Smoke & Mirrors

AN: Be forewarned that it gets sort of slashy near the end. Also, in this, John doesn't tell Ben to go to Hydra Island; he just has him travel with the others Lockies.

Before joining up with "Locke", Ben did hesitate at first, especially when faced with shooting Ilana. What had possessed him, in that moment—Esau's promises, a longing to be wanted somewhere? One way or another, it hardly mattered now, as he straggled behind Locke's little group to some unknown destination. For the most part Ben shadowed them in silence, fixing his eyes on the road before him and not daring to look up at Locke, or the monster inhabited that body now.

Since Locke acted like they needed Ben, he'd expected, or hoped for, a difference in the way they treated him from how Ilana, Frank, Sun, and Miles did, but for the most part everyone ignored him. That wasn't the real problem, though; Ben had imagined or witnessed far worse fates than being ignored. But the ones with Locke behaved unpredictably, sometimes lashing out for no reason, especially Claire and Sawyer. Then there was Sayid, who glared at Ben every time he got the chance, yet refused to speak or even blink at times. Jin wouldn't look anyone in the eye and mumbled nervously to himself, like some of the Others from the Temple. A few of them wept constantly, bemoaning their fate. Locke himself refused to answer any questions, and spoke in cryptic riddles. At times, Ben asked himself if he'd wandered into a madhouse, and sometimes he wondered if he should have just finished the job that Ilana had him start.

Naturally, Sawyer wasn't thrilled to see him anymore than the others. "Who the hell invited you?"

Shrinking away, Ben stepped back into the group of people trailing behind Locke. "John Locke." With any luck, Sawyer would let Ben slip into the crowd and wouldn't question him further.

"And just why would he do a thing like that?" Sawyer closed the gap between them and loomed over the Others' former leader. "Why would Locke want you on his side?"

"I suggest you ask him."

Sawyer gritted his teeth. "Watch it, y'little weasel."

Shaking his head, Ben ignored the insult. He didn't even want to talk to anyone right now, much less start a conflict with Sawyer, of all people. Though Ben could not have known it, the hatred behind each of Sawyer's words stemmed from the fact that, every time Sawyer looked at Ben, Sawyer saw the man who had tried to own Juliet, confining her to the Island. "What, cat got yer tongue?" he continued.

Ben struggled to remain calm as he said, "I don't know what you are talking about, Sawyer. This is hardly the time to—"

"Don't you patronize me. First you kill Alex, and now Juliet? Where's it gonna stop, huh?"

Now Ben couldn't stop his voice from rising. "I did nothing to Juliet. Had you stayed out of it, she would have stayed with me and lived. But instead, you had to bring her with you, and look where that—" Anticipating Sawyer's fury, Ben jolted away, but a fist connected with his jaw. He sidestepped again, but a blow landed on his side, and he stumbled back. Grunting in pain, he twisted away. Sawyer moved faster and shoved Ben onto the ground. The all-too-familiar coppery taste of blood spread on his lip as a sharp pain exploded in his skull, not once but twice, and dark spots filled his vision.

"What's all this about?" Relief washed over Ben at hearing John's voice, but then he froze, remembering that John Locke really hadn't spoken. Rolling over on his side, he saw Sawyer and the false Locke standing over him while the others backed away.

Though Ben opened his mouth to reply, Sawyer answered first. "That son of a bitch can't keep his mouth shut." Recalling how Sawyer had provoked him, Ben wanted to roll his eyes and retort with some sarcastic remark, but the splitting headache warned him against it.

"Can you stand, Ben?" asked John, offering a hand. Clutching it, Ben rose to his feet and winced in pain. "Why don't you walk with me?" John's eyes crinkled when he smiled in that way so reminiscent of the real Locke, and Ben nodded in reply. Leading him to the front of the crowd, Locke grasped Ben's shoulder, probably intending to be reassuring, and Ben suppressed a shudder. The smoke monster resembled the man of faith in so many ways, from physical appearance to mannerisms like the way he squared his shoulders as he walked, but the differences between John and Esau were many—and many of them unnerved Ben every time he looked at the new Locke.

"So, I see you and Sawyer got into a disagreement back there?" he asked, looking at Ben as he walked. Ben met his eyes, but only just.

"You might call it that."

John smiled again, and Ben wished he would stop. "Ah, don't worry. You won't have to put up with him for much longer."

"Really." Wondering what that meant, Ben spoke in as hollow and flat a tone as he could muster.

"Really. And that's probably for the better; I'd hate to see either of you get hurt."

I'm sure you would.

"Sorry, I didn't quite catch that. What did you say?"

For a moment, Ben stared at Locke before remembering himself and blinking a few times. "Nothing, John." Had Ben voiced his thoughts aloud, or did he have reason to fear the false Locke even more?

"Fair enough." When John squeezed Ben's shoulder, it was all he could do to keep walking and not shake the hand off.

No one spoke after that, and Ben expected John to release his shoulder, but John's grip remained so tight that his knuckles whitened. As Ben followed for what seemed like hours to some unknown destination, his shoulder began to ache almost as much as his head, and he knew that his shoulder would be dark with bruises where John's fingers dug into him. "What do you want from me, John?" Even though he knew he wasn't speaking to the real John, Ben had nothing else to call him.

"I already told you, Ben. Someone's got to stay on the Island when the rest of us are gone, and you're just the person to do it. No one knows this place like you."

Though Ben nodded and swelled with pride at that statement, he couldn't shake the suspicion that crept into his mind every time Locke spoke. Though the man walked and talked like John, he was anything but, and couldn't be trusted any more than Ben Linus himself. And of course, there was the fact that he could also turn into a pillar of black smoke, which probably qualified him as being slightly more dangerous.

Suddenly a woman cried out above the idle chatter of those walking behind Locke. "Kayla, Kayla!" A few seconds later, "Has anyone seen my daughter? Anybody?" Her voice shook with terror. "You can't miss her; she's five and looks just like me. Bright red hair, a little over three feet…." She demonstrated with her hands for those around her and glanced around in desperation before running up to Locke. "Tell them to stop for a minute. We have to find my daughter!"

When John shrugged nonchalantly, Ben noticed lines of tension in the set of his jaw and the rigidity of his spine. "I'm sorry, but we don't have time." Finally Locke let go of Ben and held out his arm to keep the woman off of him.

"You won't do anything?" Sobbing, she wiped her eyes and searched both John and Ben's faces. "Please, we have to stop, we have to find Kayla—"

Looking straight ahead, John replied, "We can't stop."

Tears streamed down her puffy red cheeks. "I left the Temple for her sake, you can't just leave her behind—"

Still walking, John shoved her away, and she stared at he and Ben, stunned. Ben swallowed and forced himself to look away, unable to watch someone else lose their daughter, when it might still be possible to save them. "Please!" she begged the others, who all filed behind Locke like soldiers. "Kayla!" A few of the others looked at one another helplessly, but no one dared breathe a word of objection against John. Ben prayed that John wouldn't say anything more about it; if he did, Ben wasn't sure he could keep silent, but at the same time he didn't want John to kill him, either. While John claimed to need Ben, he doubted that the smoke monster needed him enough to let it go if Ben challenged him.

Thankfully, they walked in silence until Ben's feet ached and blisters rubbed up against the sides of his worn shoes. When the sun set, he wondered if Locke would stop then, but instead the leader only lit a torch and trekked further into the jungle, indicating nothing as to when they would rest. Does he need rest at all? For that matter, did a smoke monster sleep? Ben marveled at how little he knew, all the while traveling with the very enigma that no one understood except perhaps Jacob, who could hardly answer any questions now.

Suddenly Locke stopped walking and thrust one hand in the air, halting those behind him. "We'll set up camp here. Don't get too comfortable—we leave at dawn."

As the others propped up tents and rolled out their blankets, or whatever else they had grabbed while leaving the shelter of the Temple, Ben realized that he had left Ilana's camp with no supplies at all. Even the ones from the Temple lacking anything to sleep on had taken food on their way out, knowing that they were in for a journey. But everything Ben had remained at Ilana's camp, as he had left it while digging the grave, and had no time to locate it again before fleeing the graveyard.

When he approached Kate, she drew back warily. Hastily he said under his breath, "I don't want to be here any more than you do," knowing that she had to be conflicted about following Locke just like Ben. Though she hesitated for a second, tapping her lower lip in thought, she eventually shrugged and handed him a freshly cooked fish.

Taking a bite, he eyed her tent in question. "I don't have a place to sleep…."

She raised an eyebrow. "Not a chance."

At least he had tried. While the others finished eating and started setting up their tents, Ben looked longingly from one to another but received no offers, not that it surprised him. When nightfall came, and people were starting to file into their shelters, he sat on a log and watched the flames from the campfire lick the air, supposing that he would just have to sleep on the grass. It wasn't pleasant, but it wouldn't be the first time.

Then Locke approached him and extended a hand. "My tent's pretty big. You can stay in there."

Though Ben opened his mouth to object, the glimmer in Locke's eyes warned him against it, so instead he took Locke's hand and stood. "How kind of you." Sarcasm slipped its way in, even through the apprehension, but thankfully John ignored it and gestured for Ben to enter the tent with him. Hesitantly Ben obeyed, noting that it actually was a large tent, with two blankets and pillows. He wondered why exactly Locke had thought to prepare for two.

"It's been a long day." Locke yanked off his shoes, tossed them outside the tent casually, and sat cross-legged on the ground and said, "Don't you think?"

"I suppose so." Ben glanced through the open split in the tent and realized fully then that he sat alone in a tent with the man who had manipulated him and killed those who chose not to obey him and leave the Temple—probably not the best tactical decision, but he couldn't have argued about killing Ilana or following Locke just now into his tent anymore than he could have refused to kill Jacob. He sighed, wondering how Locke pulled him from one bad situation to the next.

"Why don't you take off your shirt, Ben?"

Gaping at Locke, Ben stuttered, "W-what?"

"You did everything possible to become the leader of the Others, anything it took to get in your position. I've always wondered, Ben…what would it be like to see you stripped of all that power?" When John leaned forward, their lips brushed against one another. Ben shuddered and jerked away.

Sudden revulsion seized him, a disgust that crawled on his skin like warm, sticky syrup. He desired frantically to be away, to never lay eyes on this "John" again or have anything touch his lips ever again; he became conscious of his face and Locke's, the unblinking gaze, and he wanted to creep out of his body and hide somewhere safe out of sight, up in the corner of his mind.

When he turned away, he found himself facing John again, and Ben swallowed hard. "What do you want from me?"

"Don't play stupid, Ben; you know exactly what I want but you're too afraid to let yourself understand it." John smiled as Ben grit his teeth at the insult.

"I'm hardly the only one here used to being in power." Though Ben forced a chuckle, it sounded nervous even to his ears. "You have nothing to prove to me. I put myself under your leadership."

"I see you trying to outthink me like you do everyone else, always plotting how to stab me in the back, and you're going to learn that that kind of behavior is unacceptable. But you're right, Ben, that I have nothing to prove. Maybe I just want to see you suffer. After all, you did murder me."

"You don't have to do this, John—"

"Ben?"

He breathed raggedly, chest rising and falling erratically as John stroked his cheeks and felt the rough ridge where Sawyer had cut him. "Yes?"

"You talk too much."

Locke grabbed Ben's hands and pressed them against the ground. Leaning in, John ran his tongue along Ben's lip as Ben closed his eyes tightly, hearing a low growl from somewhere in the back of John's throat. When Ben struggled against him, John only yanked him closer, but in an instant John released his hands and pulled Ben roughly to him. Ben shuddered as John knotted a hand in Ben's dark hair, pulled his head backwards, and bit his neck sharply. All worries of angering John mattered no more to Ben as he cried out, praying that someone would hear and care to investigate, as John hurriedly unbuttoned Ben's shirt.

Ben's eyes widened as the shadow of a woman grew behind the tent flaps, and the zipper holding the flaps together slid down as Kate stepped through. At once she halted, jaw dropping at the sight of John Locke nearly on top of Ben, whose eyes darted back and forth from John to Kate like a rabbit hoping to escape a dog.

In contrast, John glanced calmly up at Kate and asked, "Do you need something?"

Backing away, she said, "If you're busy I can always come back later. But it's an emergency."

Head tilted to one side, John said, "What kind of an emergency?"

"Uh, Claire's a little upset. She threatened me again, and then said she wanted to take one of the Others' children. Yesterday she acted fine but now she's acting like she might attack someone again."

Narrowing his eyes, John rose to his feet. "I'll take care of it."

The two watched him leave, and Kate ran to Ben and said, "You're bleeding. What the hell was he doing to you?"

Ben sat up, face glistening with sweat. "I-I don't know. He's clearly insane."

"Did you make him mad? What did you—" Kate paused, hearing Locke's voice outside the tent as he shouted at Claire, and a shiver danced up Ben's spine. "What did you do?"

"I don't have the slightest idea."

"Look, I need to get away from Claire, and I have a feeling you want to get away from Locke. With the two of us, and Sawyer and Jin, we might have a chance—"

Shaking his head, Ben stammered, "There's n-nowhere else for me to go. I just killed a woman who had me digging my own grave, and I don't think those with her will welcome me back with open arms. Besides, Sawyer wants me dead just as much as the rest of them."

"I'll talk to him. Just make sure you don't."

"I guess it goes without saying that I would be very, very grateful for the chance to escape Locke."

The corner of her mouth turned up in a smile. "I wouldn't leave anyone to what he was going to do. Now come with me, and let's see if Claire can't distract Locke long enough."

Standing to his feet, Ben followed Kate out of the tent. Too often now, he followed others rather than led them himself, but if it had to be that way, he'd prefer Kate over the smoke monster any day. Claire and John were still exchanging words, or really, shouting at one another, and although it seemed that Ben had fled to another side far too often lately, if his luck held then he would be able to do it just one more time.

"This doesn't mean I've forgotten everything you did to us," Kate muttered.

"I know." He hardly expected her to. It was enough that she was providing a way out.

After all, he'd betrayed and backstabbed and run away enough times in his life to have the process down to a science. Maybe he deserved what Locke planned on doing to him, seeing as how he'd murdered the real Locke, but Ben always did have a knack for slipping away at the last second. He didn't know when exactly Kate planned on getting Sawyer and Jin so that they could leave, but now he was certain, more than ever, that this Locke was far more treacherous than anyone had imagined. How much different, he wondered, would all this have been, if he hadn't killed the real John.