Rainy Mondays and Dead Tuesdays
It is raining outside. Dino notices this but he doesn't care much for the vicious pitter pattering of icy droplets on his umbrella. The sky is gray and the clouds hang depressingly low and there's a breeze coming from the salty sea in some far off country.
Today the world is gray, kind of like Kyouya.
Dino's eyes travel to his side and he admires the sight, of Kyouya, grown Kyouya, mature Kyouya. Pretty damp hair sticking to his barely pink cheeks, a sign of his humanity. Something Kyouya would like to forget. Kyouya has become increasingly dangerous with each day, a perfect mafioso, a perfect killing machine. Dino's not sure if this is a good thing.
Kyouya has made a name for himself in this world, but in this world, Dino knows that it is not a good thing. It is good for Kyouya to be feared, it is not good for Kyouya to be targeted. It is good for Kyouya to be strong, but the stronger he is the stronger he must grow. And there is nothing else he can teach this boy, he stopped teaching him a long time ago.
-- Dino is everywhere that Kyouya is, in Japan, in Italy. So he can see gray eyes and ebony locks. So he can see the red on his white shirt and wonder whose blood it is.
Because Dino is afraid, so very afraid, that when he finally musters up the courage to reach the other boy he will be gone, flying away in the clear blue—no, the gloomy gray sky, that this world is so well known for.
--
The air smells like rain. The air smells like the freshness that comes after rain. Dino enjoys this smell; it's kind of calming. Like something has been reborn—like they can be reborn. Even if it's only a little bit, Dino would like to think that maybe he has a chance.
Kyouya is irritated because they have to share a room. But there was nothing they could do—there was simply no more room, so the hotel manager said. Dino didn't understand what was so bad about sharing a room. Kyouya told him to sleep on the floor.
Dino lies awake on the sofa as he breathes in fresh rain and cool air and he can't fall asleep. He shuts his eyes and thinks of Kyouya in the bed somewhere in this room and he wonders if he's lying awake as well.
--
Kyouya knows and that is the scariest part. Kyouya knows that Dino doesn't have the rest of his life to live. Dino only has as much time as Millefiore will allow him. Kyouya knows.
Dino wonders briefly what Kyouya thinks of this—and then he remembers that Kyouya probably doesn't care. If anything, he would probably reach for his tonfa and strike, because Kyouya always said he'd be the one to kill Dino.
That is, if Kyouya cares at all.
--
Dino wakes up with a start, and notices that the air around him is cold. He notices that it smells like rain and that it smells like blood and that it smells like Kyouya.
He sits up and in the gleaming mirror there is the silhouette of Kyouya. Dino can't tell if tonight he is a man or a boy. The moonlight makes him so much younger than he really is—illuminates his milky skin and dark eyes and he looks so beautiful Dino can't tear his eyes away.
"Kyouya…" He murmurs unconsciously, and Kyouya turns to meet his eyes.
Dino thinks tonight would be a good night.
He thinks this before Kyouya opens his mouth and speaks, soft voice but hard words.
"At this rate you're not going to live very long." He says, and Dino swallows his heart.
"Kyouya I—"
"Sawada wanted to talk to you." He continues, "Before he died." And Dino wonders how Kyouya can be so blunt.
"Kyouya—"
"What are you going to do?" And he stops and waits for Dino's answer but Dino doesn't always have one. Kyouya seems to be asking Dino what the meaning of life is, and Dino doesn't know the answer. The meaning of life—Dino's meaning of life is Kyouya. All he wants is to be able to take his hand and run away from everything. But to where, Dino, to where?
"I—Kyouya I'm sorry." Dino stammers and looks down at his trembling hands. "I'm sorry, Kyouya, but I think I—"
--The two of them were never real.
"It's fine." Says Kyouya. Dino looks into the face of his too young but too old pupil and his vision becomes blurry but he doesn't know why. But Kyouya knows, Kyouya always knows. Behind this gloomy gray boy are fireworks of red and orange and yellow and a blast of hot air and it hurts, but not as much as his heart does.
Dino is too late, he does not reach him. He hears bang bang bang and thud thud thud and he can't reach him, he is too late, too late, too late. Crashing and burning and falling and screaming and shots and explosions ringing in his ears, but most of all, breaking breaking breaking. It hurts, Kyouya, it hurts.
Dino screams but he cannot save him.
a/n; written before i started suffering from post con depression (fanime); but anyway this fits my mood now. GRAY. XD;
also agonizing over a certain paragraph. i hate not being able to make it sound nice. gah.
i have many angsty D18 plot bunnies hopping around in my head. BEWARE!!