Chapter 1

I was standing in the porch : the rain had been pouring for 30 mins now, and I was definitely beginning to really be annoyed by that...

As I was rummaging dark and shameful thoughts about work, I didn't notice that I wasn't alone anymore in "my" porch until I heard some guy coughing right next to me, catching his breath.
There he was: leaning against the wall, looking down, lost in his thoughts, also waiting for the rain to stop, even if it seamed that he got a bit more of it than myself - he was dripping wet when I just had been a little "sprayed".
He was tall, incredibly built, dark and short haired, with this perfect nose and a stubble from probably 2 days without a good shave...
He was wearing tight jeans, a white tanktop under an opened shirt shaping perfectly a strong torso revealed by its wetness, and some really used boots.
Something about his look screamed to me "army" from all over the place, even if I wasn't quite sure where this feeling came from...

Of course as I was struck right to the spot by his apparition, I was staring at him like an idiot and of course, he happened to notice it...
He turned so suddenly his stare to me, not quite moving his head, just looking at me from under his eyebrows that it surprised me and I even jumped a little. I was very embarrassed and looked away very quickly, but not quickly enough.
I was amazed of how handsome he was and my mouth was still opened a bit in shock. Let me tell you that the look he just gave me wasn't helping me at all to get my brain back, you can trust me on that!
He didn't say a word, but I knew, even if I was now shamefully looking at my own feet, that he was, himself, staring at me: I felt his blazing eyes on my body, scrutinizing my every move.

I was trying really hard to not look back at him, repeating endlessly in my head "don't, don't look back at him, don't, please, just don't, you already fooled yourself enough, stop it"... I even thought of leaving, even if the weather hadn't improved at all...
But I couldn't, I just couldn't: he was like a magnet from which I wouldn't resist being attracted to any longer.
But still I tried... I tried to have just a little side-look, only allowing me to start with his boots, I tried very hard to keep my eyes on them, tried not to move up along his endless legs, not to look at his perfect thighs, neither at this particular part of his anatomy- mother nature seemed to have been really kind with him on this matter and I lingered there a bit.

I promised myself, then, that I wouldn't- I swear!- devour his torso with my eyes as the rain didn't leave much to guess there: his white tanktop was nothing but transparency... I was lost... I wasn't strong enough... I couldn't stop myself from licking my upper lip while absorbing every inch of his anatomy: nobody had ever produced that kind of effect on me...

Yes, I was lost, and struggling to stop my eyes from keeping their way up to his face... I miserably failed and soon I was discovering his lips... He appeared amused by my behaviour as a half smile played on them. That surprised me cause surely I didn't look any more "brighter" than before... and most of all I was quite a mess because the tears I just shedded after what happened with that jerk of a boss from the bar, so that took me off guards and once more, without really anticipating it, I found myself staring right into his eyes..
All my thoughts were blank in a second then! His eyes, oh my god, they were so damn blue, I never saw that before. How was I supposed to react...?! How was I supposed to cope with the feelings I was having, right now, down there in my belly: butterflies going crazy all over the place...?!
My eyes kept darting from his lips to his eyes, I was mesmerized, and felt so stupid at the same time!
When our eyes locked for the 3rd or 4th time, while still smiling he just said to me, arching an eyebrow: "well, hello there?!".
Ok I might have, as well, collapsed right there right then, cause in top of all the perfections he already displayed, his voice was just the most arousing sound I've ever heard, yet.
It was so deep, but still so soft, a mix between velvet and dark brown chocolate (I've always wondered before how one could possibly associate chocolate with a sound?! I wasn't wondering anymore, he was the living proof of that possibility! )...
I realised, when I tried to answer him, that I had been holding my breath during the whole process... so I allowed some air back before answering, puzzled, a pitiful "Hello".

He laughed, an earnest laugh, truly amused now and straightened himself, really standing. He entirely turned my way to properly face me, I mirrored him and tried to smile back too, but that only resulted in a shy and apologistic smile, poor attempt of my usual dazzling smile (or so I've been told!), so I ended up, in top of all the embarrassment, blushing tomato red... As realisation hit me, I deeply rolled my eyes, letting out, without thinking, a really annoyed "oh great now" , that made him laugh even more...
This time I have to admit that I laughed too, because of how stupid and ridiculous I felt, because of the situation, because the tension and the fear from earlier was finally leaving me and because I would have done anything in the world to make that man laugh even more, cause that was the most amazing thing to witness...
He hold his hand to me and introduced himself while I was taking it into mine :
"I'm John, John Porter", he said, "and you are?".
I was in a haze, and vaguely aware of my answer: "You can call me Angèle...", our eyes were locked and he has kept my hand in his. I think I heard him whisper something like "Indeed, how appropriate...", but couldn't swear it.
I was not even touching the ground at the moment, I was way too high to realise clearly anything! He squeezed slightly my hand and put his left one on top of it, giving me a breathtaking smile he told me "it's a pleasure to meet you, Angèle"!
Hearing my name pronounced with his voice sent shivers down my spine. I looked at our hands together and back at his eyes which were making me forget just about everything else and answered "same here John".

Right at this moment there was a lightening followed by the thunder and I screamed and started a bit. He arched an eyebrow and wondered out loud "well now, you're scared of the thunder?", I blushed a bit more and answer with half a smile "yeah, a bit".

He looked around us, and spotted the bar right across the street, the very one I work in, still holding my hand, he started to move and said "Come on, we're gonna wait for the rain to stop inside that bar over there! Come!".
Despite the fact that I was hypnotised by his use of *we*, which was delightful to hear, and by the fact that he wanted to stay with me a while longer, which was truly unbelievable, I stopped abruptly, looking down once more at my feet, embarrassed.
He turned around and asked "What is it?", his voice full of concern, which made my tears coming back to my eyes.
With one finger he raised my chin to make our eyes meet and then took my face with both his hands very gently, but I still didn't want to look at him, I didn't want to lose it in front of him, so I kept avoiding his stare.
He asked again "what's the matter sweetie? Tell me?!"... my tears went on even more and I looked down, ashamed...

How could I tell him what happened barely an hour ago? How could I tell him that my boss: the bar owner, has been harassing me since the very first day I've worked for him? That while finishing my working day, cleaning the tables and passing by him in the backroom he suddenly pushed me against the wall? How could I described to him the fear I felt at that moment and that I was still feeling right now?! Never could I tell him that this pig, then, put his awful lips all over my face, licking me, touching me everywhere, while I was trying to push him away. That he told me that if I wanted to keep my job I'd have to obey and comply? How could I confess that in a desperate need for this job, I, then, surrendered to him, that this asshole was only stopped, not by "coward me", but by the ring of the front door being opened by a carefree customers? No I couldn't... but what could I tell John then? I was too ashamed to confess what happened, and he was well aware of my internal struggle.