((Author's Notes - You want to know what 'Anata saseru kanjiru' means? -Evil smirk- Aha. That would give it all away. It's only a rough translation, but go find some Gaijin who knows enough Japanese to translate it for you, if you're that desperate. Random introspection fic... don't even ask where. I pulled this out of my ass at about midnight...))

Disclaimer - I don't own Seishirou or Subaru. Subaru is owned by Seishirou, Seishirou is owned by the tree, and they are all owned by CLAMP. But one day.... one day they will all be mine...

Only You.

"...A...Anata..."

"...Hmm?"

"...A-... anata saseru... kanjiru..."

The dark-haired man raised his head, to where his lover was curled up in his arms. The Sumeragi could be, he decided, quite cute when he wanted to be. Of course, the Sumeragi was always cute.

But then, Seishirou could be cute if he really wanted to. Like now, for instance. The Sakurazukamori trailed his fingertips down the other man's back, very lightly, making the Sumeragi shiver pleasantly in his arms.

"...Shouin. Ai shiteru, Subaru-kun."

Subaru froze, pressing into Seishirou's grip, making the Sakurazukamori shake in anticipation. It was this sensation; the feel of lavender-scented hair, and the feel of light fingertips around his shoulders. This was why Seishirou played such a heartbreaking game. It was all for these moments. But now, he would have to leave. After all, if he stayed any longer, the Sumeragi would know it was not a dream. He was already taking it too far, as it was.

Subaru and Seishirou were curled up, in Subaru's bed, in the Sumeragi's house. Seishirou had taken great pains to keep the Sumeragi in a dreamlike state. Not too sleepy to feel, and to hear, and to talk, but dreamy enough to assure him that it was all a dream.

Now, time to leave. Drawing away from the warmth of the Sumeragi's body, he felt his heart give a slight tug as he heard the slight whimper of regret from Subaru.

"...D-don't... please don't leave me..."

Seishirou turned, planting a soft kiss on the Sumeragi's forehead and smoothing his head. Already, the spell was wearing off slightly, and he didn't have much time.

"...I have to, Subaru-kun. I'm sorry. I'll see you again. I'll visit you, in your dreams. So, don't be sad, Subaru-kun."

He leant closer again, pressing his lips onto him, onto Subaru's cheek this time, kissing him softly. Love you, and leave you. Wasn't that how the saying went? Well, something like that.

Subaru whimpered. He didn't want him to go. Never... He never wanted these dreams to end. For, that was what he knew them as: dreams. Nothing more.

"...If this is a dream, I don't want to wake up. Please... Seishirou-san...."

Seishirou laughed softly, "...You must stop using the honorific, Subaru-kun. We're past that now, ne?"

Subaru felt himself sob, choked, "...Old habits... die hard."

Raising a hand, Seishirou pushed the boy's hair back very gently, running a thumb over his forehead. The Sakurazukamori had to be going now, he had to. The spell he cast over the Sumeragi was already fading, and if he wasn't careful, Subaru would 'wake up'.

Pulling away, he relinquished a final kiss, onto the Sumeragi's cheek. He hadn't ever kissed his lips. Not ever. In the small midnight trysts that had been happening dangerously often, now. A kiss on the lips would leave a mark. Not on him, physically, but things like would leave an impression. And he didn't want to let the Sumeragi know that his little visitations were more than a dream. Why? Why indeed. Seishirou didn't want to think about it.

Pulling away from the Sumeragi, he was surprised to find slim fingers entwined with his shirt, holding him still. Frowning, he turned to face Subaru, who had a look of pure, frantic pain on his face.

"...Subaru-kun... let go...." Seishirou's voice was patient, and he took Subaru's fingers, attempting to prise them off. It didn't work. Subaru only held tighter.

"...If you're my dream, I want you to stay! Please, Seishirou-san....!" Subaru's voice was pleading, and he pulled the man closer, right onto his chest, holding him there with strength Seishirou hadn't imagined the willowy Sumeragi to possess.

"...Subaru-kun! Let go, I mean it!"

"No!" Subaru was pleading. yet angry. As Seishirou turned a practised eye on him, he saw, to his dismay, that the spell was almost completely finished. And, what with Subaru holding his shirt so tightly, he couldn't replace it. If Subaru got hurt, he might doubt that it was a dream, but Seishirou had no other options. If the Sumeragi found out it was real... well... it was unacceptable.

"...Subaru-kun! I said LET GO!" Grabbing at the Sumeragi's wrists, he pushed him away roughly, ignoring the small cry Subaru gave. Getting up, he swept away in a flurry of sakura petals. Too late, he realised that his harsh handling had cut the Sumeragi's arm. Seishirou cursed under his breath. The events of the night might have been explainable as a dream, but a cut... it would still be there when Subaru 'woke up'.

Damn. The one thing he hadn't wanted to happen. Or had he?

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.:Lani:. ...Okay. I understand. Seishirou is majorly OOC in this fic... But it'll change! I swear! This is just a small insight! He'll become the emotionless bastard we all know and love by the first 'real' chapter!

.:Tree:. I don't know... this new Sakurazukamori is rather odd...

.:Lani:. I guess so... Hey! Wait! Sakura-san?? The hell are you doing in my fic????

.:Tree:. Complimenting you. Unlike them...

.:CLAMP:. ...Damn right. You mess up the characters with every fic you write...

.:Lani:. Oh... shut up. You don't know where I live!!! -Cackle-

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