Hi!! First upload ever! I'm hoping the you guys and girls will enjoy reading this new original story! This story is written by myself and NerdySkeleton, my best friend! We had a ton of fun writing the first chapter however it took us a very VERY long time!! We will up date as quickly as possible, which will probably not be very frequent, sorry!!! Busy teens ya know, all that homework!! :( Anyways hope you enjoy this story!

Yaaay! New story!!

(*THIS IS NOT IT!!!*)

There once was a stupid skeleton name Smugdutty. His girlfriend, Evinka, was an ugly brunette. The couple was jealous of another couple. The couple was vampires. Their names were Edward and Bella. Edward and Bella were the heart throbs of many teens. But there were two girls. They loved Smugdutty and Evinka. Smugdutty and Evinka were so mad that they stopped eating and died. The two girls were so upset they died. Edward and Bella in the end still had all the fans.

THE END

Just kidding! :D (Written by our crazy, weird, Skulduggery-hating friend!)

This is really it!

"You're being reassigned to America," Guild said sternly.

"A-A-America?" twenty-one year old Valkyrie shrieked. "May I ask why?"

"Yes, America," Guild said again, losing his patience. "It's only temporary and the American Sanctuary requested you two along with Miss Tanith Low and Mr. Ghastly Bespoke. And while you're there you'll be able to visit the fifty states and different landmarks."

"So," Valkyrie growled, "we're going to go to America, see the Sanctuary there, and then just traipse around for no reason?!"

"Not exactly. You are to check out each of the fifty states and see if there are any magical incidents that could disturb any civilians. They need to be taken care of."

Valkyrie frowned. "Why can't the American Sanctuary take care of it themselves?"

"Because they aren't as big. When you arrive there, there will be two lovely ladies to give you further information."

Valkyrie groaned. "There is no way anyone will make me go to America."

"Valkyrie," Skulduggery Pleasant said, "we're going to go."

"You've barely said anything this whole conversation! You're opinion does not count."

"I think it does seeing in how I am your mentor."

"In case you haven't noticed, Skulduggery, I'm 96 years old. I can make decisions by myself!" she argued. "You can't convince me to go to America."

"I think you'd really like it though," the skeleton said slyly. "There's a lot of different things there and I'm sure you'd have fun."

"Oh whatever. You're a bad persuader." Valkyrie huffed and crossed her arms.

"We can go see Disneyworld…"

Her head whipped around and she glared at him. "Give me three days to consider."

"Good," Guild exclaimed. "The plane leaves on Thursday. You'll have until then." He gave a curt nod, and swept out of the Sanctuary room. Valkyrie turned and glared harder at Skulduggery.

"I hate you," she said.

"You've told me that many times. I'm glad you've remained true," Skulduggery muttered and guided her away and out of the room.

"How do we know it's them?" Valkyrie asked loudly over the bustle of the people in the Philadelphia airport. They had just landed in America and were looking for the "lovely ladies" Guild had said would be there.

Skulduggery shrugged. "We'll know when we see them," he said. "Guild told me they'd be waiting by that magical-bag-spinny-thing-of-wonder."

Valkyrie blinked. "You mean the baggage claim?!"

"Yes!"

"Skulduggery, you are such an idiot."

"No, I just have a better way of describing things."

Valkyrie sighed. The Philadelphia airport was such a dirty place in Valkyrie's opinion. She stopped at a map to look for the baggage claim. Just then, she heard a honk from behind her. She turned slowly and saw Skulduggery driving a baggage cart.

Her mouth hung open.

"I found a magical airport car!" he said excitedly.

"Skulduggery," she growled, "that is for staff and elderly only.

He tilted his head. "Technically I am elderly…And so are you!"

"I am not elderly!"

Skulduggery looked at her and sighed. He opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off.

"Excuse me? Are you with the Irish Sanctuary?" a woman, about Valkyrie's age asked.

"You guys better be them. We've been here since 8 this morning and I am so cranky I could strangle you all," a woman with dark brown hair, still about Valkyrie's age said.

"Yes, we are," Skulduggery answered slowly.

Valkyrie smirked. "He couldn't figure out how to board a plane."

"There were hundreds of flights! How was I supposed to know which one to board?"

"That's why you have a ticket! We could have asked a flight attendant, but you scared them all off!"

"No, they just couldn't see my charms," he smugly replied.

"Yes because you have so many, Skulduggery," Valkyrie smirked.

"I'm sorry," Polite Girl said, "but we do need to get a move on. We are a time limit."

"Yes! Move, move, move!" Cranky Girl shouted. "Vamoose!" She turned and marched away while Polite Girl rolled her eyes and followed.

Skulduggery looked over at Valkyrie. "We should get going then," he muttered, getting into serious mode. Valkyrie picked up her bags and followed Skulduggery and the two ladies out to the crowded parking lot.

"Our driver should be around here momentarily," Polite Girl smiled.

"If he hasn't crashed the car yet," Cranky Girl muttered under her breath.

"Oh geez, you must be wondering who we are. I'm Morgana Klavier," Polite Girl grinned. "And this is my best friend and associate Yvette Quick." She pointed to Cranky Girl, who was oblivious to what Morgana was saying. She was looking out at the parking lot.

"My God where is he?" she shouted to herself.

"I'm sure he just got stuck in traffic…" Morgana muttered. But just then, a white Porsche pulled up less than three inches from the girl's toes.

"I'm here!" a happy voice said from inside.

"I'm gonna kill him! I'm gonna kill him!" Yvette shouted. The driver's side door opened and a black and white haired man stepped out. He was decked out in black leather and was wearing sunglasses that reminded Valkyrie of Billy-Ray Sanguine.

"Hey guys!" he grinned. "Right on time, huh?" He had a Brooklyn accent.

"Actually you're fifty seconds late," Yvette said darkly.

"Why can I never make you happy, Yvette?!" he whined loudly.

"Because you're you," she argued. "Alright hop in, ya'll!"

"Here," Morgana smiled, "you can put your luggage in the back." She walked over and popped open the trunk. Skulduggery followed Morgana, while Valkyrie stood still.

"I swear he reminds me so much of Fletcher," she muttered and then followed Morgana and Skulduggery.

They all got into the car; with Skulduggery in the passenger's seat beside the weird guy. Valkyrie squished in between Morgana and Yvette.

"So…are you ready?" the man smiled. He pulled away from the curb carelessly, going about ten miles over the speed limit.

An awkward silence followed.

"So…" the boy said. "You're Irish and here to help us?"

"No Malikah! They're Chinese and here to destroy the Sanctuary!" Yvette replied sarcastically.

The car came to an immediate stop.

"What are we doing with them?" he shouted. "Get them out of the car! I'll save you Morgana!"

"Malikah…" Morgana sighed in frustration, "drive."

"NO!" Suddenly there was a rush of air in the car. "I hate it when you do that." He whimpered and started driving again.

"So you're an elemental then, Morgana," Valkyrie said casually.

"Yup!" she grinned.

"And you're…a necromancer?" she asked Yvette. They all heard Skulduggery grumble something and sigh in frustration.

"Got a problem with that, Mr. Bones? Did a necromancer kill your dog?"

"I hate dogs," he sighed. Yvette laughed and turned to Valkyrie.

"But yeah, I'm a necromancer." She pulled her right sleeve up, revealing a black bangle with shadows curling from it.

"So…I heard you're a skeleton," the man said.

"Yes, Skulduggery Pleasant."

"Malikah Knight." He took his hands off the steering wheel to shake the skeleton's hand.

"Malikah! God! Keep your hands on the wheel!!" Yvette screamed.

"Are those two mental?" Valkyrie asked, afraid of the answer.

"No, they've just known each other for way too long," Morgana replied.

Valkyrie smirked and looked over at Skulduggery. These three reminded her of her friends back in Ireland.

"How close are we to the Pennsylvania Sanctuary then?" Skulduggery asked.

"We should be about five minutes away," Yvette responded lazily.

Another awkward silence.

"Malikah, what magic do you study?"

"Well," he grinned and took his hands off the wheel to turn and face Valkyrie, "I'm an-"

Yvette cut him off. "I swear to God if you take your hands off that wheel one more time I will kick you so hard in the balls."

Malikah whipped around and steered the car. "I'm an adept so…I can pass through walls."

"Oh neat. Do you fight at all?"

"I have really sharp nails, like that superhero."

"Wolfman or something? Valkyrie mumbled.

"It was either Kitty Boy or Puppy Boy," Morgana added.

The awkward silence continued.

"So…Is this your first time in America?"

"Unfortunately, yes," Valkyrie groaned.

"What are you? Anti-American?" Morgana smirked.

"No," Skulduggery intervened. "She just wants to get to Disneyworld."

"As magical as a place Disneyworld is, we're here," Malikah smiled widely and pulled the Porsche up to a curb that was in front of a big white building with the words "The Franklin Institute" writing across it.

"I wish our Sanctuary was this pretty…"

Hey guys! NerdySkeleton here! Moecat433 and I decided to do this story a while ago, but school and actual life took over for us. So, we're co-writing this story together and she'll be uploading it to her account. So yeah. I'm so excited for this :D

PS--

If you want anymore weird Skulduggery P. stories from our Anti-SP friend, please leave in review!! :) :)

PSS--

Hope you enjoyed it and R & R!

PSSS--

Happy Halloween~ :D