I own nothing. Title comes from the song by Lady Antebellum. Sara Shepard owns PLL. Lady Antebellum owns Things People Say. You know how it goes. Just to make it clear, the influence of the song will show more in the next chapter than this one. Google the lyrics/youtube the song for clarity. Three-shot at most. Maybe a sequel if it's asked for. Don't hate me, y'all.
Aria stood by the printer with a cup of coffee warming her hands, watching the printer spit out a sheaf of paper. This was about the most important thing she'd ever printed, as it comprised her entire application to study Shakespeare in England. Finally the printing slowed before the last page was released to the stack, and she gathered it all up, coffee forgotten, as she combed through every page, making sure everything was there.
Satisfied that all was in place, she left the computer lab and returned to her dorm. As a college senior at New York University, she had come to realize that although she might want to be a writer, it wasn't necessarily the most practical career-many writers struggled for years before publishing anything. Spencer had suggested she find something she was equally as passionate about to work at while writing, so she at least had a source of income. Aria had taken her advice to heart and was now applying to do a doctorate in Shakespeare, so she could teach and write on the side. The idea was that she would start getting published with Shakespeare-related articles and books so she could build up a professional reputation, then try her hand at publishing a piece of creative writing.
Ezra, however, had not been thrilled by this idea. He had suggested that Aria try writing a novel during college and building up her reputation that way: however, she found it difficult to write when she had more pressing deadlines to meet. When Aria had broached the idea of England with Ezra, he hadn't seemed to understand why she'd want to go overseas. Even when Aria pointed out that the program she specifically wanted to do was there, he had asked her if she couldn't find something a little closer to home.
Angered by this lack of support, Aria had decided to apply anyway and tell Ezra only if she got in. Even if he didn't support her, her family and friends did. And her professors encouraged her, suggesting that she could even gain a scholarship to go.
In short, it was a fantastic opportunity, and Aria was disappointed that Ezra wasn't supporting her more.
She finished collating her application and filling out the necessary forms. Her recommendations, transcripts, personal statement, the essay about why she wanted to study at Oxford: it was all there. She slid it all into the envelope, labelled it with the most careful writing she could and sealed it all.
A knock at the door interrupted her reverie, and she hurried to hide the envelope in case it was Ezra-even the prospect of her going to England was a sore spot between them, and they'd already had a few rows over it. It always came down to the same thing: while Aria wanted to go overseas, Ezra wanted them both to stay in America.
At times like this the age gap between them bugged Aria, as it reminded her that Ezra had already travelled and presumably didn't want to again. The thing was, she hadn't travelled much since returning from Iceland, and she was keen to get out and see more of the world.
Luckily, it was Spencer, reminding Aria that they'd had shopping plans today with Emily and Hanna. Spencer looked overcaffeinated as always, bouncing on her heels slightly as she watched Aria gather her things and then pick up a thick envelope.
"Is that what I think it is?" she wondered, then brightened as Aria showed her the mailing address with OXFORD UNIVERSITY prominent on the front of the envelope.
Aria nodded, "I decided that Ezra isn't going to tell me what to do or where I can or can't go to do a doctorate. If I get in I'll tell him, but if I don't, then I won't. And of course, you and the girls won't tell anyone, so no-one else will know."
Spencer nodded her approval as they walked outside to meet the others at Hanna's car, Aria lingering to slip the envelope into the mail before joining them.
During the drive the four discussed their after-graduation plans: Spencer, to go to law school; Emily to gain her Master's in adolescent psychology while swimming on the side and Hanna, to try to start up her own boutique. Already, Hanna had a fledgling jewellery line and designed and sewed clothes for her friends.
None of them mentioned Ezra's disapproval of Aria's plan to go to England, if they would have her, and she didn't ask any further advice. All three of them had already given her the best advice they could, and it had culminated in her decision to follow her heart.
Upon returning to her dorm, Aria began organizing everything she had to start doing as the semester wound down. With two months before graduation, she had finished all her post-grad applications. That was the good news, she realized, as she logged into her emails to find reminders about essays due before the exam period and notices about what needed to be done before moving out of the dorm.
She started organizing what she had done so far, collecting up her notes for the Nabokov essay she had yet to start, before moving herself and her books to the library.
Four hours later, she had an essay outline, a very rough draft and a page of quotes to use. As she walked back to her room, she began mentally planning everything out. With a sinking heart, she realized that she was going to have to work almost completely solidly for the next two months to get everything finished on time, which meant she couldn't spend much time with Ezra.
On second thought, that wasn't the worst thing, if it meant she didn't have to worry about accidentally telling him.
~~~~ (7 weeks later)
With just a week left until graduation, Aria was beginning to freak out.
She'd completed all her assignments and handed them all in. Her exams were all over, and she'd stripped the majority of her things from her dorm and shipped them back home.
Out of the eight programs she'd applied to, she had heard from seven. Getting into five of them was great, and everyone had been pleased for her. The reason for her freak-out was that she had yet to hear from Oxford, who she most wanted to hear back from.
She ran back to her mailbox for what felt like the millionth time that day, and was about to return to her room when the mail guy called her name. He handed her the heavy envelope with the Oxford insignia, and she tore back upstairs to find the girls waiting in her room.
She felt frozen, paralyzed by her uncertainty. This letter was thick, which tended towards good news, but maybe Oxford was in the habit of sending really long rejection letters. Hanna, never one for patience, grabbed the envelope and slit it open, shoving it back at Aria.
Dear Aria,
On behalf of the University of Oxford's Faculty of English, we are pleased to offer you a place…
Aria couldn't help it-she screamed.
Spencer snatched the papers from her hand and read out loud, then flipped over to the next page. "Holy shit…"
Emily and Hanna pounced on her, reading over her shoulder. "We would also like to offer you the Dean's Scholarship for achievement, which will cover all fees and course-related expenses for the duration of your course."
~~~~ (2 weeks later)
Directly after graduation, Aria and the others had flown back to Rosewood to spend time with family. Aria had broken the news to her family over dinner, and everyone had encouraged her to take the opportunity. So far, she was leaning towards definitely taking it, but there was one last obstacle.
Ezra.
As soon as she said England, he'd be mad. Mad that she applied, mad that she was thinking of going and probably mad that she wanted to go.
He was due back in Rosewood tomorrow, and they had already arranged to meet for dinner. She'd have to break the news to him then, maybe if they were in a public setting they wouldn't get into another argument.
The time passed quickly for Aria, who was by now dreading dinner. Since she'd been gone from Rosewood, even more fancy restaurants had popped up. Not only would she have to break the news to him, she'd have to do so in an expensive restaurant and get all dressed up. Somehow, it didn't seem an even trade.
The next evening she pulled on a generic black dress and black heels. She ran the brush quickly through her hair and did her makeup in a rush, wanting to get the whole night over and done with.
Ezra picked her up, and complimented her on her outfit, although she barely heard him. As always he looked adorable, in a suit and tie that matched for once. He seemed to have made more effort than she did, which just made her feel worse. Normally, she loved to go out and get dressed up, especially if doing so meant spending time with Ezra.
Today though, telling him the one thing that could possibly break his heart was ruining any enjoyment she might have had.
As she got out the car, walked into the restaurant and sat at their table, she felt like she was moving underwater. Ezra finally seemed to pick up on her mood, and sent the waitress away before they ordered.
"I have to tell you something that you're not going to like at all… I got into Oxford's doctorateprogramandI'mgoing". The words spilled out in a rush, as if saying them faster would make them any less true.
Judging by the stunned look on Ezra's face, he'd heard every word clearly and didn't know what to say.
Evidently he was in denial about it, because they managed to have dinner without arguing. As he walked her inside, she felt a little like she'd just dodged a bullet. Of course, not talking about it now meant they'd have to talk about it tomorrow.
The worst part of it was that her flight the next day.
Ezra dragged himself out of bed at six A.M. the next day. All night he'd been tossing and turning and trying to make sense of the bombshell Aria had dropped last night. Maybe it had been some stupid joke, although Aria wasn't one for practical jokes. After he'd suggested that she find a program in America, he'd been sure that she would.
Hanna might have put her up to it… that could have explained it, although she looked completely serious. Aria had never been good at lying.
He decided there was only one thing left for it-go and talk to her. And if she was insistent on going, he wasn't going to argue. If you love someone, set them free…
With that, he showered, got dressed and ran out the door in record time. Aria's flat wasn't too far, but he'd drive anyway, just to try to clear his head.
When he got there, there was no answer despite his alternating between leaning on the doorbell and knocking. Looking around, he realized that there were no cars in the driveway and the place was silent. By now it was eight-thirty, and it wasn't unreasonable to think she and the others had gone out for breakfast.
A little after nine, he was still waiting when Spencer's car pulled up. All four of the girls were in it, and he felt a sudden wave of anger. He'd waited forty-five minutes-why hadn't Aria at least called?
She lagged behind the others, seeming not to want him there.
Of course she wants you here. You're just being paranoid, he tried to convince himself. At the back of his mind though, there was a nagging feeling that something wasn't right.
He followed her inside, waiting until they were in her room to start talking. It surprised him that all her stuff was still in boxes, not unpacked. A quick glance around the room revealed it was more than that: she only had a suitcase open and a few clothes in it. Evidently, she was living out of a suitcase. The nagging feeling became outright uneasiness, and he got the sense that her living arrangement here was only temporary.
Business-like, she opened the box labelled BOOKS and removed a stack, transferring them to a suitcase. Moving around the room, she repeated this method with clothes and a few personal things before turning to face him.
"I meant what I said last night. I'm moving to England to get a doctorate in Shakespeare. I didn't tell you I applied in case I didn't get in. I already accepted the place they offered" Her words were mechanical and oddly detached, as if she was watching herself performing on a stage.
The uneasiness intensified as he studied her face, trying to read her thoughts. "You know that if you go, I won't be coming with you? If you leave, it's over between us."
She nodded silently, trying to speak around the emotion. Finally, she shook her head and blinked: any emotion previously on her face was now gone and her eyes were cold.
"My flight leaves tonight. I should finish packing."
With that she turned away from him and began piling more clothes into a suitcase, then collected random makeup and dumped it into her bag.
He watched her pack for a few minutes more before he turned and walked out, slamming the door behind him.
Aria planned to get the bus to the airport: it would save the trouble of paying for parking and finding somewhere to park. She reminded the girls which bus stop she'd need to be dropped off at and when, and they agreed to take her there together. She didn't want any grand farewell scenes at the airport, she just wanted to say goodbyes and get gone before she got the chance to change her mind.
Ezra paced his apartment, furious at himself. He'd just let her go, not fighting it at all. The real estate brochure he'd picked up the other day caught his eye, and he flipped through roughly, tearing the pages. He'd thought he and Aria could pick out a house together, something small at first, then find something bigger. Have a family.
That was gone now.
Unless… What time did her flight leave? She hadn't said, but it was a safe bet that the girls would know. Probably they'd be the ones taking her. At the least they'd be going to say goodbye.
He raced back to the flat the girls were sharing just as they pulled back into the driveway, minus Aria.
"We just dropped her off at the bus station opposite the pharmacy, the one just up the road," Spencer said before he had to ask.
He thanked her and ran, grateful that he was in the habit of running often. Please don't let her be gone… please don't let her be gone…
Luck was clearly on his side as he got to the bus stop in question, as she was the only one at the bus stop. Her bags were nearly stacked, and she was watching straight ahead.
"Don't go. Please."
She turned to him, seeming to look straight through him. He felt oddly self-conscious under her gaze, feeling like she was assessing him for something. Somehow he had the feeling that if he was being assessed, he wasn't passing. As he waited for her answer, he realized he was holding his breath.
She sighed and shook her head. "It's over, remember? You said yourself that if I left, it was over."
"I know I did. But I made a mistake. We don't need to break up. I'm begging you to stay. Can we work this out? Baby, we can work this out. Please, just don't go. Stay here in Rosewood."
Maybe if I get down on my knees and beg…would she stay then?
Probably not…
The roar of an approaching bus cut him off as he was about to speak, and she stepped to the kerb to flag it down. As it pulled up to the stop, she swivelled around, grabbed her things and stepped on. He watched her pay the driver and the driver laugh at something she said before she took a seat facing forward.
The bus pulled away from the kerb as he watched, the tight feeling in his chest and throat making it hard to breathe. The exhaust fumes surrounded him, but he barely noticed-any other time, he would have covered his face until the fumes cleared.
Finally the bus disappeared from view and he turned and left. Once in his apartment, his stupidity hit him. He'd thought they had so many plans together, when really they were no more than his plans and dreams. He'd never thought to share them with Aria, and now he hated himself for it. If I had told her what I wanted for us in the future, maybe she would have stayed, he reflected.
Aria watched the scenery race past as the bus made its way to the airport. Strangely, she didn't feel so bad about leaving Ezra. They'd been together for so long and were at different stages in their lives and what they wanted.
The journey to the airport was quick, traffic was good, and she was early for her flight. She paused to peruse the magazines and books on offer and got her tickets. It occurred to her that all these mundane activities led up to something bigger, and suddenly she was almost grateful she'd left Ezra.
Finally the words she'd been wanting to hear: Flight 675 to London, England, now boarding. I repeat, flight 675 to London, England is now boarding. Please make your way to the boarding gate and have your passport and ticket ready.
She gathered her stuff and, after someone ahead of her had some problems with their ticket, she boarded the plane.
Ezra sat in his apartment, the ticking of the clock the only noise in the silent room. Three whiskeys had done nothing to numb the pain, only his thoughts. The problem was, he was barely thinking anything but the one question.
What went wrong?