughed, before reaching up to remove his mask and take out his contacts.
"Happy Halloween, everyone!" Ash the Wanderer said. "May it be scary and full of sugar! Now, if you don't mind…" Ash said as he popped the contacts back in and slid the white mask back on to go with his tattered boiler suit. "Micheal Myers has a legacy to live up to this night, and I plan to do him proud at the expense of a few people…"
Ash turned and vanished into the night, his last whisper floating back to the readers.
"Oh Flamers…members of JACKASS…I have your Flame Games right here…I just hope you're stupid enough that your parents never bothered to tell you to never talk to strangers…if you even know who your parents are…"
Happy Halloween!
The End