It hurts.
It hurts so much you know.
With everyone and I mean everyone looks down on you. Facing everything alone with nobody to lend a shoulder to cry on.
Why, why.. WHY….!
Leaving me alone to face the world. Did I make the right decision? What have I done wrong in life?
Should I just end it? If not…
Can I face this alone? Please GOD help me?
Am I trying too hard to fit in? or is it because of how I look?
Stop… just stop.. just STOP…
Can't you see…
I was hurting inside. I was hurting inside.. Crying in the bathroom or crying myself to sleep at night.. nobody notice..
Nobody at all...
It hurts…
Faking smile everyday hurts..
Making sure everyone is happy except oneself hurts,,
Can't tell anyone about this problem hurts..
It hurts..
Please.. anyone.. I mean anyone at all.. help me.. please..
BREAK
"You're my best friend Luce"
"Thanks Luce"
"Awww.. come on Luce! You gotta come to my game tonight! Pleaseee..!"
"Luce..I gonna tell you a secret so you can't tell anyone and I mean anyone not even happy okay! ….. I like Lisanna"
"Luce! Guess what! Guess what..! Lisanna said yes! I finally ask her out just like you told me too."
"Luce.. This is my girlfriend Lisanna.. Lisanna… This is my best friend in the world. Luce.."
"Sorry.. I can' spend time with you Lucy.. Lisanna want to go on a date today."
"Ermmm.. sorry Lucy maybe next time..Maybe next time.. I promise.."
"So I know we're suppose to spend today together today but Lisanna and I have date today."
" I promise next time for sure.."
"Lucy.. Sorry I forgot about your birthday but I did bought you a present.. Lisanna helped me pick it… you gonna love it..
"Help me,, please Luce.. I need help…I don't know what to pick here… Help me pick a ring for Lisanna.."
"I'm gonna marry Lisanna."
"What do mean.. You don't wanna help me.. Luce.. come on.. you're my best friend…."
"Why are you angry.. I just ask to help me find a ring for Lisanna…Fine! If you don't want to help your best friend just say so… You don't have to be mean about it... Bye.."
BREAK
I wasn't bullied or anything but those words you said without know that you're hurting me kills me. But the next day.. you'll see me smiling and being happy not knowing I'm dying inside.
Cause that's just me.. making sure everyone is happy including you except myself.
"Goodbye minna.." I looked back one last time before I boarded the plane..