Written for the:
Create-A-Potion Challenge by APhoenixRising
So glad that I finally got this done, this has been sitting in my oneshots folder for so long. I'm glad that I'll finally be able to submit my second piece in. I have only done Wolfstar once before, and I hope that this one turns out a little better. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I don't own HP.
Howl To The Moon
Remus Lupin started smoking when he was fifteen years old. Sirius Black introduced him to cigarettes, and he began because it was the only thing that calmed him. In the week before the full moon, he was jittery and fidgeted a lot in class, often doodling on pieces of work or practicing wand manoeuvres (without the wand, of course). His professors, the ones that knew about his condition, that is, excused his behaviour, giving him those sympathetic looks that he was all too used to.
Smoking calmed his nerves. He bought (read: stole) his cigarettes off the Black Market of Hogwarts (otherwise known as the underneath of Sirius Black's bed- though that was only this week), and went up to the Astronomy Tower to smoke them. He didn't want to stink up the dorm room, because all prefects in Hogwarts had been instructed by the two Heads to do surprise inspections of the dorms, so they could catch any troublemakers. The only reason that Sirius' stash of outlawed objects hadn't been confiscated already was because he hid them so well. It was amazing that Sirius always seemed to know when the inspections would be. And no, Remus, being a prefect himself, wasn't telling him a thing. Most believed that it was one of those mysteries better left unsolved, but Remus suspected that Lily Evans was telling him. After all, she bought her own (not too secret) stash of sugar quills from Sirius, and she wouldn't want those running out too quickly, what, with N.E.W.T's just around the corner.
The Astronomy Tower was a remarkably nice place to relax. On their nightly rounds, the prefects never checked there because it was late, they were tired and they honestly couldn't be bothered. So Remus was free to smoke, uninterrupted, while his friends did… whatever they did in the evenings. Alright, so there were the occasional owl droppings, and the stone did tend to get very cold during the night, but it was nice. He would dangle his legs out of the window, and watch the smoke twirl around into different shapes before disappearing with the wind, and it was all good.
But then Sirius showed up, disturbing his carefully built space.
Monday
Sirius Black was huge. Everything he did was big, and bright, and loud. The Astronomy Tower was quiet, and calm, and perfect for Remus to sit in. Sirius did nothing to add to that atmosphere, and Remus couldn't help but be a bit disappointed that his special place had been disrupted.
"You're not going to jump, are you?" asked Sirius, curious, but not concerned, when he walked in the first time, voice echoing around in the nearly empty tower. Remus, startled by his presence, had almost fallen backward off of the window ledge.
"You – you bloody – don't bloody –" he sputtered, grip on the ledge very tight as he considered that he could have fallen to his death if he'd fallen a different way.
Sirius had the grace to look at least a little bit apologetic. "Shit, sorry, mate. Didn't mean to scare you."
Remus waved off his apology. "What're you doing here?" he asked, a tiny bit of grumpiness leaking into his tone of voice.
Sirius shrugged. "I was curious as to what you got up to when you came here, Mister Antisocial. James said, 'leave him alone, he needs his space', but I thought, 'stuff that', and decided to visit."
"Gee, thanks, Padfoot."
Sirius gave him a look. "I'm sensing some light sarcasm coming from a north-westerly direction," he said. "Pack up your lawn furniture, folks."
"And I still wonder why you aren't a comedian yet."
The dark haired boy rolled his eyes, and gestured for Remus to move. "Shove, you git. I'm joining you tonight."
Remus, though a little confused, dutifully made room for the demanding Black. It was a bit of a tight squeeze on the window sill, but neither of them minded. At least it gave them some extra warmth, Remus thought, as he noticed how firmly pressed together their arms were. His fingers played an imaginary piano on his own thigh, nerves making him a bit more jittery than usual.
Sirius only lasted a couple of minutes before saying, "Remus, I believe that it is so cold that my testicles are about to drop off. How do you do this?"
Remus snorted. "Transfigure yourself a blanket, you weakling. It's barely seventeen degrees."
He ignored Sirius' grumbling. He felt that he deserved to light the lone cigarette occupying his right pocket, for being able to put up with his mate for so long. He fumbled around in his cloak for it, and finally shoved it between his lips, murmuring a quick spell to light it. A long inhale had his fingers calming.
"Hold the goddamn phone," Sirius said loudly, making Remus pause with his cigarette halfway to his mouth, mouth wide open as he stared at his friend. "You don't smoke. Remus Moony Lupin does not smoke. You're a bloody prefect! Oh my Merlin. I need to get photographic evidence of this."
"You do realise that 'Moony' isn't my middle name, right?"
"Prongs is never going to believe this."
"It's not that exciting…"
"Gimme that," Sirius said, eyes bright with this new revelation. Remus reluctantly handed over his fag, and watched resignedly as Sirius took his own drag, before blowing out the smoke, making a neat circle with it.
"Alright, give it back."
"I can't believe that you smoke."
"Get over it."
Tuesday
Sirius sat down earlier on in the evening, ready to start chattering away about trivial things that had happened during the day, or even the dream that he'd had the night before. The circles underneath Remus' eyes were darkening, and the crease in his forehead was deepening, and Sirius knew exactly how to cheer him up. Inane conversation always managed to amuse Remus, for whatever reason, and Sirius could supply those very easily.
"…and so I said, 'Fuck, McGoogles, you can't expect me to just shag you, you're meant to get all seductive, not bloody jump me during detention', and she said-"
"What in the hell are you on about?" Remus mumbled around the cigarette lying between his chapped lips, looking vaguely entertained.
"Just making sure you were listening," Sirius said, a smirk twisting his mouth, eyes glittering with his own amusement. "Sometimes I feel as if I'm completely ignored when I sit with you." He let out a dramatic sigh, holding his hand against his forehead as he leant into Remus. "You probably only keep me here for my good looks."
"That would be true, if you actually had good looks."
"Green isn't a good colour on you, love."
Wednesday
Remus was pleasantly surprised when he Sirius once again sat down on the window ledge, legs dangling over the edge. Remus honestly didn't mind now, either, because it was nice having a companion, somebody to distract him from what was quickly approaching. The full moon was never a pleasant experience, so the closer it got, the more shaken that Remus would get.
Sirius brought a game for entertainment that night, but he was generally a bad loser, and tended to get very pissed off when Remus continued to win their games of Exploding Snap.
"I can't believe you just threw our only pack of cards out the window," Remus said, slightly dumbfounded, as they watched the cards float through the air, slowly gliding to the ground.
"Your fault for winning," Sirius grumbled. Remus' mouth dropped open, causing the cigarette to drop from its place in his mouth.
"Ah, fuck," he yelped when it landed on his trousers, frantically brushing it off before his trousers could get ruined.
"Watch it, Lupin, you could get seriously hurt," Sirius said with a grin, nimbly picking up the cigarette from where it had fallen on the stone to take a drag. He had never been bothered about germs and since this was only Remus, he couldn't care less. What was a little spit between best mates?
"You're such a prick," Remus said with a shake of his head, a little bit amused (not that he was going to show it).
Sirius scowled at him. "You're only saying that because you won. You're such a bad winner, Remus. If I had won –"
" – you would be lording it over me like it was going out of style. You'd probably use your blanket as a cape and then stride around the tower, boasting about your legendary 'Exploding Snap' skills."
Sirius paused, unwilling to admit that that was probably true. "…well nobody likes you."
Remus laughed. "That's nice, Pads."
With nothing else to do, Sirius ended up resting his head on the werewolf's shoulder, eyes closing so that he could try to get some sleep. They tended to stay up very late in the tower, even though Remus repeatedly told Sirius that he could leave at any time ("Ah, stuff it, Moons. You know I'm staying, whether you like it or not."), so Sirius took any opportunity to catch up on his sleep.
"Your shoulder's bony," the animagus mumbled with vague displeasure. Remus rolled his eyes, and adjusted himself so that Sirius' head lay in the crook of his neck.
"That better?"
Sirius murmured something happily.
Remus never liked it when Sirius napped on the window sill. He always worried that there would somehow be an accident, and they'd both go tumbling off. While Remus hated being a werewolf, he wasn't suicidal, so he cast a light sticking charm on his friend's trousers, so that he wouldn't fall.
"…protective git," came from Sirius' mouth when he heard the enchantment. His hair tickled Remus' neck.
"Just go to sleep, Sirius."
And when Remus began to tap out a beat on Sirius' shoulder with the tips of his fingers, as he started to get restless, neither of them said anything.
Thursday
Sirius had figured out early on that studying harder before the full moon made Remus feel less guilty for missing class while he recovered. That was why he came prepared to test Remus on various subjects. He figured that it would make Remus happy, and it always made him feel good inside when he saw Remus smile.
"Ingredients of a love potion, go!" Sirius exclaimed, Remus' flash cards held tightly in his palm.
Remus looked up from a book that he'd brought along, confused. "What? What're you doing?"
"Merlin, Moons, if this was a test you would've failed already. You're wasting time! What're the ingredients of a love potion?!"
Eyes wide, fingers drumming on his knee, Remus quickly replied with, "Ashwinder eggs, rose thorns, peppermint, powdered moonstone –"
"Wrong!" Sirius looked gleeful.
"No I'm not!" Remus' fingers shook as they stilled their knee tapping.
"Nah, you're right, I just wanted to say that. Who invented Amortentia?!"
"Lavender de something or other?" Remus said, unsure. He remembered that it started with an 'L', but the details escaped him.
Sirius shrugged, "Okay. Who cares, anyway, he's just some pompous old bloke. Why do we even need to know who invented Amortentia?"
Remus gave a wry smile. "Dunno, 'pparently it'll be on some exam, or something."
"Whoever invented exams needs a good kick up the backside."
Remus only realised later on in the night, when the stars glimmered up in the sky and the moon lit up the grounds, that he had been too distracted by Sirius to even focus on his yearning for a cigarette.
Friday
The constant stream of conversation coming from beside him (as well as the feel of Sirius' skin on his) relaxed Remus better than any cigarette could. And he didn't know why. Though, he did know that he was beginning to find Sirius' jokes endearing instead of annoying, his drama amusing instead of far too melodramatic. Did that mean something? He knew that he didn't particularly mind the animagus' presence, but he wasn't sure if that was because he was he was getting used to it, or because he had become immune to the irritation that Sirius often prompted in others.
"Remus," Sirius groaned, leaning back so far off the sill that Remus thought that he might fall. "Why does Slughorn hate me? Did I do something to him?"
Remus snorted. "Yeah, you did, actually." In sixth year, Sirius had swapped out Slughorn's crystallised pineapple for rock salt. Slughorn didn't notice because of the heavy charms that had been put on the salt to make it seem like the candies hadn't been tampered with. Sirius had never been forgiven, and since Slughorn tended to operate on favouritism, his marks had been suffering. But only a little bit.
"I got a fucking Acceptable! A fucking Acceptable, while Snape got an Outstanding! How is that fucking fair? It's Snivellus, for Merlin's sake!"
Remus looked up at the sky, wondering how fast his death would be if he fell then and there. It would, at least, prevent him from hearing any more of Sirius' complaints. Remus gave a murmur of agreement to whatever Sirius just said, and fished about in his pocket for his one cigarette. He never allowed himself more than one per night in the week before the full moon, and it appeared that his one cigarette was still in the pack, hidden in his bedside table drawer. Damn. It was at times like this that he cursed his determination to fight an addiction. He began to fidget with his shirt, undoing the bottom few buttons and fastening them again, fingers nimble.
"…I'm better looking than Snape anyway, you'd think that Slughorn would bloody appreciate that…" Sirius' eyes wandered down to the thin sliver of stomach being shown by Remus' efforts with the buttons, enthralled by the fair strip of hair leading down from his bellybutton.
Meanwhile, Remus was pondering the question, could he survive Sirius' complaining without a cigarette? The answer was immediate: doubtful. Forget what he said before, Sirius was about to die. Remus had no idea how he did it during school hours. He was surprised that he hadn't been sainted yet, with his patience.
"…And as if Slughorn doesn't take marks off for the grease that would've dripped down onto the essay for Snivellus' hair!"
"Sirius," Remus ground out, eyes closed as he tried to control his temper. "Shut. Up."
Sirius paused, eyebrows raised as he slowly turned to look at his mate. "Getting a bit tetchy, Loopy. Something bothering you?" Of course, Sirius knew that Remus always got moodier the day before, but he just couldn't resist teasing the werewolf.
Remus resisted the urge to snarl. "The full moon is tomorrow, Sirius, and I am not in the mood to listen to your bloody whinging about your Potions mark," he said, voice low and heated.
Sirius looked wounded. "Is this what I get for sitting with you, through the cold winter nights? Is this what I get for trying to cheer you up? Is this what I get for giving you the pleasure of seeing my face every night and day?"
"Careful, I hear that melodrama's a serious illness."
"I won't put up with this abuse any longer. Remus, I demand that you leave."
"Piss off, you git. I was here first. You just… invaded."
Sirius rolled his eyes. "You make me sound like a… what's it called? A tank? Yeah, a tank. You make me sound like a tank!"
"Not sure that you're built well enough to be a tank," Remus said, scowl slowly sliding off of his face.
"Oi! I have muscles! You would know, you get jealous of them often enough. Don't think I haven't noticed you noticing my toned figure. Not that I blame you, I do work out often."
Remus snorted a laugh, a light blush spreading over his cheeks, with ears to match. "Of course."
"It's just so difficult to maintain this level of handsomeness."
Something like 'vain prat' came from Remus.
Something like 'obnoxious twat' came from Sirius.
And if Sirius rested his hand over Remus', holding on far too tightly to be considered 'just friendly', it wasn't mentioned.
Saturday
"You ready, mate?" Sirius asked, clapping a hand down on Remus' shoulder. Fear and a weary determination radiated from the werewolf as he nodded, but that simple gesture made him feel a bit better about it all.
"As I'll ever be."
Sirius gave a grim nod, and squeezed his friend's shoulder. "Pass the fag, would you?"
Sunday
Sirius allowed himself a smirk as he realised that his hunch was right. Remus was right where he was expected to be.
"So, I heard that you escaped from the Hospital Wing," Sirius said casually, sitting down next to the bandaged boy.
"Madam Pomfrey is absolutely lovely, but she is also ridiculously overbearing." Sirius decided that Remus' scowl was adorable.
"Aww, give Poppy a break, love, she cares about you. I bet she gets that motherly instinct towards you. She's also told me to tell you that painkillers would be a thing of the past if you keep on running away from the Hospital Wing."
Remus rolled his eyes at that. "I'm surrounded by drama, it appears. First you, now Madam Pomfrey. I just needed to get out. There's a reason I like the Astronomy Tower, after all."
"Mmm? And what's that?"
"Open. And free." Remus' head was tilted up towards the sky, Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed, a tiny bit of dark blond stubble glinting in the moonlight.
"The reason I like the Astronomy Tower is because you're always here. And I really like you."
Remus kept on looking out. "How many shots did you take to get up the courage to say that?" he asked, the only reaction being the slight lift of the corner of his mouth.
Sirius barked out a laugh. "'bout three."
"Well, if it makes you feel any better, you're alright company to have on these nights."
"Gee, thanks, Moony."
"I s'pose you want us to kiss, now," Remus said with a sigh, one eye on Sirius to see his response.
Sirius was torn between a frown and a laugh. He settled for an incredulous glance. "I didn't realise that it was such a chore for you."
It was only then that he saw the amusement gleaming in Remus' amber eyes.
"Just come here, you absolute pillock," Remus said, leaning in slowly until noses smushed into cheeks and mouths meshed together and tongues ran across lips. Remus' lip was bleeding from a cut that had been reopened when Sirius began to suck on it, and all Sirius could taste was the metallic tang of fresh blood, chocolate, and pure Remus Lupin. Remus was heady from the scent of Sirius' cologne, the smell of firewhiskey, and that suspicious perfume eux de wet dog. Breathing was heavy as their hands ran everywhere, up shirts and into hair, brushing past rough bandages and smooth skin, with mouths beginning to bite and suck in other places, until Remus was sure that quite a few love bites would be cropping up the next day. They only stopped when Remus flinched away from a hand that accidentally got too close to a particularly painful injury.
Remus figured that he had found a suitable replacement for his cigarettes, one that was a bit healthier, too.
