The Bravest Man I Ever Knew
The dormitory was bathed in afternoon sunlight and a rosy glow fell across the room, illuminating its' scarlet hangings and bedspreads. Two boys were sprawled on opposite four posters. They had been so exhausted that they had not even pulled the curtain hangings around them and were sleeping in the brightness.
But not for long. Harry blinked as the sunlight from a nearby window tore at his closed eyelids, forcing them to open. He sat up. He did not have the faintest idea how long he had slept for, but he no longer felt exhausted. On the contrary, his heart leapt as a singular thought coursed through his mind, it was over. He could not remember the last time he had woken up and not been plagued about defeating Voldemort. No more Voldemort, no more Horcruxes, no more war...the war...his heart wrenched as he remembered the dead combatants, lying in the entrance hall. They had died...for him...
He reached for his glasses from the bedside table and put them on slowly, trying to assuage the surge of guilt inside him. If only it had been different. He'd never wanted anyone to die for him. His heart ached for Teddy Lupin, who was an orphan now...like himself...I'll take care of him, he thought fiercely. He would not let Teddy go through the same childhood that he had, alone and unloved...
He wondered if the portrait of Snape would be up yet in the Headmaster's Office. He remembered that he had seen Dumbledore's portrait there within very few hours of his death and was surprised that he had not seen Snape's earlier when he had visited the office. It was time to check once again.
Then he swung his legs over his bed and stood up, grabbing the invisibility cloak off his bedside table and flung it over himself. He felt like some peace and quiet as he walked through the corridors. He'd felt overwhelmed earlier on in the Great Hall, where everyone was screaming, congratulating him and questioning him at once.
The common room was deserted, as Harry had expected. Most of the students would still be downstairs in the Great Hall, some grieving the loss of their loved ones, some still celebrating Voldemort's downfall. He strode out of the portrait hole, and purposefully directed his steps to Dumbledore's office.
He had reached his destination, but was now feeling slightly apprehensive. What was he going to say to Snape's portrait? Obviously he wanted to thank him, but he had a feeling he would not be able to find the right words. The man always made him feel on edge. How was he supposed to have a civil conversation with him?
He waited patiently as the moving stairwell gradually took him to the polished wooden door which he knew to be the entrance to Dumbledore's office. He pushed open the door and walked inside, glancing around the office for Snape. He was disappointed however; none of the occupants in the portraits appeared to be there. All were evidently in other parts of the castle, quite possibly the Great Hall, probably celebrating.
He sighed and slowly took off his invisibility cloak and draped it on the chair across Dumbledore's desk, in which he had sat many a time. He then turned to sit down for perhaps a final time. It would be a long wait, he mused.
Apparently not. He had just sat down, when a voice behind him spoke. 'Potter.'
He leapt to his feet and whirled around, recognising the voice. It was Snape. He peered at Snape closely and tried to smile at him. The man looked none the worse for his snake bite, his hair appeared to be greasy even in the oil painting and his sneer was firmly in place. But rather than feeling a surge of anger at the sight of his sneer, Harry felt relieved at the familiarity of the expression. He was not sure what he had been expecting. The last time he had had a face to face conversation with Snape, they both had been screaming abuses and he had been trying to curse Snape into oblivion.
He approached the portrait cautiously, trying to think of what to say first. However, Snape spoke before he could.
'Congratulations, Potter. The Dark Lord has fallen at last,' he said silkily.
Harry simply stared, dumbfounded. Had Snape just complimented him?
'Er...' he began awkwardly.
'Eloquent as always, Potter,' Snape smirked.
Harry felt the colour rising in his cheeks. The man just could not converse without his snide comments.
'I don't know what to say,' he began, glancing behind him in the hope that Dumbledore had returned to his portrait and might help their conversation proceed further. But there was no such luck.
'You've been so brave...helped me so much...protected me so much...thank you...' he croaked.
To his surprise, the sneer twisting Snape's thin mouth was replaced by a scowl.
'Don't thank me, Potter. I did it for Lily.' Snape said gruffly.
There was a long silence, in which Harry stared at his own feet, wondering what to say next.
Finally, Snape broke the silence. 'Your courage and skill... were...admirable, to say the least.' he said quietly.
Harry stared, astonished for the second time in a span of five minutes. Had Snape changed?
There was another long pause.
'I'm sorry for calling you a coward.' Harry said finally. The sudden demented look that had appeared on Snape's features when he had called him that last year had just sprung to his mind again. At that time he had felt a surge of vindictive pleasure for finally getting to Snape, but now he just felt repulsed by what he had said. It must have hurt the man more deeply than he could have imagined.
Snape inclined his head. Maybe Harry was imagining it, but he thought Snape was beginning to look rather bored. He felt rather irritated. Surely it was more interesting talking to his most hated student compared to staring idly around an empty office? Maybe he had not changed.
He did not know what he had expected. Perhaps he had hoped Snape would be different now that he had revealed the truth about his past, now that he was dead but apparently that was not the case.
He decided to wrap up the conversation. If it could be called one. They had barely said anything to each other.
'I know we've never been on the best of terms, but I do appreciate what you've done, you're the bravest man-'
'Don't mention it, Potter,' said Snape quietly, looking rather embarrassed.
'Yes. Well. I'm going to try and get you cleared off all charges,' said Harry, motioning to the pensieve. He suddenly wondered whether Snape would be angry if he used his pensieve memories as evidence. Would he prefer them to remain confidential? There was no telling with this man.
'That would be appreciated,' Snape murmured.
'I'll see that you get a proper burial. Is there any place you prefer?' asked Harry.
'Hogwarts.'
Another long silence. Harry was feeling more and more uncomfortable each minute.
'Well...I'd better be going, then,' he said edging away towards the chair to grab his invisibility cloak once again.
Snape smirked again. 'No, we would not want the hero tomiss any more of the celebrations,' he said snidely.
Harry felt his temper rise. So he was back to the 'hero' was he?
'Why aren't you at the celebrations?' he demanded.
Snape rolled his eyes. 'If you haven't noticed, Potter, I am dead and unable to-'
Harry glared at Snape. Why was it that he had to be a complete arse even when he was dead?
'Bye then,' he said, turning away from the portrait.
He was right near the door when he walked back to the portrait on an impulse. 'Give my love to my mother,' he said quietly. 'I never thanked them...for their support...' his voice trailed off.
Snape was silent for a long moment, his head bent. When he raised his head finally, Harry could see tears glistening in the Professor's eyes. 'I will,' he whispered. 'Provided that she forgives me.'
'Of course she will,' said Harry, his own eyes beginning to fill with tears.
''If it were not for me, she would still be alive,' said Snape harshly.
Harry shook his head, unable to bear the intense guilt written over the man's face.
'He - Voldemort – he'd have found out some other way. You made a – a mistake, I'm sure she'll forgive you for - for protecting me...' he could not go on.
Wiping his eyes with the sleeve of his robe, Harry walked away from the portrait once again and opened the door. He was about to leave when -
'I hope you find it in your heart to forgive me, Potter.' Snape spoke so quietly that Harry thought he had misheard for a second.
Harry found he had nothing to say to this. Forgive Snape for what? All those years of torture? For telling Voldemort to go after his mother and father?
He found that whatever Snape did in the past, it was more than compensated by his acts later on. He wouldn't be able to hate his memory after everything Snape had done for him...the Order.
'I forgive you,' he whispered and let the door close behind him.
A/N: Please read and review!!! Thanks :)