While I was watching the episode, it reminded me of a Ten/Rose moment that would have fit in a way. I guess they didn't do that because Bellarke would be too canon then. I mean 4x13 basically put us in the 'canon' category right?

By the way, I recommend listening to "Bellarke's Theme" by Tree Adams while reading this. I wrote this with that playing on the background. You can find it on Spotify and Youtube. (Yep, it's from season 3)

The warm feeling still sat inside her chest even as they walked side by side down the hallways.

I had you for that.

His words rang in her ears as tears stung her eyes. The look he had on his face was too much it seemed like her heart was about to burst. God, she didn't want to lose him, she thought as she stole a glance at him. Her heart churned at the mere thought of him dying, of leaving in a world without him.

"Let me get the stuff you need. You go on ahead." Raven said as she stopped by one of the doors.

They both nodded and walked down towards the lobby with only the sound of their heavy boots filling the space around them.

Her stomach dipped once more as shivers ran down her spine. She hoped he hadn't noticed. She hoped he wouldn't notice that her hands were slightly trembling and that she was drenched in sweat underneath her suit.

A dark cloud passed over her as her body grew numb. Every step brought her closer to the end. She could feel it. Somehow something within her told her that she wasn't ever going to come back. She couldn't explain it but she knew. And she hoped and prayed to whatever entity that he wouldn't be there. That he'd be safe. That he'd survive.

He passed her the helmet of her suit with that small smile that softened his face. With a nod, she accepted the helmet. Her chest tightened as blood gushed to her ears. Her thoughts floated as she worked mechanically. She barely even heard Raven enter the room and told them to wait for her while she put on her suit. They were silently making final checks for any tears on their suits when he suddenly spoke.

"Hey, you alright?" he asked, his hands lifting his helmet onto his head.

She watched as his head poked out of the glass of his helmet before she replied. "Yeah..."

Bellamy frowned and tilted his head to look at her worriedly like he always does.

"You sure?"

Ever the worry freak, she thought as a small sad chuckle left her lips. Their eyes met and she found herself lost in his warm brown eyes that always seemed to see right through her. How does he do that?

Then she realized that if she was his brain, then he was her heart. He was the small voice inside her head that always tells her to be strong, that always tells her that she wasn't alone. The thought brings tears to her eyes as her legs bring her closer to him until she stood right in front of him.

"Clarke?" His voice broke just as her heart broke to pieces at the fear in his voice and the fear within her.

God, he was so strong. So selfless. So much of what she wasn't. And she was grateful, so grateful that she had met man like him. If it wasn't for him, she wouldn't be here, she wouldn't be the woman that she is today.

His voice wavered as his eyes glistened with unshed tears. "Why do you always look like you're saying goodbye?"

Her heart shattered there and it was so hard not to cry. She simply closed her eyes. Reaching for both sides of his helmet, she pulled him down and placed a small kiss on the glass.

"I'm not."

And when she opened her eyes, a tear escaped down her cheek.

Damn it.

At the same time, Raven had arrived with her suit and launched into the instructions of what they should do.

It was true though. She wasn't saying goodbye. She was saying...

Live on, Bellamy Blake.

Gah! I love them so much and I hate that we have to wait for a year to see them again after that episode that pretty much kept my hopes up every single minute.

I would have chosen a season 4 track "Bellamy and Clarke" but it sounded too hopeful to me? "Bellarke's Theme" just felt sadder. Or it may just be me. Anyway, I hoped you enjoyed it!