A/N This is a very, very silly little fic. I came up with the idea during an exam which I finished early. Dedicated to anyone who has daydreamed during an exam. I wrote it for fun and it's supposed to be a fun little read, not the most amazing fic in the universe. I hope you enjoy it anyway. Review please!
Disclaimer: I don't own the Doctor, but I do own Sasha.
Sasha had spent all day revising for her exam. It was maths. It was difficult. "Quadratic" was now her most hated word.
She was seated at a singled desk with graffiti scrawled on it "Exam suk!" "B-O-R-E-D" "AAAARGH!" The usual sort of thing. She didn't like being isolated from everyone else. The amount of nervous energy coming off her friends was immense. She was seated right next to the window but the vast curtain had been drawn across it so she couldn't see outside.
The supervisor read the rules out in a monotone voice, like a robot. Silence dominated the room, filling every corner. The exam began. The only sounds were of calculator buttons being tapped and pens scratching the paper.
Sasha was about half way through the loathsome, torturous paper when it happened. The school talked of nothing else for months. And Sasha herself became something of a celebrity from the experience.
What happened was this: a slow cracking sound echoed throughout the hall. It was coming from the window. Sasha looked up from her paper. The exam supervisors froze. The sound of glass breaking was unmistakable. Sasha watched as the shards of glass rained down onto the floor from behind the curtain.
Something whipped past her nose, a blurred shape. It zoomed across the hall and out the door on the other side. Had it been a bird? A super strength, super fast bird who had flown straight through the glass?
Her wondering stopped as a figure stepped out from behind the curtains. Right in front of her. She could only stare. He was tall. He was skinny. He was wearing a brown suit. He was waving a blue torch.
The curtain rail promptly fell down, bringing the curtain with it. The man lightly bounced out of the way so he was even closer to her desk. Sasha could now see that what had been the music block was now a crumbled mess of a building. A billion questions raced through her head. And then he spoke.
"Hello," he announced loudly. "Exams is it? Oh good, I love exams! Well, most of them. And when I say most, I mean some. Oh, alright a few. Still, takes some exam to baffle me. The only one I truly failed was the TARDIS driving test, but that was just ridiculous and hardly anyone passed it! What is it young humans say now? "Epic fail"? Don't you just love the word "epic"? Of course the whole expression is ruined by the word "fail" and..."
"Who are you?" Sasha cut in. No-one else was going to, and it was her he appeared to be talking to.
"Right. Yes. Good question. I was just coming to that. I'm the Doctor."
He said it with a proud smile, as if he'd just found a cure for cancer.
"Doctor? Doctor who?" she pressed, not satisfied. She glanced at the supervisor for help, but she appeared to be stunned into silence.
"I knew you were going to say that," the Doctor stated factually. "It's either "Doctor who?" or "Doctor what?" or "What's your real name?" or "You can't just be 'The Doctor'" But here I am, just the Doctor!"
"Er...O.K..." Sasha mumbled.
"What's your name?" he asked.
"Sasha Wright..."
"Excuse me," the supervisor finally chipped in "If you're a Doctor, then why aren't you at your practice?"
The Doctor rolled his eyes.
"Just a minute, I'm talking to my new friend Sasha. What are you doing there then, Sasha? Ooh, algebra! I love a good bit of algebra! Exercises the brain!"
It was at this point that Sasha decided that yes, he was definitely mad. Or an alien.
"Let's see, the answer to that one is x squared plus three y minus x. Go on, write it down! X squared plus three y minus x. Here's how you do it..."
"Excuse me!" the supervisor strode over to where the Doctor stood. "I'm going to have to ask you to leave at once!"
"Who, me?" the Doctor appeared shocked that he was being asked to leave. After all, he'd only interrupted an important exam and smashed some windows.
"Yes! With me, now! And you're going to have to pay for that glass!"
The Doctor's expression changed from shock to outrage.
"I didn't break it! It was the Cheleekashov! You could try getting it to pay, but it would probably eat you. You didn't happen to see it, did you?"
The supervisor was now purple with anger and frustration. Sasha pointed the direction the speeding maybe bird had taken.
"Thank you!" he beamed. "Nice to meet you, Sasha!"
"I think it was nice to meet you too," she replied shakily. "And thanks!"
"No problem!" he grinned.
He began to sashay round the desks towards the door. But he was blocked by the supervisor. She had her hands on her hips and a "threatening" glare. The Doctor looked at her with an unconcerned expression.
"Excuse me," he said politely.
"You're not going anywhere! Annie's called the police!" the supervisor hissed.
"The police? Can't be more scary than the Judoon or, I don't know, Gene Hunt. If you got Gene Hunt in, well then I'd be worried. The Judoon are a bit too funny looking to be scary."
"Gene Hunt is a fictional character in BBC crime dramas Life on Mars and Ashes to Ashes," the supervisor explained slowly.
"I wouldn't tell him that," the Doctor said cheerily. "I love those T.V shows, though. Shame the lead in Life on Mars looks a bit like a psychotic man who tried to destroy the world though..."
Screaming echoed from somewhere on site. The Doctor smacked his hand to his forehead.
"Oh! The Cheleekashov! I've been so busy chatting you about telly I forgot there was an alien trying to blow a hole in the universe! Bye! Oh, and Sasha? The next one is z to the power of three!"
He dashed off, waving at Sasha. She blinked, stunned.
Then, the school exploded.
A year later, Sasha sat at the very spot she had sat during her maths exam. The school had been fully repaired since. The charred remains of that day were soon replaced with brand new buildings. Luckily, there were only minor injuries and no deaths.
Sasha had a feeling the Doctor had had something to do with that.