Accidentally In Love
Once upon a time, in the land of Mary-Sue… Holly Beckett-Mary-Sue has an accident during a routine science experiment and is flung from the world of perfection into the land of Fan-Fiction. While jumping from genre to genre, Holly must try and find away home before the stories become repetitive, monotonous and down right boring. This would cause the ratings to plummet and the plug pulled on this capper through many-a-spoof and Holly would be stuck… FOREVER.
A/N: I do not own anything... My therapist just suggested that this might stop my addiction to all things Sue! It's an improvement, believe me- I used to be one! Lol Enjoy, please don't be offended.
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Justine Grape-Mary-Sue's convertible BMW was on auto-pilot across the deserted dusty road, enabling her to concentrate on perfecting her award-winning smile. Perfect teeth and a nose that was flawless. Her glasses were not geeky, despite the real-life connotations and name-calling. It just so happens that the writer wears glasses and would like bi-spectacle people to be "cool".
Justine, the long-legged brunette, top of her year at Saint Clarice Mary-Sue High, was on her way to meet the mayor of Sue City on the idea about releasing men back into the wild when a purple glow upon the horizon reflected upon the lens of her glasses causing her to smudge her nail varnish.
The next moment, the comm. Pad signalled an incoming message from her science base over where the glow was emitting. Coincidence? Justine would probably think so if she knew the meaning of the word or its meaning within the plot.
Justine did not like to think like that, she hated the idea that a plot could revolve around a purple haze rather than a Sue.
"Justine Grape-Mary-Sue here." Justine informed brightly as she pressed the big round answer button. It seemed that many an accident was cause by Sue's who were unable to locate the answer button, or even determine the source of the incoming beacon and therefore this latest model was pasted with giant buttons.
"Justine Grape-Mary-Sue sorry to disturb you but it's Holly Beckett-Mary-Sue. Her new Prada shoe broke in the grating and she fell into that thingy that you and her were working on- and urm-"
"-What's the problem Keria Grebo-Trest-Mary-Sue the third?" Justine watched the blonde woman's eyes glaze over and threaten to tear. She stopped almost as suddenly, perhaps it was the mascara she was wearing. Although it gave Keria killer lashes the first sign of moisture resulted in the not so glamorous panda eyes.
"While trying to get her out, erm, Trisha Mary-Sue-Kent-Mary-Sue was distracted by one of the buttons and well, we don't know what's happening but Holly's clothes are extremely drab." Too late, water fluttered down from Keria's eyes and covered her face with black glop.
"I'll be right there." Justine fumed as she transferred the car to autopilot. She didn't have a permit to drive ever since she killed a rare breed of male as he was trying to cross the road. Since that incident all males had been kept in captivity under a special breeding programme. If she was caught driving manually she would loose her members pass into the man-zoo and would loose the choice of the top ten studs. Brad Pitt was too much of a sacrifice.
Riddled with guilt from running over the rare male, Justine decided to complete a highly complex science degree in two weeks, which, by-god she did, and she set about creating a time-travel device which would allow the Mary-Sue civilisation to go about repopulating Sue-City with desirable men. Including those rare ones killed by drooling.
Now, Holly Beckett-Mary-Sue had gotten herself trapped inside the time-travel phone box without authorisation and the programme had been started without the proper tests or experiments. The truth was Justine didn't know where Holly would end up, Or even if she would be able to get home.
Stepping into the compound, the light seemed much brighter. This was one thing she had not predicted. Perhaps it had been a bad idea to re-paint the scrapped phone box with illegal paint that was banned because of its harmful chemicals. But it did make the device funky and could be an accessory for almost any outfit.
Who ever heard of dangerous accessories?
"Holly!" Justine rattled the phone boxes doors. No use. Holly's Parda heel had jammed the door shut. Looking up, Justine felt feint. Holly's make-up had been removed and she was now wearing velvet. It was totally last season. "What have I done to you?"
"It's not your fault Justine." Holly attempted to remove her heels from the door once more… hang on, they weren't hers.
"-They're mine!" Justine howled. "It's your own bloody fault. They make your ankles look fat. And you've broken them. Do you realise-" Justine began to shout at her friend as the light turned from a purple to a deep red. There was no saving her now.
"-Just find a way to get me home-" And with that last request Holly was gone, to be forgotten five minutes later when the memory cycle of a Sue began again.
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Holly's head buzzed as she landed sprawled on the cold floor of a space ship's cargo bay, her hand clutched to her forehead. She looked down at her tangled body. A black jump-suit, thankfully it showed of her sculptured body perfectly, even if the colour wasn't great.
She picked herself up from the floor. Her walk was different, mainly because she was not used to flats. She had been born in heels. Time to find out where she was, Holly began walking.
Crate after crate of dull red metal. When would she find one bright enough to see her reflection? She could not go meeting people if her make-up was not perfect.
There, over by the door was a shiny black console. Her reflection must be distorted because that was not her staring back. Or was it just her memory playing tricks, because she could have sworn she didn't have long red hair. And she was certain the spots running down either of her face and down beneath the top of her jump-suit weren't hers.
"Can you please step away from the console!" it wasn't a request. The cargo bay doors had opened with a hiss and what appeared to be a security crew had stepped inside. Weapons pointed at poor Holly's face. "Why are you wearing a Starfleet uniform?" The dark skinned man with pointy ears mono-toned.
"Er….." Holly had no idea. She didn't even know where she was, there because of a writer's whim.
"There is no telaxian registered as a member of this crew." The man stated blandly.
"I've just come aboard." Holly explained flippantly, hoping a little flirtation could win the situation.
"That much is obvious." He allowed two men to move to either side of the traumatised Holly.
"From my home-world; I've been assigned to your vessel." Holly suggested hesitantly.
"Extremely unlikely."
"And why is that?" Holly asked, gaining a little of her confidence.
"Because we are seventy light-years away from home; there is no way a Mary-Sue character can spontaneously appear unless you are a species of the delta quadrant which you're clearly not."
"Oh boy!" Holly exclaimed wondering how she could get out of the pickle she was in.