I should be cold, sitting up all I can see is curtains upon curtains of lashing rain, I look down at my clothes, they are drenched, my once pale blue shirt, now a dark navy and clinging to my skin as the water drips out of it. I know I should be cold, I just can't feel it. I can hear the sound of the rain hitting leaves and the wind whistling through the trees, I can even hear the traffic on the road, the road at least twenty miles away from where I currently sit in the clearing. The clearing, I blink, letting it all come into focus, the bright green leaves on the trees, the droplets of water dripping from them. I look around me, Edward, I need Edward, where is he? He said he would be here when I woke up, he promised.
Standing up I look around, my muscles tense. I survey my body, I look thinner, yet my once barely there curves are now prominent, a tiny waist, with boobs at least two cup sizes bigger. My hands run over my body, feeling its solid smoothness, the marble texture I always felt with Edward, I now felt with myself. A burning sensation begins to rise in the back of my throat, like bad acid reflux, it is searing me. I smell something, it smells delicious. Suddenly I hear a deer near by, I run at full speed towards it, tackling it to the ground. My feeding is in no way delicate, I walk away leaving the deer's mutilated carcass to be devoured by birds.
Gathering rain water in my hands, I use it to wash my mouth, I was as the pure clean water becomes a rusty red colour as it cleanses me, a little water clears me of this deed. The burning sensation has subsided, I feel grounded, stable. Taking a few slow paces, slow for a newborn vampire that is I begin to find my way out of the clearing. Edward, his name echoes in my mind, my body is crying for him, crying for his presence, his touch, the soothing coolness of his body next to mine. I reach the edge of the forest. The sky is dark, I know the chances of being discovered like this are slim, yet I am still hesitant as step out of the protection of the trees and onto the foot path that runs alongside the main road into, and out of Forks.
Walking towards the Cullen's house on the outskirts of town gives me plenty of time to think, to wonder were Edward was, to ponder why he had gone against his word and left me to lay in the cold rain, to face my transformation alone. Approaching the driveway I was hit with a wave of uncertainty, should I really confront him? I willed myself to walk on, to keep my head held high and reach the front door my hand reaches out to knock it. I forget my own strength, knocking a lot harder than I had intended to, the door shakes beneath my fist.
It is Carlisle's friendly face that answers the door to me, a smile that quickly turns to shock and disbelief as he takes me in. "Bella?" his voice comes out uncertain and shaky. "Carlisle what's wrong? You're scaring me!" I plead as he shakes his head. "Bella, you should come in, quickly" he ushers me inside the house, my clothes dripping a puddle on Esme's beautiful hardwood floors. "Alice!" his voice booms upstairs "I need you to bring down some dry clothes please, now!". I am guided into the living room, made to stand in the centre, I hear Alice come downstairs and listen carefully as Carlisle thanks her, taking the clothes and sending her away. Alice seems, sad, unlike her usual perky self.
Carlisle brings me the clothes, leaving the room as he allows me to change, the clothes are simple, plain black sweats and a white wide necked off the shoulder t shirt. I sit down on the brown leather sofa and wait for Carlisle to come back into the room, my hands folded neatly in my lap. He enters, closing the door behind him, it is clear that this is simply between him and I, he doesn't want the rest of the family to know just yet that I am here, I need to know why he is keeping me a secret.
"Bella, you shouldn't have survived the change," he breaks to me softly, his hands reaching out for mine "we checked on you, every few hours, no heart beat, no pain, you were dead," his eyes meet mine sincerely. "Carlisle, I can't be dead, I'm sitting here aren't I? You can see me! You can touch me!" I get frantic pulling at his hand, pulling on my clothing, trying to prove somehow that I am alive. "Yes Bella, you are here, but how is the question I would like answered," Carlisle mumbles.
I stand up, pacing the room at vampire speed. "You all thought I was dead, you thought I was dead and you just left me to rot in that clearing?" I hiss, anger rising inside of me. I hear footsteps rush downstairs and the living room door swings open, it's Jasper. "Carlisle I felt..." before he can finish his sentence he notices me, his eyes bulging wide "but she was..". I interrupt him, "you better not say the word dead Jasper or so help me God I will kill someone!". His eyes widen more in fear as his gift allows him to feel the sincerity on every word I speak.
"Bella, you made it, you're a vampire!" his voice comes out in a shocked gasp and I roll my eyes. "Yes clearly I made it, people in this house need to stop pointing out the God dam obvious, I survived the change, I am now a vampire, I accomplished my first feeding, on my own." Both Jasper and Carlisle look at me in utter shock "feeding?" Carlisle whispers "Bella I mean you really shouldn't have fed without one of us there to supervise! What if you had drained that human? What if they had become one of us?" I look at him puzzled "Human? Carlisle I fed from a dear."
Jasper looks astounded, taking a seat on the sofa facing me. "Carlisle, she fed on an animal, her VERY FIRST feed was on an animal, surely that is not normal?" his voice whispers, the shock evident. Suddenly a wave of guilt overwhelms me, my first feed was from an animal yet Jasper is trying so hard to make sure he only feeds from animals. My accomplishment must seem like a kick in the teeth to him. "Jasper I am so sorry, I shouldn't have mentioned it."
"Bella, it's okay, we can't tip toe around my feeding issue for everyone, it's great that you fed from an animal right away." Jasper runs his fingers through his hair as his breath comes out in a deep sigh. I sit down on the couch, elbows resting on my knees as my head rests in my hands, I shake my head slowly, processing everything, my mind is racing a million miles a minutes, I can barely keep up with my own thoughts. "Carlisle what is wrong with me? Why did I survive?" I look at him, eyes wide and pleading. "Bella, I really don't know" Carlisle whispers his hand reaching out to rest on my arm, a soft and soothing trust. "We can figure it out right Carlisle? You can figure it out?" Jasper pleaded almost desperately. "I can try Jasper, I haven't heard of a case like this, we all thought she was dead" Carlisle answers calmly.