Hello! The following is a freaky fanfic written by me, Brittany! Why is it freaky? Hehehe you'll see! Why did I write this? Cuz I thought it was kinda funny + I was bored. I must warn you, IT'S REALLY REALLY STUPID! I hope u like it. I'll understand if u don't. I'm gonna mention my friend in this but 2 prevent embarrassment, I'll call her somethin else. Kay? Kay! Well, I guess I'll start now. Here we go! Oh! BTW, did I mention I now look exactly like Rachael from S Club 7 in this story? I took some polyjuice potion so now u can't say I can't look like her so hahahahaha!!! See how stupid this is? Ok, lets start:
Title: STOP HITTING ON HER!!!!
Part 1
Me (writing in my room): And so, Sirius became the hero, saving the day, and becoming the most popular character in the whole darn book like he always was supposed to be!
Sirius: I'm a hero?
Me acting as though fictional book characters frequently pop out of my fanfics into my room!: Of course! You deserve it! You're my fav character! You rock!
Sirius: Wow! Finally! Some recognition! Everyone cares if Harry's scar hurts one little bit, but would they care if I die? No!
Me: I know! That's so cheap!
Sirius: Yeah. So is my whole life! This stinks!
Harry: *coughs loudly* Excuse me but I think I'm supposed to be the hero!
Me: Hey! You get your name in the title every time so be happy! Peoples these days!
Sirius: Yeah I know!
Ron: Your hot!
Me: Errr, I dunno if I'll take that as a compliment, coming from a book character and all.
Hermione: I'm so smart! Oh yeah! I, um, *makes quotation marks /w hand* rock!
Me: No, Sirius rocks! You're just cool.
Sirius: Thank you!
Me: Your welcome!
Ron: I wish I weren't poor!
Me: I'd give you some money, but it's American, so I can't!
Ron: *sighs* That's ok.
Sirius: That was sweet
Me: Thanks!
Harry: Stop hitting on her! She's MINE!
Me: Whoa! Back off buddy! I ain't yours! Go get your chinese chick!
Ron: ha ha Harry!
Harry: Shut up!
Hermione: Now let's not fight guys!
Part 2
My radio: Who let the dogs out? Woof! Woof, woof, woof, woof!
Me: I LOVE this song!
Sirius: It sounds cool!
Harry: STOP HITTING ON HER! SHE'S MINE!
Sirius: I'm not hitting on her!
Me: Yeah! I know when I'm being hit on so shut up!
Ron: Ha ha!
Harry: *looks disgruntled* hmpf!
Dumbledore: Has anyone seen my lemon drops? I seem to have misplaced them!
Me: Errr, no…..
Sirius: Why would they be here in the first place?
Dumbledore: Well, you never know now a days!
Me: I guess. Settle for a Lemonhead? *hold out bag*
Dumbledore: Hmmmm, ok! *takes one and sucks on it*
Me: You guys want some? *hold out bag*
All besides Albus: Sure!
Dumbledore: Not as good, but alright!
Sirius: Don't you think that might be insulting?
Dumbledore: sorry
Me: *smile* It's ok!
Harry: STOP HITT-
Everyone else: SHUT UP! HE'S NOT!
My friend: Hey Brit! You're Rachael today? I some potion too! I'm Hannah!
(Hannah is her fav S Club 7 member!)
Me: Awesome! Wanna stay? I got company! *point @ HP peeps*
My friend who is now being reffered to as Hannah is also acting as though fictional book characters frequently pop out of my fanfics into my room!: Ok! Cool!
Ron: Your hot too!
Hannah: *blushes* Thanks!
Harry: I don't care if you hit on her! Just not-
All cept Harry: SHUT UP!
Ron: I'm not hitting on her!
Harry: Yeah, sure!
Sirius: Harry, Ron isn't hiting on her!
Harry: Look who's talking!
Me: Oh god!
Part 4
Voldemort: Hello all! Lovely day! Me & Peter are sight seeing!
Peter: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
All: *stare @ Peter except Sirius who tries to choke Peter*
Sirius: I'll kill you, you stupid murderer!
Peter: EEEEEEEE-choke-EEEEEEEE-gasp-EEEEEEEEEE-cough!!!!!
Me: Get him Sirius!
Voldemort: He thinks he's mini-me
All except Sirius: Ahhh…
Me: Get out of my room you filth! *push Peter out window*
Peter: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! *falling out window* "CRUNCH!"
All: EWWWWW!!!!!
All: YEAH!!!!
Voldemort: Remember Harry, I still have to kill you!
Harry: Yeah I know! Make yourself at home!
Me: Hey! You can't say who stays and who doesn't! This is my room! Remember?
Sirius: Yeah!
Harry: STOP HITTING ON HER!
All: SHUT UP ALREADY!
Voldemort: Oh, I'll go then.
Me: No! I say you can stay!
Harry: No, I-
All: SHUT UP!!!
Voldemort: All right!
Part 5
Spongebob Squarepants: Oh, crabby patty! You make the world taste better!
All: Spongebob Squarepants???
Me: GET OUT OF HERE YOU POROUS FREAK!
S.S.: WAAAAAHHHH!!!!! *dissapears*
All: YEAH!!!!
Hermione: Maybe your fanfic has a virius!
Me: I know, he's standing right there! *point in corner*
All cept me: Huh? *stare in corner*
Snape: What???
Sirius: SERVERUS! *stares despisingly*
Severus: SIRIUS! *he too stares despisingly*
Me: S CLUB!
All cept me & Hannah: Wha?
Me & Hannah: S Club 7????
All cept us: OH YEAH! Hahaha!
Snape: I'm getting the dementors Sirius! Maybe they'll give you a kiss!
Me: NO!!!!!!!
Sirius goes pale
Me: You ain't taking him!
Snape: No, I'll take you!
Sirius: No you won't!
Harry: (in sing-song tone) Hit-ting!
All: SHUT UP!
Snape: All these fanfics! I'm never in! Or if I am, I'm a loser!
Me: Well duh!
Snape: I'm not a loser! I rock!
Me: No, Sirius rocks!
Sirius: Thank you
Harry: Hit-
All: FOR THE LAST TIME, SHUT UP!
Part 6
Harry: Fine! If I can't have you, I'll have Hannah!
Hannah: Whoa buddy! I like Ron!
Ron: *gulp* Really???
Hannah: Yeah!
They hug
All cept them & Harry: AWWWWWW!!!!!!!
Harry: Well this stinks!
Cho: You can have me Harry!
All: WHAT????
Me: You back-stabbing git! What about Cedric? You can just toss him away huh?
Cho: Yeah! And I'll do the same with Harry when You-know-who gets him!
Voldemort: Hmm? Someone call me?
Harry: You! You!
Cho: What???
Harry & I: *nod at each other*
Me: Are going on a trip!
Harry & I: *push Cho out window*
Cho: AAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!! "CRUNCH!"
All: EWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!
All: YEAH!!!!!!!!
Part 7
Dumbledore: *sigh* I wish I could find my lemon drops!
Me: We'll tell you if we see them!
Dumbledore searches floor for lost lemon drops
Draco: When I tell my father-
All: SHUT UP!
Me: Go home you stupid Daddy's Boy!
Ron: Yeah! You little git!
Draco: WAAAAAHHHHH!!!!! *runs away*
All: YEAH!!!
Fudge: What's all this? What's all this then?
Me: FUDGE!
Dumbledore: No! I'm missing my lemon drops!
Me: No! Not food! Minister!
Dumbledore: Ohhhhh…….
Fudge: -gasp- SIRIUS BLACK!!!!
Me: Hey I know he rocks but-
Fudge: -gasp- CALL THE DEMENTORS! -choke- MY GOODNESS!!!
Snape: I tried!
All except Snape and Fudgy boy: SHUT UP!
Sirius: We all seem to be saying that a lot today, don't we?
Me: Yeah, I know!
Harry: STOP-
All: SHUT UP!
Sirius: Ah, there you go again!
Fudge: Oh my god!
Me & Hannah: Becky! Look at her butt!
All except Fudge: *crack up*
Part 8
Fudge: YOU-KNOW-WHO!!!
Voldemort: I'm very popular today, aren't I?
Me: You mean Voldemort?
Fudge: *flinch* Stop saying that!
Me: What? Voldemort?
Fudge: *flinch* Stop saying that!
Me: This is amusing! VOLDEMORT!
Fudge: *flinch* Stop!
Me: VOLDEMORT!
Fudge: *flinch* Stop!
Me: VOLDEMORT!
Fudge: *flinch* Stop!
I do this for about 5 times, enjoying it greatly.
Me: Alright Fudgy boy! I'll stop!
Voldemort: Oh! You all love my name so much! Say my name, say my name! When no one is around you say baby-
Me: I think we get the point!
Fudge: There are 4 murderers here! Sirius Black, You-know-who-
All cept Fudgy: VOLDEMORT!
Fudge falls down from shock.
All cept fallen Fudge: HA HA!
He gets back up
Fudge: and you and Harry for pushing people out of windows!
Me: Hey Harry? We sure did crack miss Fortune Cookie didn't we?
All cept Fudge: HA HA HA HA!
Part 9
Fudge: You know, I think all this is illegal!
Me: Duh! What was your first clue? Peoples these days!
Sirius: I know!
Harry: *opens mouth to speak*
All: SHUT UP!
Fudge: I don't like this all one bit!
All cept him: THEN GO HOME!
Fudge: Fine!
Me: C-ya bowler boy!
Fudge leaves
Radio: And I want you back!
Me: I LOVE this song even more! Oh my god I love this song!
Harry: Hey Sirius? Why don't you sing it to her?
Ron: Look who's talking!
Me: Oh! It ended! Darn it!
Sirius: Don't be sad!
Harry: I'm not saying ANYTHING!
Me: Thank you!
Voldemort: Can I sit down on your inflatable chair?
Me: Yeah ok. Just don't pop it!
Hermione: Your bed is comfy!
Me: Um, thanks! I guess….
Snape: Then I'm leaving!
Me: Adios! Get some Latino heat!
Me & Hanna start singing Eddy Guerrero's theme music
Us: Latino Heat! Latino Heat! Haha!
Radio: I look at her and she looks at me she's got me thinking about me constantly but she doesn't know how I feel
Me: I LOVE this song too! It's just my day, isn't it?
Sirius: cool song!
Harry: STILL not saying anything!
Me: No Harry! Say it! I miss saying SHUT UP!
Harry: ok! Sirius! STOP HITTING ON HER!
All: SHUT UP!
All: hahaha!
Part 10
Me: Ya know, I don't think this fanfic is ever gonna end!
Hermione: Must it end? It's rather enjoyable!
Me: Unfortunately, yes.
All: *great big sigh*
Me: But I can make a sequel!
All: YEAH!!!!!
Harry: I think we all have to go now!
All: AWWWWW!!!!!!!
All: BYE BRITTANY & HANNAH!!!!
Us: BYE!!!!!!
They all leave
Me: EXPECT A SEQUEL SOON!!!!!
All: KAY!!!!!!!!
The End!
Title: STOP HITTING ON HER!!!!
Part 1
Me (writing in my room): And so, Sirius became the hero, saving the day, and becoming the most popular character in the whole darn book like he always was supposed to be!
Sirius: I'm a hero?
Me acting as though fictional book characters frequently pop out of my fanfics into my room!: Of course! You deserve it! You're my fav character! You rock!
Sirius: Wow! Finally! Some recognition! Everyone cares if Harry's scar hurts one little bit, but would they care if I die? No!
Me: I know! That's so cheap!
Sirius: Yeah. So is my whole life! This stinks!
Harry: *coughs loudly* Excuse me but I think I'm supposed to be the hero!
Me: Hey! You get your name in the title every time so be happy! Peoples these days!
Sirius: Yeah I know!
Ron: Your hot!
Me: Errr, I dunno if I'll take that as a compliment, coming from a book character and all.
Hermione: I'm so smart! Oh yeah! I, um, *makes quotation marks /w hand* rock!
Me: No, Sirius rocks! You're just cool.
Sirius: Thank you!
Me: Your welcome!
Ron: I wish I weren't poor!
Me: I'd give you some money, but it's American, so I can't!
Ron: *sighs* That's ok.
Sirius: That was sweet
Me: Thanks!
Harry: Stop hitting on her! She's MINE!
Me: Whoa! Back off buddy! I ain't yours! Go get your chinese chick!
Ron: ha ha Harry!
Harry: Shut up!
Hermione: Now let's not fight guys!
Part 2
My radio: Who let the dogs out? Woof! Woof, woof, woof, woof!
Me: I LOVE this song!
Sirius: It sounds cool!
Harry: STOP HITTING ON HER! SHE'S MINE!
Sirius: I'm not hitting on her!
Me: Yeah! I know when I'm being hit on so shut up!
Ron: Ha ha!
Harry: *looks disgruntled* hmpf!
Dumbledore: Has anyone seen my lemon drops? I seem to have misplaced them!
Me: Errr, no…..
Sirius: Why would they be here in the first place?
Dumbledore: Well, you never know now a days!
Me: I guess. Settle for a Lemonhead? *hold out bag*
Dumbledore: Hmmmm, ok! *takes one and sucks on it*
Me: You guys want some? *hold out bag*
All besides Albus: Sure!
Dumbledore: Not as good, but alright!
Sirius: Don't you think that might be insulting?
Dumbledore: sorry
Me: *smile* It's ok!
Harry: STOP HITT-
Everyone else: SHUT UP! HE'S NOT!
My friend: Hey Brit! You're Rachael today? I some potion too! I'm Hannah!
(Hannah is her fav S Club 7 member!)
Me: Awesome! Wanna stay? I got company! *point @ HP peeps*
My friend who is now being reffered to as Hannah is also acting as though fictional book characters frequently pop out of my fanfics into my room!: Ok! Cool!
Ron: Your hot too!
Hannah: *blushes* Thanks!
Harry: I don't care if you hit on her! Just not-
All cept Harry: SHUT UP!
Ron: I'm not hitting on her!
Harry: Yeah, sure!
Sirius: Harry, Ron isn't hiting on her!
Harry: Look who's talking!
Me: Oh god!
Part 4
Voldemort: Hello all! Lovely day! Me & Peter are sight seeing!
Peter: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
All: *stare @ Peter except Sirius who tries to choke Peter*
Sirius: I'll kill you, you stupid murderer!
Peter: EEEEEEEE-choke-EEEEEEEE-gasp-EEEEEEEEEE-cough!!!!!
Me: Get him Sirius!
Voldemort: He thinks he's mini-me
All except Sirius: Ahhh…
Me: Get out of my room you filth! *push Peter out window*
Peter: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! *falling out window* "CRUNCH!"
All: EWWWWW!!!!!
All: YEAH!!!!
Voldemort: Remember Harry, I still have to kill you!
Harry: Yeah I know! Make yourself at home!
Me: Hey! You can't say who stays and who doesn't! This is my room! Remember?
Sirius: Yeah!
Harry: STOP HITTING ON HER!
All: SHUT UP ALREADY!
Voldemort: Oh, I'll go then.
Me: No! I say you can stay!
Harry: No, I-
All: SHUT UP!!!
Voldemort: All right!
Part 5
Spongebob Squarepants: Oh, crabby patty! You make the world taste better!
All: Spongebob Squarepants???
Me: GET OUT OF HERE YOU POROUS FREAK!
S.S.: WAAAAAHHHH!!!!! *dissapears*
All: YEAH!!!!
Hermione: Maybe your fanfic has a virius!
Me: I know, he's standing right there! *point in corner*
All cept me: Huh? *stare in corner*
Snape: What???
Sirius: SERVERUS! *stares despisingly*
Severus: SIRIUS! *he too stares despisingly*
Me: S CLUB!
All cept me & Hannah: Wha?
Me & Hannah: S Club 7????
All cept us: OH YEAH! Hahaha!
Snape: I'm getting the dementors Sirius! Maybe they'll give you a kiss!
Me: NO!!!!!!!
Sirius goes pale
Me: You ain't taking him!
Snape: No, I'll take you!
Sirius: No you won't!
Harry: (in sing-song tone) Hit-ting!
All: SHUT UP!
Snape: All these fanfics! I'm never in! Or if I am, I'm a loser!
Me: Well duh!
Snape: I'm not a loser! I rock!
Me: No, Sirius rocks!
Sirius: Thank you
Harry: Hit-
All: FOR THE LAST TIME, SHUT UP!
Part 6
Harry: Fine! If I can't have you, I'll have Hannah!
Hannah: Whoa buddy! I like Ron!
Ron: *gulp* Really???
Hannah: Yeah!
They hug
All cept them & Harry: AWWWWWW!!!!!!!
Harry: Well this stinks!
Cho: You can have me Harry!
All: WHAT????
Me: You back-stabbing git! What about Cedric? You can just toss him away huh?
Cho: Yeah! And I'll do the same with Harry when You-know-who gets him!
Voldemort: Hmm? Someone call me?
Harry: You! You!
Cho: What???
Harry & I: *nod at each other*
Me: Are going on a trip!
Harry & I: *push Cho out window*
Cho: AAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!! "CRUNCH!"
All: EWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!
All: YEAH!!!!!!!!
Part 7
Dumbledore: *sigh* I wish I could find my lemon drops!
Me: We'll tell you if we see them!
Dumbledore searches floor for lost lemon drops
Draco: When I tell my father-
All: SHUT UP!
Me: Go home you stupid Daddy's Boy!
Ron: Yeah! You little git!
Draco: WAAAAAHHHHH!!!!! *runs away*
All: YEAH!!!
Fudge: What's all this? What's all this then?
Me: FUDGE!
Dumbledore: No! I'm missing my lemon drops!
Me: No! Not food! Minister!
Dumbledore: Ohhhhh…….
Fudge: -gasp- SIRIUS BLACK!!!!
Me: Hey I know he rocks but-
Fudge: -gasp- CALL THE DEMENTORS! -choke- MY GOODNESS!!!
Snape: I tried!
All except Snape and Fudgy boy: SHUT UP!
Sirius: We all seem to be saying that a lot today, don't we?
Me: Yeah, I know!
Harry: STOP-
All: SHUT UP!
Sirius: Ah, there you go again!
Fudge: Oh my god!
Me & Hannah: Becky! Look at her butt!
All except Fudge: *crack up*
Part 8
Fudge: YOU-KNOW-WHO!!!
Voldemort: I'm very popular today, aren't I?
Me: You mean Voldemort?
Fudge: *flinch* Stop saying that!
Me: What? Voldemort?
Fudge: *flinch* Stop saying that!
Me: This is amusing! VOLDEMORT!
Fudge: *flinch* Stop!
Me: VOLDEMORT!
Fudge: *flinch* Stop!
Me: VOLDEMORT!
Fudge: *flinch* Stop!
I do this for about 5 times, enjoying it greatly.
Me: Alright Fudgy boy! I'll stop!
Voldemort: Oh! You all love my name so much! Say my name, say my name! When no one is around you say baby-
Me: I think we get the point!
Fudge: There are 4 murderers here! Sirius Black, You-know-who-
All cept Fudgy: VOLDEMORT!
Fudge falls down from shock.
All cept fallen Fudge: HA HA!
He gets back up
Fudge: and you and Harry for pushing people out of windows!
Me: Hey Harry? We sure did crack miss Fortune Cookie didn't we?
All cept Fudge: HA HA HA HA!
Part 9
Fudge: You know, I think all this is illegal!
Me: Duh! What was your first clue? Peoples these days!
Sirius: I know!
Harry: *opens mouth to speak*
All: SHUT UP!
Fudge: I don't like this all one bit!
All cept him: THEN GO HOME!
Fudge: Fine!
Me: C-ya bowler boy!
Fudge leaves
Radio: And I want you back!
Me: I LOVE this song even more! Oh my god I love this song!
Harry: Hey Sirius? Why don't you sing it to her?
Ron: Look who's talking!
Me: Oh! It ended! Darn it!
Sirius: Don't be sad!
Harry: I'm not saying ANYTHING!
Me: Thank you!
Voldemort: Can I sit down on your inflatable chair?
Me: Yeah ok. Just don't pop it!
Hermione: Your bed is comfy!
Me: Um, thanks! I guess….
Snape: Then I'm leaving!
Me: Adios! Get some Latino heat!
Me & Hanna start singing Eddy Guerrero's theme music
Us: Latino Heat! Latino Heat! Haha!
Radio: I look at her and she looks at me she's got me thinking about me constantly but she doesn't know how I feel
Me: I LOVE this song too! It's just my day, isn't it?
Sirius: cool song!
Harry: STILL not saying anything!
Me: No Harry! Say it! I miss saying SHUT UP!
Harry: ok! Sirius! STOP HITTING ON HER!
All: SHUT UP!
All: hahaha!
Part 10
Me: Ya know, I don't think this fanfic is ever gonna end!
Hermione: Must it end? It's rather enjoyable!
Me: Unfortunately, yes.
All: *great big sigh*
Me: But I can make a sequel!
All: YEAH!!!!!
Harry: I think we all have to go now!
All: AWWWWW!!!!!!!
All: BYE BRITTANY & HANNAH!!!!
Us: BYE!!!!!!
They all leave
Me: EXPECT A SEQUEL SOON!!!!!
All: KAY!!!!!!!!
The End!