Author Notes: Sorry for such a depressing fic. I guess I got carried away by how bad Hinata was feeling after watching that short clip from the last movie when Baka Naruto refused to escort Hinata home and got scolded by Sakura. I got inspired by that scene and maximize the insecurity of Hinata feelings by delving into her thoughts regarding Naruto and Sakura closeness of friendship and bonds.
I guess you can say that this fic could happened after the whole Toneri debacles, and the timeline is somewhere when they were dating each other. I'm sorry if all character is OOC, I'm not a huge fan of Naruto, so the whole first love thing could be hit and miss in this fic, please read with caution.
R&R please, and thank you.
I watch them laugh together, joking and teasing each other, easy and relax, at ease with their body language, familiar and happy, a beautiful bond that I always secretly envy, a bond that i longed to have with him, yet realistic enough to know that i will never be able to be the one girl that he love first in his heart.
Even now, after all the painful journey and harsh struggles that we all have to endured to finally get this hard earned peace, after fighting Toneri and his sudden assault, after tearful confessions of love and dating each other, I still cannot push away shadows of doubts from my mind, ugly whispers that haunts my conciousness whenever i saw them together, dark whispers that follow me until i can feel them raking their lies in my sleep, tangling me like puppets in my dreams, twisting everything precious into nightmare.
I always feel like a shadow myself, watching them, watching him, always watching from the sideline, always watching from afar, forever watching and waiting, for him to notice me, even once to acknowledge my existence.
Even after his promise to always love me, to stay by my side till death, I still cannot help but wonder, if he ever regret making those promises, for staying by my side, because he never go back on his words, yet sometimes, when I watch them together, standing side by side, strong and beautiful, I can clearly hear those ugly whispers deep within my mind, and i know that i will never be his first love.