I don't usually string everything together, but this time I am.
Day One: Travel
Her nose was blocked with snot and her face burned from where the tears had streaked and her hands had rubbed her cheeks raw. Any ugly noise broke from her lips as she struggled to breath and contain her whimpers. She had attempted to throw her hair up into a messy bun, but due to her short hair it was just a tiny pompom. Most of her hair had slipped out and was plastered to her cheeks. Even though Anzu hated the itchy feeling of her face, she didn't move from her spot on her bed.
The girl was wrapped in her comforter as she burrowed deeper into her pillows. The ship they travelled on rocked gently atop the waves but did nothing to lure her to sleep. The white pillowcases were probably ruined from her mascara, tears, and snot running onto them. She was too hot under the blanket in the Egyptian night and her tee and sleep shorts clung to her skin from sweat.
She knew she should get up and clean herself up, but she just couldn't. Anzu knew that as soon as she flicked on the harsh light in her room, she would have to face the reality. That he was really, truly gone. That the man she had grown to love was never coming back.
That she had never gotten to tell him the truth.
But, if she stayed cuddled in her burrow of despair, it was easy to pretend she had had another nightmare. She always had nightmares about him leaving. About him walking away from her into the darkness of the unknown without so much as a goodbye. She had always associated him with the dark, so it was fitting that he was disappear into a black void.
Another round of tears came.
Would they ever stop? Surely that had too. There was no way her body could keep producing them at this rate. She needed to get a glass of water or wash her face.
Her mind whirled back to the prospect of getting up and facing the truth. Her stomach rolled unpleasantly. If she turned on the light, that painful first flash of the bulb would remind her of that dazzling brightness that had taken him away. She wished it had been the darkness like in her nightmares. It was easy and normal to be afraid of the dark. But the light? How could she explain that without sounding crazy?
She curled tighter on herself and let loose another whimper. How long until she would be forced to deal with it? At some point, she would have to get up and see her friends. She would have to fly home and go to school. Her heart squeezed painfully at the thought of going to another dueling match. Could she even do that? Could she sit in the stands and cheer for Yugi?
Of course, she would. She did love Yugi. It had taken her a long time to realize it, but her feelings for Yugi were more than mere friendship. And she had known for a long time that he liked her. She supposed that the natural path her life would take would be with Yugi. Maybe once she came back from New York? But not now. It would be unfair to Yugi to try to go for a relationship right now when her heart bled for…for him.
She winced. Anzu had wanted to know his name so bad. And now that she knew it, she could not bring herself to say or even think it. She had always daydreamed about loving sighs and sweet whispers of his real name. And she would never get those moments. He would never cradle her face in his broad hands and delicately kiss her lips while she murmured his name.
The soft knock on her door popped the protective cocoon she had wrapped her thoughts in. Her head poked out of the blanket nest. She didn't trust her voice, but she knew who was on the other side of the cheap hotel standard door. And she knew he would enter without her blessing tonight.
As the door creaked open and confirmed her thoughts, she hissed in discomfort as the hallway light burned her eyes. Yugi quickly entered and shut the door. Instead of his usual pajamas, Anzu could make out that he wore a white tank and blue cotton shorts in the moment she had the offensive light to guide her. The boy slowly approached the bed and crawled in. She lifted the heavy blanket and he joined her in the musky heat of her nest. The small boy didn't even grimace or make a comment about how nasty her skin or pillows felt. He burrowed next to her and wrapped his arms around her.
Anzu murmured in content and pulled him closer. Within a few moments, the boy beside her was snoring lightly. The girl hummed again and placed her head under his chin, her ear right against his heart. The gentle knocking of it reminded her that she was not alone in her grief. That this sweet, kind boy understood.
Despite the fact Yugi had to be in more pain than she was, he had come to her. Her had sought her out. She chewed her bottom lip thoughtfully. Yugi was stronger than she would ever be.
His stifling heat burned her flesh, but she held tight. And she would never let him go, she swore. Because as the gentle thrumming of his heart lulled her to sleep at last, she was reaffirmed in her thought that she did love this boy. And no matter where her life took her, she knew she would come back to him.