Title: Misery Loves Company
Rating: pg-13 (for now)
Summary: Buffy is not brought back from the dead. Leaving Dawn to fend for herself.
Disclaim: None of these characters are mine. Though I wish Spike and Angel were because if they were they would chained to my bed right now. *Sigh* It's always good to dream.
********************
Dawn looked out the car window. Of course she didn't see much. Everything was pretty much a blur outside the windows which were painted black. She looked over at her blonde companion. He was hunched over the seat trying to see the road, even with his vampiric eye sight. She glanced down at the journal in her lap. The road was smooth and her mind was a jumble of thoughts. The perfect conditions to write under. She had burned all her journals after it happened. Ever stupid little detail she wrote in them, the times she wrote about how cute Xander was or how annoying her sister coulg be, it all seemed pointless after. But Spike encouraged her to keep writing. He had said that anything she couldn't tell him, which was very little, she should let out on paper. She reached in her purse for a pen. Finding one she looked at the crisp, clean paper. Spike's smile at her actions did not go unnoticed by her as she began to write.
**********She had said to live, for her. She had whispered those words like that advice would save my life. I wonder if this is what she meant. I truly doubt it. I'm going 90 on a highway with a vampire who had tried to kill her more than once. I am broken beyond repair. I wonder if this is what she meant.
It didn't take long for everything to fall apart. The Scoobies had never looked at me and see Dawn. I was always 'Buffy's Bratty Little Sister.' It was only a matter of time after Buffy jumped off that tower and into that portal to save the world that I would no long be 'Buffy's Little Sister', I was now the Key. The thing that had caused all of this to happen, the thing that Buffy had killed herself for. They blame me, they tell me they don't but I see it in their eyes. But that's actually when that subject is brought up. The rest of the time they just ignore me.
Xander, dear sweet Xander, I know he blames me. He was never good at hiding his emotions. He is now tense around me. No longer joking with me. But he's still cute. See, the old Dawn still exists, she's just taking a hiatus right now. But my childhood crush on him keeps me from hating him too much. Anya looks at me like I might blow her up with my mind. Willow blames me too. But she also pities me. I'm not sure which one is worse. She's diving deeper into magic. She's pushing all of us away, even Tara.
This summer she told us she was thinking about raising Buffy from the dead. We were sitting around a table in the Magic Box. Everyone minus Spike and Giles, who was in England. I lost it. I pushed the books off of the table slamming my hands down. Everyone looked shocked. My eyes were brimmed with tears from the pure fury. I told Willow that if she did it I would kill her myself. No way would I let them rip Buffy from Heaven. They threw some bullshit in my face saying that she might be in some hell dimension. But I knew she was in Heaven with mom. Pretty slayer souls go to Heaven. I wonder destructive Keys go? I think that night they realized how jaded I really am.
After that I called Giles because I know that if they were determined my threat wouldn't mean anything. I told Giles and he said he would come back. And he did. He doesn't blame me. He just hates me because I remind him of Buffy. I had found out that he was planning to kill me if it had come down to me and the world. I also know that he had killed Ben. I confronted him on it on one of our talks. Then I hugged him and told him thank you. If it had come down to me and the world I would of killed myself if Buffy hadn't beaten me to it. His blue eyes filled with tears and then he started crying. I stayed with him and rocked him while he cried for his dead daughter.
I never cry in front of them. They don't deserve my mourning. But I cry, in front of Spike. We both cry holding each other and sobbing and screaming. But he doesn't see Dawn either. He sees his Nibblet or Lil Bit, but I am grateful because that's as close to Dawn that I'll get. Other than Spike, Tara is my only other true friend. I think she actually sees me, Dawn. I thought it was quite funny that there are only three people in the world who see me. One of them died saving the world and the others are outside of my so called family. But that's just my warped since of humor.
I'm driving to LA with Spike right now because it was all I could do to stop him from killing Willow, chip or no chip. It was two nights ago, Willow had tried once again to convince us to let her bring Buffy back. I wouldn't back down, and I had Giles, Spike, and Tara on my side. Tara had long broken up with Willow because she couldn't stand seeing Willow go down the path she was with magic. But Tara still hung around, usually for my sake. There was a huge fight. Spiteful, very spiteful things were said and I had to get away from there. I ran to Spike's crypt that night and just told him to take me away. Anywhere. He was thinking about it himself for a long time, but he had never wanted to leave me alone. But now since I was going with him he had no reason to stay. So we took off. I only said goodbye to Giles and Tara unable to face the rest of the Scooby Gang again. So here I am, listening to 80's music in Spike's black Desoto. Life can be funny like that, if you call this living.*****************
Dawn sat the pen down, seeing that Spike was looking at her curiously through the corner of his eye. She knew she had been writing for a long time and he was probably wondering what she had wrote. "Anything about me pet?" he asked grinning a bit.
"By anything do you mean my sexual fantasies about you?" Dawn asked raising an eyebrow.
"You know me all too well Nibblet." he said smirking.
Dawn rolled her eyes, these were the only times she felt like the old Dawn, when she was bickering playfully with Spike. "Dream on." she said.
"You know you can't resist my dangerous good looks and my witty charm." he said smugly leering at her. She playfully hit him on the arm. That's when she saw it, a sign indicating that they were in LA. Spike noticed her look, "Ready to start our new life or unlife in my case?" he asked.
Dawn thought for a brief moment then smiled, "More than you'll ever know."
A/N: So what did you think. Good, bad...should I even think about writing the next chapter? I'm sorry I'm a review junkie.
Rating: pg-13 (for now)
Summary: Buffy is not brought back from the dead. Leaving Dawn to fend for herself.
Disclaim: None of these characters are mine. Though I wish Spike and Angel were because if they were they would chained to my bed right now. *Sigh* It's always good to dream.
********************
Dawn looked out the car window. Of course she didn't see much. Everything was pretty much a blur outside the windows which were painted black. She looked over at her blonde companion. He was hunched over the seat trying to see the road, even with his vampiric eye sight. She glanced down at the journal in her lap. The road was smooth and her mind was a jumble of thoughts. The perfect conditions to write under. She had burned all her journals after it happened. Ever stupid little detail she wrote in them, the times she wrote about how cute Xander was or how annoying her sister coulg be, it all seemed pointless after. But Spike encouraged her to keep writing. He had said that anything she couldn't tell him, which was very little, she should let out on paper. She reached in her purse for a pen. Finding one she looked at the crisp, clean paper. Spike's smile at her actions did not go unnoticed by her as she began to write.
**********She had said to live, for her. She had whispered those words like that advice would save my life. I wonder if this is what she meant. I truly doubt it. I'm going 90 on a highway with a vampire who had tried to kill her more than once. I am broken beyond repair. I wonder if this is what she meant.
It didn't take long for everything to fall apart. The Scoobies had never looked at me and see Dawn. I was always 'Buffy's Bratty Little Sister.' It was only a matter of time after Buffy jumped off that tower and into that portal to save the world that I would no long be 'Buffy's Little Sister', I was now the Key. The thing that had caused all of this to happen, the thing that Buffy had killed herself for. They blame me, they tell me they don't but I see it in their eyes. But that's actually when that subject is brought up. The rest of the time they just ignore me.
Xander, dear sweet Xander, I know he blames me. He was never good at hiding his emotions. He is now tense around me. No longer joking with me. But he's still cute. See, the old Dawn still exists, she's just taking a hiatus right now. But my childhood crush on him keeps me from hating him too much. Anya looks at me like I might blow her up with my mind. Willow blames me too. But she also pities me. I'm not sure which one is worse. She's diving deeper into magic. She's pushing all of us away, even Tara.
This summer she told us she was thinking about raising Buffy from the dead. We were sitting around a table in the Magic Box. Everyone minus Spike and Giles, who was in England. I lost it. I pushed the books off of the table slamming my hands down. Everyone looked shocked. My eyes were brimmed with tears from the pure fury. I told Willow that if she did it I would kill her myself. No way would I let them rip Buffy from Heaven. They threw some bullshit in my face saying that she might be in some hell dimension. But I knew she was in Heaven with mom. Pretty slayer souls go to Heaven. I wonder destructive Keys go? I think that night they realized how jaded I really am.
After that I called Giles because I know that if they were determined my threat wouldn't mean anything. I told Giles and he said he would come back. And he did. He doesn't blame me. He just hates me because I remind him of Buffy. I had found out that he was planning to kill me if it had come down to me and the world. I also know that he had killed Ben. I confronted him on it on one of our talks. Then I hugged him and told him thank you. If it had come down to me and the world I would of killed myself if Buffy hadn't beaten me to it. His blue eyes filled with tears and then he started crying. I stayed with him and rocked him while he cried for his dead daughter.
I never cry in front of them. They don't deserve my mourning. But I cry, in front of Spike. We both cry holding each other and sobbing and screaming. But he doesn't see Dawn either. He sees his Nibblet or Lil Bit, but I am grateful because that's as close to Dawn that I'll get. Other than Spike, Tara is my only other true friend. I think she actually sees me, Dawn. I thought it was quite funny that there are only three people in the world who see me. One of them died saving the world and the others are outside of my so called family. But that's just my warped since of humor.
I'm driving to LA with Spike right now because it was all I could do to stop him from killing Willow, chip or no chip. It was two nights ago, Willow had tried once again to convince us to let her bring Buffy back. I wouldn't back down, and I had Giles, Spike, and Tara on my side. Tara had long broken up with Willow because she couldn't stand seeing Willow go down the path she was with magic. But Tara still hung around, usually for my sake. There was a huge fight. Spiteful, very spiteful things were said and I had to get away from there. I ran to Spike's crypt that night and just told him to take me away. Anywhere. He was thinking about it himself for a long time, but he had never wanted to leave me alone. But now since I was going with him he had no reason to stay. So we took off. I only said goodbye to Giles and Tara unable to face the rest of the Scooby Gang again. So here I am, listening to 80's music in Spike's black Desoto. Life can be funny like that, if you call this living.*****************
Dawn sat the pen down, seeing that Spike was looking at her curiously through the corner of his eye. She knew she had been writing for a long time and he was probably wondering what she had wrote. "Anything about me pet?" he asked grinning a bit.
"By anything do you mean my sexual fantasies about you?" Dawn asked raising an eyebrow.
"You know me all too well Nibblet." he said smirking.
Dawn rolled her eyes, these were the only times she felt like the old Dawn, when she was bickering playfully with Spike. "Dream on." she said.
"You know you can't resist my dangerous good looks and my witty charm." he said smugly leering at her. She playfully hit him on the arm. That's when she saw it, a sign indicating that they were in LA. Spike noticed her look, "Ready to start our new life or unlife in my case?" he asked.
Dawn thought for a brief moment then smiled, "More than you'll ever know."
A/N: So what did you think. Good, bad...should I even think about writing the next chapter? I'm sorry I'm a review junkie.