A/N: This one's a little more light-hearted than my previous efforts, and is my first attempt at writing humour. For a bit of context, Jemima is the secretary, and Jennyanydots, Jellylorum, and Quaxo are the various Doctors. Also, it changes perspective from third person to first person. Just a head's up. Enjoy! Or don't. It's your call, really.

It was a quiet day, the first one in Quaxo's recent memory. He noted that it was the first time since the last Jellicle Ball that he could find the time to just sit back and think to himself. But what to think about? Jemima had been asking him about his mate a lot, and he was tired of the whole "Asexual Reproduction" story. He decided he'd think about Queens then.

Let's see here...Bombalurina's recently single, but who knows how long that'll last, Jem's kinda cute, RIGHT, she isn't interested in toms, Etcetera can't think about anything or anyone who isn't Tugger...Wait. Who said my mate had to be a queen? I could stand being mated to Tugger. Rawr. Nah, I'm far too busy to experiment with my sexuality. You know who I could stand to see a lot more of, is T...

Suddenly, as if on cue, Mungojerrie burst through the door and into his office, hopping on one foot, and plummeted to the floor with a resounding "Thud".

"Ah, if it isn't my least favourite patient, Mungojerrie!" Quaxo noted, in his usual cheery tone.

"Oi! Haffsum respeck, woudja? Not only am I a payin' custama, but halfa' the staff 'ere are in my family!"

"Jem, do you care if I 'respeck' your brother?" Quaxo asked, not ceasing to smile for a second.

"Nope" she replied, without looking up.

Quaxo gave him a smug grin, and continued. "So anyways, what brings you here? You surely aren't here for the company."

"Well, y'see, yesserday I was jus', ah, moindin' my own buisness, in a forest, Rumples wazzere, ask her, and then suddenly POW! Shattered glass. Tons of it. Outah' bleedin' nowhere. Tha's exackly what 'appened."

"Exactly what appened. Right. So if I asked you where you were yesterday, would you tell me you had broken glass stuck in your foot?"

"Quit makin' funna moi accent! And...yes...that's exackly the prollem." he admitted sheepishly.

"Alright, I'll go get Jenny to take a look at it."

Contrary to Quaxo's plan, Mungojerrie didn't seem to quiet down once his Mother, Jenny took over.

"Mum! Quaxo was makin' funna moi accent!"

"Oh, I'm sorry dear. I'll have to have a talk with him about that, he's beginning to drive away patients. Did you know that Gus has stopped coming by to pick up his palsy medication? It's a good thing his daughter works here, or he wouldn't be able to move his hands at all! Now let's have a look at that foot..."

He propped up the wounded limb on the hospital bed, revealing a wound that was a lot more green than he remembered.

"My goodness! How did that happen?"

"Well, yesserday, while I was walking with Rumples, I acciden'ly stepped in broken glass, and I din't wan' you worried, so I just sorta tried to lick it clean, but that din't work." He stuck out his mildly scratched tongue, which may have been augmenting his usual accent. "An' then this mornin' i'was all green loike this."

"Oh my. If that's infected, we might need to keep you here for a while. I'm slightly concerned about how glass ended up in a forest, but..."

"Well don' ask me, 'cuz I dunno how it 'appened. It just came out of nowheah. It musta been Macavity."

"But there'll be time to worry about that later, for now we need this examined!"

Eventually, they concluded that they needed to operate, as the antibiotic medication was not quite doing it's job. Quaxo noted that during his sedation, Mungojerrie was quieter than he'd ever seen him before, and asked Jenny if he could anesthetise him more often. She said no. Eventually, though, he recovered, and went back to his daily routine of...not doin' anythin' suspicious. Roight?

A/N:

Jem: Hey, that wasn't very funny at all!

JJ: Yeah, sorry, there's not much funny about infected wounds.

Quaxo: And you didn't once reference that we're cats, OR that I'm magical! And you made me a total jerk!

JJ: Okay, I made you really smart at least! And you're a funny jerk!

Jenny: And why was my little Mungo acting so suspicious?

JJ: He's, uh, woozy from the medication!

Tugger: And why is Quaxo gay for ME of all people? And why wasn't I in this apart from a vague reference? I'm sure everyone's missing my beautiful face!

JJ: Get over it.

Macavity: Yeah, get over yourself, you drama queen. Besides, I'm clearly the sexy one.

Demeter: MACAVITY!

Anyways, I'm planning on doing one chapter of this for every horrible, depressing story I submit. Sorry if you like those, I'm still doing them, I just need to mix it up every once in a while. Hope you enjoyed the first chapter, R&R!

A/N 2: The Return of more information than anybody asked for

NOOO! Now my word count isn't an even 4000! :(