"John, do you… miss anything?"
"Um… What?"
"You gave up women for me, so I just wondered if I… 'do it' for you?"
"Do what, exactly, for me? God knows you don't do the shopping, the dishes or anything else that one flatmate might reasonably expect another flatmate to do!"
"I mean, do you think I'm missing any essential thing that you liked about women."
"It's all fine. I love everything we do together."
"But you do miss… things that women have that I don't."
"Such as conversation, social skills and a Hoover?"
"John! I want to know if you miss breasts."
"Breasts."
"Yes."
"Just checking we are talking about the same thing. I mean, you are the one who observed in the first place that all my relationships with women ended. Most of them, spectacularly badly. I was due for a change."
"So you might… change back?"
"Start fancying breasts again, you mean?"
"Well… yes."
"Come here and kiss me, you enormous idiot."
"…"
"You have a fabulous body part that I admire immensely, and which no-one else in the whole world has or can ever compete with. I want to follow it around and be impressed by it for the rest of my life."
"Really? You like my arse that much?"
"No! I'm talking about your incredible, magnificent, brilliant brain!"