Author's note: First of all, I did promise dick doodles.
You have to admit a black spandex body suit and cat ears is bound to get some kind of attention from someone. Plus something about Adrien-the insecurity, the inability to express himself, the love of anonymity his mask brings-brings a closet vibe to his character. The two person love square is probably the only thing keeping Cat Noir from a secret affair with a sexy but misunderstood bad boy.
If someone wants to use that as a prompt, feel free.
Since Adrien signed posters before, he tried to make his handwriting different when he was Cat Noir. He was too busy carefully scrawling the N to pay attention to what this boy named Henry was saying.
"I'm sorry, what was that?"
"Are you bi?"
Cat Noir's hand slipped, and the N became a check mark. He stared at the boy, with his dark brown curls and dark blue jacket. He looked cute, like one of those American pop stars.
"What?"
For a second he wondered if he misheard him. The street fair he and Ladybug were invited to was loud. Children ran around yelling and a local band was strumming a love song. Maybe Henry said something else. But the bright blush on pale cheeks told him he heard right.
"I know you and Ladybug are a thing. But I was wondering, I mean, I know other people are wondering, if maybe you, you liked boys, too? And if you were, maybe, would you ever consider dating a guy?"
His amber eyes darted everywhere but Cat Noir's face, then sucked in his bottom lip.
"Um, I mean, I don't really know. But I'm sort of seeing someone anyway." Cat Noir rubbed the back of his head. He honestly didn't know if he liked guys. He considered it a moot point because he had a girlfriend.
"I'm sorry."
"No! Don't be sorry. I'm flattered, really." And he was. People only seemed to be into Adrien. It was nice that someone fell for his excellent sense of humor for once.
The boy took his autograph and fled. Cat Noir went back to carefully writing his name. He wouldn't have given the encounter-or questioning his sexuality-another thought.
He wouldn't have given them another thought, but as luck would have it, the next day the class had an impromptu discussion on bisexuality. Although "discussion" might have been pushing it.
Miss Bustier was talking about an upcoming production of Romeo and Juliet. Adrien's mind wandered. And his pen.
Nino snickered when he saw the little penis in the corner of his notebook. The shaft was shaped more like an egg, and the two balls were filled in with smiley faces.
"Is the drawn to scale?"
"Ask Marinette."
A wad of paper that hit the back of his head told him that his girlfriend was not amused. He grinned sheepishly. Alya snickered as Marinette blushed.
Suddenly everyone turned at the sound of a chair falling over. Nathaniel was lying on his back on the floor. Kim held up a blue, pink and purple bracelet.
"Give that back!"
Kim dangled the keychain from the tips of his fingers. "You think no one knows what this means?"
"It was a gift!"
"From who? Your boyfriend?"
Miss Bustier's eyes narrowed. "Kim, give back Nathaniel's keychain!"
Kim tossed the keychain on the floor. "Just how many gay people are in this class?" He sat back in his chair as Nathaniel ran out of homeroom with a mumbled "bathroom" as his only response.
Miss Bustier set her chalk down. "I think it's time for a discussion. Who knows what the colors pink, blue and purple symbolize?" Adrien had no idea.
"The bisexual flag?" Rose asked.
"Correct."
"Of course you would know," Chloe said.
"My dad said guys aren't bisexual," Ivan said. "They're just too scared to admit they're gay."
"I heard they're all whores," Kim said as he leaned back in his chair. Juleka gave him the middle finger.
Adrien winced. He was too scared to turn around to see what Marinette thought of that.
"Bisexual people do exist, Ivan. Unfortunately, we don't have a lot of time to discuss it, but next semester your health teacher can explain this better than I could. Until then, please be respectful of your classmates. Class dismissed."
Adrien closed his notebook. He didn't want to look at his dick doodle anymore. He was scared it seemed gay.
In the school auditorium, Henry flipped through his copy of Shakespeare's works. A sword sat at his feet. He hoped he would get to play Mercutio. He had all the best lines.
He wondered if Cat Noir knew how to fence. He looked like he did, with the way he used his baton. Henry shook his head and sighed. His mother had said sometimes it wasn't meant to be. There would be other boys. Someday.
Henry didn't notice the black butterfly until it was too late.
"Romeo, I am Hawk Moth. Ladybug has stolen your love away from you. Bring me the Miraculouses, and I'll make sure you and Cat Noir are together forever."
"Yes, Hawk Moth."
During lunch, Marinette was having soup when her mother came in and turned on the TV.
"An akuma named Romeo is rampaging near the College Dupont, turning people to stone. Citizens are advised to remain indoors." A short clip of a boy dressed in a Renaissance outfit laughing manically played. Then it switched to traffic reports.
"I guess you're not going back to school this afternoon," her mother said.
"More time to do my homework!" Marinette kissed her mother's cheek, then darted up to her room.
"Tikki, spots on!"
In minutes Ladybug arrived two blocks away from the school. Over turned cars and petrified people lined the street. Cat Noir was already there, running frantically away from the akuma victim.
"Ladybug!" The boy jumped in the air and landed in front of her, his black cape following him like a shadow.
"I am Romeo. And your Juliet is mine!"
"My what?"
"He means me!" Cat Noir threw his batons at him. Romeo ducked.
"One moment, my love. I just need to defend your honor." A purple blast fired from the sword. Ladybug cartwheeled to the sidewalk.
"I'm a superhero! I already have plenty honor!"
Cat Noir flipped through the air. Ladybug swung her yo-yo. Romeo jumped away, allowing Cat Noir to retrieve his batons. Ladybug grabbed Cat Noir's arm and they retreated to the rooftops.
"I think someone has an admirer," Ladybug said. She expected some joke about being irresistible, but Cat Noir only frowned.
"His name is Henry. He asked me out yesterday at the street fair."
"Well, it looks like someone doesn't handle rejection well. Also, what's with turning people into stone? That's not in Shakespeare."
He shrugged. "Maybe Hawk Moth is running out of ideas."
They ducked behind a chimney across the street from the school. Romeo cackled not too far away.
"Hide all you want, Ladybug. You can't stop me from seducing your love."
"It's like the opposite of those camps," Ladybug said as she rolled her eyes. She then noticed Cat Noir wince.
"What is it?"
"I, uh, nothing. Let's get the akuma."
Ladybug didn't like the looks of that. She remembered what he told Alya during his interview, about his depression. She hoped Cat Noir was okay.
The sound of shattering glass and screams snapped her out of her thoughts. Romeo must have entered the school. The heroes jumped through an open window to the second floor, near their own classroom. Students ran past them, terrified.
Chloe ran to the front door. "Help!" Then she was frozen, her purse falling to the floor as her expression of fear hardened to stone. It wouldn't look out of place in Medusa's garden. Ladybug shivered. She hoped the people weren't conscious as they were frozen. Knowing how villains and their minions never remember anything, she doubted the statues were awake. She hoped.
Romeo blasted his sword at them. They both dove down, landing superhero style on the ground floor. Then they leapt out of the way as Romeo turned the staircase behind them into a stone staircase.
"You can't just kill me and expect Cat Noir to run into your arms! He doesn't even like guys."
Romeo smirked. "Oh really? Looks like you don't know your boyfriend as well as you think you do."
"You're lying!" Cat Noir lunged at him. Romeo did a back flip and laughed.
"Am I?"
Romeo blasted at her. Ladybug and Cat Noir ran into a nearby empty classroom.
"We have to figure out a way to-" Cat Noir stopped as Ladybug gave him a look.
"Cat Noir, what's he talking about?"
"I mean, um, well, I don't know. I know I love you, but, I think I might be. . ." His face turned red.
"Oh, kitty."
"After all that stuff in class today, I freaked out. I'm not gay and I would never cheat on you. I swear. I just, I don't know. . .I might be bi."
Ladybug threw her arms around his neck. "Oh mon Cheri." She almost gave a sigh of relief because this was nothing compared to all the scenarios that ran through her head. He hugged her tightly.
"Don't listen to anything any of them said today. It's okay."
"Really?"
"Really. You're my hero, no matter what."
Cat Noir buried his nose in her hair. "I love you, Ladybug."
"I love you too, Cat Noir."
The door was kicked open. Romeo held his sword up.
"He's mine!"
The heroes jumped out and open window to the main hall of the school. Better to fight in open spaces. Romeo swooped down. He blasted his sword at a student upstairs.
"Nathaniel!"
Before Ladybug could act, Kim tackled Nathaniel just in time. They both fell to the floor as the door turned to stone.
"I will turn this whole school into stone unless I am united with my beloved."
Cat Noir snorted. "I prefer flowers."
Ladybug giggled, not at the joke but because Cat Noir was back to his usual self. He charged at his admirer with his baton, parrying as he had been taught. Unfortunately, Romeo appeared to be a skilled swordsman.
"Lucky charm!"
A red water bottle fell into her hand.
"Oh yeah, I remember that scene from the play. The part where Romeo drowns himself." Cat Noir blocked Romeo's blow.
"Cat Noir, the staircase!"
"Cataclysm!"
Cat Noir jumped up and hit the green staircase with his black mist. It collapsed, forcing Romeo to run forward. Right into a puddle of water.
"Ah!" Romeo fell, his sword, flying out of his hand. Ladybug caught it.
"No more evil doing for you little akuma." She hit the floor with the sword. It shattered.
"Time to de-evilize!" She captured the purple butterfly, then released it white and pure.
"Miraculous Ladybug!"
As soon as Henry was de-evilized, Ladybug held out her arm for their standard fist bump. Cat Noir ran like a cat on a hot tin roof towards Nathaniel and Kim.
"What are you doing?!"
Cat Noir picked up Nathaniel like a wrestler holding up his belt. He ran back to Henry, who had just gotten off the ground. Without so much as a warning, Cat Noir chucked Nathaniel straight at Henry, knocking him down again. Then Cat Noir grabbed Ladybug's wrist and dragged her away.
They ran across roof tops for a minute before ducking into an alleyway and transformed back.
Marinette threw up her hands in frustration.
"What the hell was that?"
"Match making." Adrien grinned, obviously pleased with himself.
"Match making?! That's what you call match making?"
"Marinette, how did we first me?"
"What?"
"Answer the question."
"We fought our first akuma together."
"But more than that. You crashed into me."
"That's a coincidence."
"Alya and Nino. They didn't start dating until you threw them in a cage together for their safety."
"Another coincidence. Besides, I fell in love with you when-"
A loud clap of thunder echoed into the night. The storm they predicted earlier was on its way. Adrien stretched his arms over his head.
"You were saying, Princess?"
"This means nothing."
"Uh huh. I guess we'll see at school, then."
She shook her head. "Well I have to go finish my lunch. I think we still have classes this afternoon."
Adrien pulled her waist to him. He kissed her, a soft, lingering kiss that left her blushing.
"I love you Adrien," she said.
"I love you too, Marinette."
The next day, Nathaniel came to school wearing a familiar dark blue jacket. If anyone happened to peer over his shoulder before school -like Adrien did-they would have seen a drawing of a boy with brown hair and a sword in his hand, ready to defend a castle.
Adrien sauntered over to his girlfriend's desk. He beamed, very pleased with himself. Marinette sighed.
"Okay, you were right."
"I know."
"I know you know." She pulled out her notebook. "What am I going to do with you?"
He pulled out his own notebook and flipped to the dick doodle he drew yesterday. "I have an idea."
Author's other note: Once again, this was sappier than I had planned. What can I say, these two kids bring out the romantic in me. *squishes feelings back into the locked box where they belong*