Summary: After their breakup, Magnus and Alec both just want to move on. But when outright war between Jonathan and the rest of the Shadow World breaks out, the two might have to put their differences aside in order to keep the ones they love, and each other, alive.
A/N: So this takes place directly after City of Lost Souls. It's more or less an alternative to City of Heavenly Fire. Obviously, it's Malec-centric. Apart from that, there isn't much else to tell you. So without further ado, I present:
All We Know Is Falling
Chapter 1: All We Know
Alec Lightwood had never been the best when it came to emotions and feelings. That may have had something to do with the fact that he had never in his lifetime felt so heartbroken and devastated. Sure, he and Jace had argued and fought before, but they'd always made up in the end. This, however, felt so...final.
Alec turned to walk back home, but as he left the station, he found himself looking around, waiting, almost hoping that Magnus would appear in front of him and tell him that they could work this out, that they just needed to take time to fix these issues. Alec waited at the top of the stairs for the longest of times, heart pounding uneasily in his chest.
This was how long it took before he realized that Magnus really was gone. And that he didn't plan on coming back. Alec had never really cried before, except when Max died. But that evening, while he made the slow, lonely walk back to the Institute, he did cry. And when he got home, he brushed past Jace and the rest of his family, bypassing all of their questions, and locked himself in his room.
He cried for the rest of that night, refusing to speak to anyone or come out for dinner when his mother asked if he'd like anything.
He did the same thing the next day, only offering a teary sounding "I don't want to talk about it, Isabelle!" When she came to bang on the door and ask him what was wrong.
Eventually, Jace and Isabelle started texting him. So he did the only natural thing. He turned off his phone.
This went on about two days before Alec guessed word had gotten around about his and Magnus's breakup. He only knew that because Isabelle had taken to sitting outside the room to comfort him, since he wouldn't let her or anyone else in.
After the third day, he simply stopped answering their questions all together, only making the occasional grunt when Jace asked in a rather concerned tone if he was still alive.
"You haven't eaten in almost a week," Jace called, giving another light knock at the door.
"And I don't plan on it," Alec grumbled back, burrowing back under the covers with the scarf Magnus had given him all those months ago. Strangely enough, it still smelled like his boyfriend.
Ex boyfriend, his mind had the audacity to remind him, and he spent the rest of that day curled in a ball of defeat in his bed.
He stopped being a hermit after about a week, at least partially. He came out for meals, but avoided general conversation, especially if it seemed like it was leading back to Magnus. Magnus Bane was, after all, the last thing he wanted to discuss now or ever again.
He'd screwed up with Magnus so badly. And he knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that there was nothing he could do to fix what he'd broken.
If there was one thing that Alec knew, it was that Magnus would never want to take him back ever again. Not after the shit he'd pulled with Camille.
So he avoided any conversation about his ex. After all, that was the only way he knew he'd be able to cope: by pretending there was no problem, and that he was fine.
It was, Alec thought, putting on his mask of indifference as he went to join his family for dinner, the best course of action he could ever take.