Hey, this is my first fanfiction. I've had the story on my computer for a while and have just decided to post it. Reviews would be great. Hope you enjoy:)

Disclaimer: I do not own Castle, Andrew Marlowe does.

Warmth

Richard Castle was wrapped up under a huge pile of blankets on his couch, yet he still felt cold. It was like the cold from the freezer had seeped into his veins, chilling his blood irreversibly. This was one of the reasons why he was awake in his empty loft at 3:00am in the morning. The other was the fact that he couldn't switch his brain off. It was running through the events of the past couple of days, of how he had somehow come so close to death three times in two days with her, Detective Kate Beckett. He was also having a hard time getting her out of his mind.

The case had started out like any other- victim, blood, him and Beckett doing their cute thinking in sync thing. But then it took a turn for a worse. Her voice as her watch started beeping, and she told him to get out of the storage container scared him, probably because she sounded scared. Images of them being blown up flashed through his mind as he tried to figure out what was going on, refusing to abandon Beckett.

The wait in the isolation tent were some of the scariest moments of Castle's life. He thought he may never be able to see Alexis, his mother, Ryan, Esposito, or Lanie again. He may never have been able to be in a relationship with Katherine Beckett, never tell her he loves her, and never marry her. He may never have been able to spend the rest of his life waking up in bed next to her. As Beckett was talking about how she wanted someone to jump into things with- someone who would be there for her, and whom she could be there for... Castle knew that's what he wanted too, knew that he was that guy. If only that man hadn't interrupted what he had been about to say.

Then there was the freezer. The image of Jamal, pale and still, haunted his mind whenever he shut his eyes. When they realised that no one knew to look for them, or even if they did, they wouldn't know where to look, Castle couldn't help thinking of worst case scenarios. He couldn't think of a way to cheat death this time, he couldn't think of a single silver lining- not even for Beckett. The knowledge that Beckett looked to him for comfort made him happy, or at least it was until he realised he couldn't give her any.

Together, they had lowered themselves against the side of the freezer. As Kate shivered next to him, Castle hadn't cared about what it meant, or if she would be angry. He surrounded her with his arms, wishing that he could give all his warmth to her. He had tried to work his lips to express the guilt that was engulfing him as they sat there in silence. If it weren't for him, she wouldn't be inches away from death. However she wouldn't hear of it and actually comforted him. He wished that it was amongst different circumstances as she turned into his body and reached towards his face, wished that his face wasn't that numb that he couldn't feel Beckett's hand caress his cheek. But then he remembered that if they weren't freezing to death, there was zero chance of that ever happening and his heart sunk again.

Then, he supposed that there was still hope in his heart, because he could have sworn she was about to say that she loved him, before her eyes were closing, and her hand fell from his face. That was another of the scariest moments of his life, when he thought he was going to lose Kate forever. He hadn't been able to gather the strength to do anything but beg with her immobile form before he too was slipping into unconsciousness.

Beckett was his first thought as he had awoken, disorientated. He had been so happy to see her alive that he considered her being in Josh's arms instead of his a small price to pay, however badly it cut him up inside as a result, as he wished that it was her arms she was in.

However, very soon after, they were standing right in front of a dirty bomb as it counted down to zero in front of their eyes, with nothing they could do. The panic in Beckett's voice as she talked to Fallon, trying to sound in control, and the helplessness in Fallon's voice as he apologised when there was nothing he could do had made him panic even more. Two of the most in control people he knew were admitting defeat. He had been anxiously examining the bomb while the other two had been talking. He didn't know what he had been looking for, a helpful 'OFF' switch perhaps. As he held Beckett's hand in his, and stared into her eyes, he knew he loved her and had to do something. He looked at Beckett for what he had thought would probably be the last time, and then turned around and did the first thing he could think of. He yanked all the wires out, before flinching for the explosion.

The next few moments were the best of his life so far. Adrenaline coursed through him as he hugged Beckett tightly to him in the street, surrounded by people living their lives with no idea how close they had come to death. He never wanted to let go, he wanted Beckett to remain in his arms forever, but he knew he had to. Just like he had to walk away at the precinct, leaving her in Dr. Motorcycle Boy's arms, wishing beyond hope that it was his arms she was in.

A sudden knocking at the door woke him out of his musings. He had called Alexis and Martha to tell them everything was ok, and they were set to come back tomorrow. Kate would be with Josh no doubt, so he was puzzled as to whom it could be. Slowly he got up and walked to the door.

If you guys liked it please review and hopefully another chapter will be up soon:)