Collab between Scullywolf and crazygirlne. Beta'd by Resile, who was also prompted into prompting, "What if Jackie isn't there?"
Rose clung to the console, unsure whether the spinning she felt was from the TARDIS's flight or from leaving behind Mickey and versions of her parents on an alternate Earth.
Well, leaving behind a version of one parent, at any rate.
It felt rather like she'd lost everyone, though, and Rose felt unsteady, unsure in a way she wasn't used to. Traveling with the Doctor, it was exciting, emotional, challenging, but she rarely felt as if she were having trouble recovering from their trip.
"Can we stay at Mum's for a bit longer than usual this time? I think I need more than just a few hours," asked Rose, grateful that the spinning seemed to be slowing down. The Doctor leapt to another control, rotating it slightly, tongue to his top teeth.
"Sure," he said with a nod, keeping his focus on the controls. "'Course we can."
Rose stood still as the Doctor moved around her, pressing keys and flipping levers. She stared at a flashing light that the Doctor had once told her came standard on all spaceships and didn't do anything worth noting. Her mum… that Jackie, the other world's Jackie, she had died, slaughtered with so many while still all alone. Seeing her father alive again after she and the Doctor had made sure he didn't die alone, only to have her mother suffer a worse fate, not just being mechanized, but then… Rose had been glad the Doctor had immediately suggested a trip to the Powell Estate after they'd reached the vortex of their proper universe.
The TARDIS bumped to a halt, and the Doctor placed a steadying hand on Rose's upper arm as she swayed.
"Rose," he said, his voice low and calm. She tore her eyes away from the blinking light and turned to look at him, making an effort to keep still. "She wasn't your Jackie."
"I know," she responded, taking a deep breath, "but I need to see her. I need… I need to spend some time reminding myself she's okay, really okay. Need to see her alive, right?"
The flash of emotion in his eyes-pain, understanding, something akin to affection-stopped her from immediately running to the doors. His hand slid down to just above her elbow, and she leaned into his touch, closing her eyes for a moment before looking back at him.
"Do you want me to drop you off?" he asked, watching her. "Girls' weekend, you and Jackie can catch up." He raised his hand to rub the back of his neck, his gaze moving to somewhere over her head. "Or I could… well, the TARDIS could certainly use a break after what we just… with the parallel world and the crashing and the almost dying completely. Might do some good if I stayed for a bit, did some repairs."
Rose felt a small smile start to form, and she nodded, some of the muscles in her back relaxing. "Feels sort of like I just left everyone behind, yeah? I'd love you to stay here with me."
He grinned, and she turned toward the TARDIS's exit, moving faster as she approached, almost flinging open the doors. She looked around, orienting herself. They'd landed in the alley nearest to where her mother lived, and Rose started quickly toward the flat she'd once considered her home. Her step faltered as the Doctor caught hold of her hand before she'd realized he was so close behind her, but she regained her pace and ran an appreciative thumb across his.
They reached the flat, and Rose twisted the door knob, frowning when she found it locked. She knocked impatiently.
"Mum, it's us. Forgot my key," she called, rapping her knuckles against the door again. "Mum?" When there was no response, she turned to the Doctor.
"She should be home. It's Saturday, I can tell 'cause Mr. Peterson's door's propped open," she nodded at another flat along the way. She looked down at the locked door knob, then back to the Doctor, who had already let go of her hand to retrieve his sonic.
"Faster than going back to the TARDIS for your key," he said with a shrug, aiming the device at the handle.
After the distinctive whirring of the sonic screwdriver, the lock clicked, and Rose opened the door, rushing into the apartment.
"Mum! Mum?" she tried, glancing into the empty bedrooms and the open bathroom, the Doctor keeping a careful distance behind her, probably to avoid an accidental sighting of a naked Jackie Tyler. "She isn't here," admitted Rose after a minute of searching the small flat.
"Maybe she just popped out for the washing?" asked the Doctor, raising an eyebrow.
Rose rubbed her arm, shaking her head, not sure why she was certain something was unusual, that her mother wasn't just out on an errand.
"No. She's probably over at Jan's. She'll stay there for ages if she's there on a weekend. S'why she usually goes over during the week, 'cause Jan can talk even more than you can."
"Oi," protested the Doctor halfheartedly, any further response curbed by the fact that Rose was already making her way to the still-open door.
Rose walked briskly to the identical flat a few doors down and knocked, actively trying to curb her impatience. She took a deep breath as the Doctor joined her, trying her best to relax. She gave the Doctor a tight smile, and the door finally opened.
"Oh, it's Rose and her bloke, that doctor!" said Jan loudly, and Rose felt some of her tension drain when she heard other female voices emanating from inside the living room. The older woman smiled absently at Rose before looking the Doctor over thoroughly. He squirmed under the scrutiny from Jackie's friend, and Rose fought a smirk. "So where've you been, then, love?" Jan asked.
"Oh, you know," said Rose, "here and there." She shuffled her feet and peered through the door, trying to catch a glimpse of her mother. Why hadn't she come out yet?
"Bet your mum loved that, 'here and there.'" Jan laughed. "Always on about how she doesn't know where you got off to. It's like you don't even know where you're going!" She looked at the Doctor as Rose rubbed her own arm. "So when's you two getting married, then?"
Rose shook her head.
"We're not… Jan, is my-" she started, only to be interrupted.
"Go on, now, don't tell me you aren't together. I know Jackie don't believe it, neither, and she'd know by now, wouldn't she? Reckon I ought to ask her."
"Can I talk to her?" asked Rose when the other woman stopped talking long enough to take a breath.
"Can you talk to her? Always seemed to be able to before. I mean, dunno what you're asking me for. Had her for weeks, you have. Is she gonna be coming over to join us? Always busy on Saturdays, Jackie is. Don't understand it."
Rose stared, and she felt the Doctor's hand on her shoulder, Jan's eyes darting gleefully toward the contact.
"I told you," Jan yelled into the room behind her. "They're definitely together, don't matter what it is they say."
"You mean my mum's not in there?" asked Rose. "Do you know where she is, then?"
"What do you mean?" asked Jan, turning back toward Rose, chuckling a bit at the laughter and indistinguishable voices from inside.
"I'm looking for my mum," Rose enunciated, frustrated when Jan turned back toward her living room, ready to yell again.
"Jan," said the Doctor, his voice catching the woman's attention better than Rose's had, "we need to find Jackie. Have you seen her?"
Rose's heart sank as the woman shook her head. Maybe they should try the laundrette next, after all, or she could try calling Bev or maybe she… Jan's voice cut through her thoughts.
"Haven't seen her since she left with you lot a couple weeks ago. She hasn't even called! Expected at least a phone call, I did, but nothing, not a word. Now I know where you get it from, swanning off for a year without so much as a goodbye. Did you hear about that, Rose leaving for a year?" She looked at the Doctor. "Pretty sure he was a doctor, too, come to think of it. Got a thing for them, eh? Least I saw Jackie go, so I don't have to wonder if she got murdered or nothing. Quite the scandal, that was."
"And when was it that she left with us, exactly?" asked the Doctor, who sounded unconcerned. He squeezed Rose's shoulder reassuringly.
"I dunno, a week ago, maybe two? It's been two Saturdays, I know that much. Saw her leaving with you… Well, not you," she nodded at the Doctor, "but with Rose. They had suitcases packed, so I knew they were joining you, going traveling or whatever it is you do. Did she have a good time? I thought she might. Either that or she'd hate it, you know. Never do really know whether you'll like traveling until you do it, right? I said so to-"
"She can't have left with me," said Rose, having trouble moving past her mother not being where she needed her to be, when she needed her to be there. "I didn't go anywhere with her."
"What?" Jan sounded confused, her face contorted almost comically. "But of course you did. Saw it myself, didn't I?"
"But-"
"Rose," interrupted the Doctor, "we might've visited and forgotten."
"But how could I forget?" asked Rose, knowing she was missing something but struggling to stave off the panic. "I need to see her, Doctor, after… knowing she…"
"Rose," he said again, gentle but insistent, while Jan watched the exchange with wide eyes. "You remember how we travel?" She looked at him, trying to understand. "There might not be a memory to forget, yet."
Rose's eyes widened as she understood.
"We'll go back for her," she confirmed.
The Doctor nodded.
Jan, who Rose had forgotten was listening, chimed in, and Rose wondered whether she'd ever heard her stay quiet for so long. It must have been at least thirty seconds.
"Are you pregnant, then? I never could remember anything when I was pregnant. Forgot my own name a few times, I did. Well, surname, at any rate. Is that why you need to talk to your mum? Is it something about the baby?"
Rose shook her head again, frowning.
"No, I'm not pregnant. We're not together like that."
"Well now, I don't believe..." started Jan, but the Doctor spoke over her.
"Oh, look at the time," he said, glancing at his bare wrist. "We've got to go. It's been lovely catching up with you, must do it again soon. Bye now." He put his hand on Rose's lower back and started leading her away, moving quickly toward the TARDIS.
"Well, I never…" heard Rose from behind her as Jan's door shut. She tuned out the noise as it grew muffled and faint, turning her attention to the Doctor instead.
"Never thought I'd meet a woman who could out-Jackie Jackie," he was mumbling, more to himself than anything. "But what's she doing coming with us on the TARDIS? And with luggage! That's not just a quick trip, is it? Figures it would take an ontological paradox for me to let your mother on board."
"My mum leaving with us, that's us getting her now, today, yeah? Our now, I mean, soon as we get back to the TARDIS. You just take me and mum somewhere else since we didn't stay here," suggested Rose. "I dunno, the beach or something. Don't really care where we are, just so long as I get to see her."
"Yes, I suppose I could drop you two off somewhere for a nice holiday," he said. "Maybe we'll find the TARDIS could do with refueling after all. Right, well, let's go pick her up, and we can figure it out from there."
"But how are we gonna find out when to go get her? I need her now."
Rose heard the slight whine in her voice and knew she was repeating herself, but she couldn't bring herself to care. She was exhausted, having had no real mental or physical rest since they'd dealt with the Cybermen. She stumbled, and the Doctor's arm moved from her lower back to wrap around her waist.
"Easily sorted, Rose. Just have to do a scan for the TARDIS's energy signature, and that'll tell us when we were here."
She closed her eyes, leaning into his support and letting him get them safely to the TARDIS.