Ahahahahahah, Goth Lolita only wishes she owned these lovely characters. Then, she'd be rich and be able to move to Atlantis! Wait, what? No matter how much money I get, I can't make imaginary things exist? Well…Damn. Never mind, then.

***~~~***

Tao Jun stood on a raised platform in the center of the room. "The first official meeting of the 'I Hate My Brother' Society will now come to order."

She was largely ignored.

"I said ORDER!!!" she banged her gavel.

IGNORING!

"If you do not shut the HELL up, this instant, I will burn you all to HUNKS OF CHARCOAL!" Azula shrieked.

The ensuing silence was immediate and absolute, only broken by Hao Asakura's slow applause from somewhere in the back of the room.

"O-okay, then…" Tao Jun began again. "Since it's our first meeting, I want us all to go around and say our names, our brother's name, and why we hate them. I'll start. Hi, I'm Tao Jun,"

Polite applause.

"My brother's name is Tao Ren."

Booing.

"And I hate him because he's weak, and whiny, and angst. I could go on, but I won't."

More polite applause. Azula stood. "I am Azula. My brother's name is Zuko. I hate him because Mother loved him better AND he has…morals."

"Boooooo." Hao yelled.

"Hello, I'm Serenity. I have a brother named Joey. He's an ass, because he totally forgot about me when our parents divorced, and then, when I was having eye surgery, he. Never. Showed. Up. AND ALL HE EVER TALKS ABOUT IS TRADING CARDS!!!!"

"My name is Elyon. I'd rather not say my brother's name. But he wants to manipulate me to destroy my friends, take over my kingdom, and then he plans to kill me." Azula patted the smaller girl on the shoulder.

"I'm Yukina. My brother's name is Hiei. He sucks, because he knows I'm looking for my long-lost brother, and he REFUSES to admit it's HIM."

Hisses and boos met the blue-haired girl's words.

A monstrous, lizardy guy stood. "Hi. My name is Manten, and I hate my brother, Hiten, because he's much more attractive then me, he can fly, more women like him…AND HE HAS MORE HAIR THAN ME!!!" he broke out into sobs.

"Feh. I'm InuYasha. My half-brother's name is Sesshomaru. He's a cold, sadistic bastard, who claims to hate humans, yet the hypocrite travels with one. He wants to steal my Tetsusaiga, and he's almost killed Kagome more times than I can count!"

"Oh, InuYasha, I didn't know you cared!" Kagome squealed joyfully.

"Feh, I don't. But if you died, I couldn't find the jewel shards."

"SIT!!!"

"Uh, who are you?" Tao Jun asked.

"My name is Kagome Higurashi. I have a little brother named Souta. I hate him, because if it weren't for his wimpyness, I'd never have met him," she pointed at InuYasha, "and none of the physical and mental trauma I have suffered since would have occurred."

"Feh, spoiled little princess."

"S. I. T."

"Alrighty then, moving on. Who's next?"

A dark-haired boy stood and spoke in an emotionless monotone. "I am Sasuke Uchiha. My brother, Itachi, murdered my entire clan, except for me, and for that, I. Will. Kill. Him."

"But if he left you alive-"

"Shut up. He will DIE."

"NEXT!"

"Hi! My name's Katara! I have a brother, Sokka! He can get seriously annoying, with his lame jokes and stuff! I really wish he was less irritating!"

Tao Jun interrupted. "Katara, do you actually hate your brother?"

Katara blinked. "Uhhh…Yes?…No?…Maybe?"

"I think you should leave now."

Mokubah stood, but unfortunately, he was so short, it didn't really make a difference. "Hi, my name's Mokubah Kaiba." he said. Most of the girls in the room squee-ed (fangirl shriek) at his insane adorableness. "My big brother's name is Seto Kaiba. He's really rich, and he owns his own company, but when I got kidnapped, what did he do? He faked his own death, and then ENTERED A TRADING CARD TOURNAMENT!!!! My freaking GOD, he has to be the WORST guardian EVER. I might sue." Serenity nodded. "You poor kid, he sounds a lot like my brother."

"I AM THE CHAZ! The Chaz has two older brothers. They disowned the Chaz, and they tried to make him cheat at a trading card game! They have no shame…"

"I'm Syrus. I also have an older brother, Zane Truesdale. You might think that him having an almost-fatal heart attack would reduce his popularity. You'd be dead wrong…. Unlike Zane. He's much more popular than me. He's taller, more handsome, and a better duelist. And girls love him, despite his icy personality."

"ZANE!!!!" shrieked every single female in the room.

"SHUT. UP.!!!!" Sasuke yelled. "God, I hate fangirls…"

Yuki nodded in understanding. "Tell me about it. And they never go away." Sasuke and Yuki shuddered.

"Well, hello, my name is Yuki Sohma. Yes, I'm a guy, in case you were wondering. It's slightly harder to tell, with my elder brother, Ayame. He's arrogant, full of himself, flirts shamelessly with anything with a pulse, and if he shows up for 'brotherly bonding' ONE MORE TIME, I may just have to kill him…But it won't work…It never works…He just comes back, more annoying and gayer than ever…"

"That's not right." Kagome said.

Sasuke agreed with the miko. "It's really not…"

You can drop the act now, Sasu-kun. said a disembodied voice.

"Wha- Who said that? What act?" Sasuke looked around wildly.

I am the person writing this. And everyone knows you and Naruto secretly love each other with a deep burning passion. Now, I must continue the non-existent plot line of this story.

Yuki shook his head. "The one thing worse than fangirls."

"Rabid yaoi fan girls." everyone in the room said in unison.

"My name is Hao Asukura. In my new world order, all fangirls shall be sent to work in the mines. My brother is Yoh Asukura. He is the worst twin ever, because he's a troublesome do-gooder. He's always ruining my plans. He refuses to join me and take over the world. AND he won't give me his half of our soul! I mean, seriously, talk about unreasonable…"

Azula stared at him. "Oh my God, I think I just found my soul mate."

"Are you a shaman?" Hao asked.

"No, but I can control the element of fire."

Hao gaped. "I think I'm in love."

"God, get a room, you two." Sasuke muttered.

You're just jealous, because you an' Naruto haven't done anything yet. said the disembodied voice of the writer.

Sasuke scowled angrily. "Will. You. STOP?!? I AM NOT GAY!! Why the HELL did you come back anyway?!"

The writer shrugged. Sure, she's intangible, and can't be seen, but there was definite shrug -age. Just wrapping up the story. Tao Jun, if you would conclude the meeting?

"The first meeting of the 'I Hate My Brother' Society is now adjourned. Our next meetin- Hao, Azula, stop kissing and pay attention- our next meeting is next Friday. We'll be going over various ways to deal with our brothers. Katara, feel free not to come back."

"Actually, this was fun! I'm going to come ba-"

"No. Seriously, don't come back."

The writer sat back and looked at her work. Ah. A happy ending. Everyone loves a happy ending. What the- Katara, how'd YOU get in here?

"What are you talking about?!?! I got KICKED OUT! That hardly qualifies as 'happy'!!!"

I meant happy for everyone else. No one cares about you, Katara.

"My friends and family do…" Katara muttered sulkily.

Suuuure, they do. You keep telling yourself that. You just run along now, there's a good little water bender.