Fear.
It was a completely new experience for Tom. Growing up in an orphanage meant that there was little to lose that hadn't already been lost as some point or the other. He had never had any friends that he needed to worry about being adopted.
There had never been anyone that Tom cared about that could disappear, because of the simple fact that Tom had never cared for anyone. There had never been anyone important enough to actually spend time and energy on.
That had been before the green-eyed marvel stumbled into his life.
Literally.
The man had tripped over something or the other, and fallen on top of him out of the blue. Tom didn't even understand what he had tripped on: the ground had been perfectly flat. He had managed to save Harry from hurting himself that time, but he hadn't been around to save him this time, when Harry had really needed him.
A freak accident, they called it. Tom had never had any reason to pay attention to those. He had always believed the blame was to be placed on the person who had been hurt because they were being stupid.
Harry definitely hadn't been stupid. He doubted this was even Harry's fault.
It couldn't be.
Whose fault it was didn't matter. Not yet anyway.
Harry's life was in danger of ending, and there was nothing Tom could do about it. For all the money he had managed to garner through rising to the top of his company, none of that could save Harry as he lay on that operating table clinging to life.
There was nothing he could do, and that was terrifying.
He had been in complete control of everything he had been involved in for as long as he could remember. From teaching the other orphans their place, to every small interaction Tom had ever had with anyone.
Except Harry.
Harry never allowed him to be in control, but Harry had never been in control either. Harry was a delicate mixture of luck and adventure, and Tom wasn't sure if Harry had enough luck right now because Tom knew he had never had any of that.
As he stood there behind the glass, watching the surgeons work on saving Harry, Tom prayed to the gods that had never before listened to him to save Harry. He couldn't go back into that cold and lonely life that he had lived before Harry. Tom didn't know how he would be able to survive it, knowing what the alternative was and having experienced it for several months now.
Fear, before this, was being ridiculed for something he could not help. It was being stuck in that hellhole of an orphanage for the rest of his life. It was not being good enough to improve the terrible situation that was all he had known.
Fear had never been losing anything that couldn't be fixed. Fear had never been anything permanent. It had never been anything life changing.
A cold and clear beep filled the frantic silence.
Written for the OTP Boot Camp Challenge: fear
Written for History of Magic Assignment 7: write about losing something precious