…And More
Jim led Spock straight to his room, getting a shiver down his spine every time he looked backward to meet eyes with the other. He was pretty damn certain that a non-intoxicated Spock wouldn't be looking at him with lust so obviously written on his face, so just seeing this was setting all of Jim's nerves on end.
He still couldn't believe this was happening. It was Spock's idea. Spock's. None of this would be happening under normal circumstances, so he wondered briefly if he should put a stop to this, due to Spock's inebriation, but one more look into those deep and intense eyes quickly made him rethink it.
It didn't matter how bad an idea this was. He didn't want to stop. Not with Spock looking at him like that. He'd deal with the consequences tomorrow, because thinking about anything past how devastatingly sexy the Vulcan looked was far too trying on his brain.
Finally, the two of them reached Jim's quarters and he entered the code to let the both of them in. As soon as the door shut them safely inside the room, Spock approached him and ran two fingers down Jim's cheek and neck in a slightly clumsy way due to his drunkenness, and he spoke in a low tone, "I have desired this for a long time, Jim."
Jim definitely found Spock's imprecision even hotter, and he let out a sigh at the caress, softly agreeing, "Yeah...me too."
Suddenly an idea struck Jim and he smirked, "Just wait a second, I just thought of something."
He hurried over to one of his shelves and he pulled something out. He looked at Spock's face, realizing the other already seemed to know what was inside the box he was holding, thanks to his Vulcan sense of smell. His smirk grew as he opened the box.
It was a box of valentines chocolates that one of his many admirers left him anonymously. He hadn't really planned on eating it or anything, but this was definitely an opportunity that would be well enjoyed. Perhaps not in the way that his anonymous sender intended, but this idea was too good to pass up.
Spock seemed to carefully regard the chocolate box, and his lips twitched upward in the sexiest almost smirk that Jim had ever seen on Spock's face. Oh yeah, this was totally going to happen now. Any doubts he had about taking advantage of his tipsy First Officer were dashed by that look on the other's face.
He raised a teasing eyebrow at Spock and he gestured to the box, saying, "Want some?"
Spock chose to look at Jim instead of the chocolate as he answered, "Yes."
That caused Jim to shiver and then he reached into the box to get one out, and he carefully squished it between his fingers. The chocolate had already started to melt due to the warmth of his fingers, and squishing it caused it to spread significantly over his fingertips.
At Spock's questioning eyebrow, Jim gave him a mischievous grin and reply, "Would you look at that. The chocolate got all over my fingers."
Jim could have sworn he saw Spock's eyes dilating even more as he took in his chocolate covered hand and he replied in a low tone that Jim was starting to love more and more, "That will not do. Allow me to assist you."
Spock lightly held Jim's wrist as he brought it up to his mouth, slowly reaching his tongue out to grab whatever was left of the chocolate between Jim's fingertips, chewing carefully as he savored the taste, and he added, "It has a satisfactory flavor, but I am certain that I would be able to find something that tastes far better."
At that, Spock gave Jim an obvious once over, and unable to help himself, he shivered lightly and moaned in response. He definitely would be giving Spock chocolate more often if it made him like this. Spock then brought Jim's hand back toward his mouth and he ran his tongue slowly over every finger, licking thoroughly and insistently to get every bit of chocolate off of them.
By the time Spock was finished with Jim's fingers, there was quite an obvious tent in his pants. Something about watching the usually so prim and proper Vulcan being so unashamedly wanton got him off like nothing else. When Spock finally let his hand go, Jim was sure the lust in the other's eyes matched his own and he didn't waste another second in pulling the other against him and kissing him deep.
He could still taste all the chocolate, but it was mixed with another taste that was distinctly Spock. This aroused him even more, and he wasn't sure how long he'd be lasting in this encounter between them. He figured it didn't matter since there was no way he'd slow this down for anything.
Spock was surprisingly enthusiastic in their kiss, and his hands moved in a greedy way over his body, but Jim loved it. He began to push Spock's shirts up, wanting to get his hands on that skin, but before he knew what was happening, he was picked up and tossed on his bed as though he weighed the same as a feather. He looked at Spock in shock, but the other's burning gaze made him shiver and moan again.
"I find you to be as intoxicating as chocolate, Jim." Spock admitted plainly, joining him on the bed, straddling him, and then proceeded to kiss him senseless.
Jim decided he had to be losing his mind. He couldn't believe any of this was happening. As they kissed, they both struggled to get their clothes off, Spock due to his inebriation and Jim because Spock refused to get off of him as they kept going, but he couldn't care less.
When there was finally nothing between them, Jim could feel Spock's arousal lightly rubbing against his, and that was setting all of his nerves on end and he shuddered and moaned, "Oh, Spock...please..."
He wasn't quite sure what he was begging for, but Spock seemed to understand as he reached down between them to take Jim in hand and he rubbed the pre-come that had begun to leak out all over the head and he answered, "Yes, Jim..."
By now, Jim was speechless, and his back arched in the attempt to get more out of Spock's hand and he groaned when Spock prevented that. He instead leaned down to kiss his way up Jim's neck to his ear, whispering hotly, "I wish to take you. Would that be acceptable?"
Jim just shuddered and moaned as he heard that, the ridiculousness of Spock asking him that way with the way he was holding him down, and he rasped back, "Do it."
His hand shot out toward the nearby bedside table and he blindly shuffled through what was there until it came into contact with what he was looking for. He pushed the tube of lubrication at Spock, and smirked slightly at the other's eyebrow, saying, "What? I like being prepared."
Spock's lips then turned upward in a way Jim was sure would lead to an immediate hard on even if he saw it out of the bedroom, and he popped open the tube and began to prepare himself. If Jim thought Spock licking the chocolate off of his fingers was hot, watching him do this nearly did him in right then and there, and finally he shuddered and begged again, "Oh, god, I can't wait any more, please…"
At this, Spock gave him an intense look, and all of a sudden, Jim felt pressure against his entrance. He closed his eyes and groaned as he felt Spock slowly beginning to push into him, realizing that he'd forgotten just how it felt to be with someone like this, since it had been a rather long time since he'd last gotten with someone.
When Spock was fully inside of him, he took himself in hand and said, "Don't hold back."
Spock responded by giving him a hard thrust and he moaned as they started a rough rhythm between them. As they kept going, Jim was certain that he wouldn't be lasting all that long at all, feeling himself closing in to his orgasm at a frightening rate. But, honestly, he couldn't bring himself to care much about that, just stroking himself faster and returning all of Spock's thrusts with equal force.
Finally he couldn't take it any more, whispering Spock's name as he came all over their chests and stomach, not sure he'd ever come that hard in his life. Spock carefully pulled out of him as he panted in the effort of catching his breath. As messy as they both were, thanks to him, he gave Spock a half smile and pulled him to lay next to him.
It wasn't often that he wanted to cuddle after sex, but he felt like this was an important exception. He was half way sure this was some weird dream he was having, since it was Spock that had actually done all the propositioning and seducing. What kind of weird alternate universe was he in now? Well, no matter. He definitely would enjoy this as long as it would last.
He hoped that Spock wouldn't suddenly want to pretend this never happened the next day, but honestly, he would take whatever he could get from the Vulcan, as he was so extremely hard to approach in the past. As much as it shocked him that he actually wanted more out of this, if a few chocolate induced one night stands was all he was going to get for a while, he would definitely go with it.
He pulled Spock to sprawl across his chest, and the other made no comment on their messy state as would usually be expected. Jim was sure that was since the other was still a little drunk. He let out a small sigh and decided to worry about the aftermath of all this the next morning. He just nuzzled his head into the other's warm neck and let himself fall asleep.
Kirk stretched slowly and opened his eyes the next morning, feeling the most well rested he had in a long while, and he blinked in shock when he realized that he was alone in the bed.
For a split second he felt a flash of disappointment, but as he sat up, he noticed Spock fully dressed and watching him in a way he interpreted to be warily from a corner of the room, and he softly said, "Good morning, Captain."
And then everything started feeling awkward really fast, since what does a captain say after having an unexpected one night stand with their normally very uptight first officer? He was sure some of his uneasiness was coming from the fact that he didn't want it just to be a one night stand, and he was pretty certain that Spock was already wishing he didn't have that eidetic memory of his.
"Umm, morning." he replied awkwardly, not sure how to approach this situation.
He figured that the two of them were in for quite the conversation, and that it most likely would be best if he was clothed for said conversation. With the tension high in the room as he gathered his uniform parts to put back on, he then took in a difficult breath, wondering how to start as he approached Spock.
Spock finally spoke first, "I must apologize for the events of the previous evening. Be assured that they will never happen again."
Kirk then let out a sigh as Spock reacted exactly in the way he expected, though he had hoped that he wouldn't. He knew then that he had to lay what he felt out to let Spock know that his advance was definitely appreciated.
With a small and sheepish smile then coming to his lips, Kirk replied, "Who said that I wouldn't want it to happen again?"
His response seemed to give Spock pause as the other just looked at him critically for a long moment as though he was trying to crack a particularly puzzling code, his head turning to the side slightly in his curiosity.
"But, my understanding of human behavior led me to believe that what transpired between us both was what you might call a 'hook up.' A sexual interaction with no expectation of further involvement of emotions or repetition of said act."
Kirk then let out a discontented sigh, realizing that his reputation for being a promiscuous player had preceded him once again, finding that his First Officer even thought him capable of something like that with him. Sure, he was capable of that with people he didn't know, but with Spock, it always had been different. Though, he wouldn't let Spock derail him from finding out the truth.
It was Spock that hit on him first, and Spock that pursued until he agreed. Well, it didn't take him all that long to agree with how he'd wanted Spock for a while, and really, Spock had told him that he'd felt the same. Kirk knew then that he had to convince Spock that his feelings were real, that this wasn't just a game to him like many of his other one night stands were. He had to try for more. Spock deserved it, and he would give him that if the other would have him.
"Spock…last night, before everything, you told me that you'd wanted me too for a long time. Don't tell me that you just told me that to hook up with me." Kirk decided the best way to tackle this situation would be to convince Spock that he shared the same feelings as him, and hopefully then make what he would say more believable then.
It seemed as though the Vulcan bristled at that observation, and he replied stiffly, "Vulcans do not initiate casual sexual encounters, Captain."
In reply, Kirk just gave Spock a wry smile, "And though I'm far more likely to initiate a casual sexual encounter, you have to admit that this situation is far different than my usual MO. I usually choose people I meet during shore leave or other breaks from work, and I never choose anyone that I work with. And Spock, we're friends. I never usually bother really getting to know the people I hook up with before the act."
It really was strange analyzing his pick up technique so logically and critically, but he knew that it was the only way to make it make sense to Spock. The other was silent for a long moment as he digested what he told him. Finally, and rather reluctantly it seemed, Spock spoke again, "Your analysis appears to be correct, Captain."
Kirk grinned, glad to be making progress, shaking his head slightly, "And what is with this 'Captain' stuff? Especially with what has happened, we really should be on a first name basis, don't you think?"
Relenting slightly, Spock responded, "Jim, I do not believe it would be wise of us to continue this association, given our stations on the ship. A breakdown in the command structure due to a personal disagreement stemming from this association would be quite detrimental to ship function."
Of course Spock would be more concerned about work than any personal feeling, but Kirk could tell that he was getting through to the other with the unsure look that was in the Vulcan's eyes. If the sense he got from the brief mind meld he'd gotten from Spock Prime had told him anything, it was just how great a relationship with Spock could be.
Kirk didn't believe it at the time, feeling that his Spock and that Spock were far too different for it to be true, but in putting a bit of effort in getting to know the other let him know that it was true even in their universe. They had the potential to be great. And being one that rewrote the odds when they didn't appear to be in his favor, he knew that he definitely couldn't give up here.
What he also knew was that he had to prove to Spock that he meant every word of this, so he paused for a long moment before he softly said, "Spock…I want to tell you something."
At him changing the conversation direction suddenly, Spock raised an eyebrow at him, but still chose to humor him, "And what is that?"
Kirk felt his cheeks getting redder, never putting himself in such emotional situations usually, but he knew this called for it. He took a deep breath and continued, "When…I met you, well, the other you that is, I had melded with him. He wanted to explain why he was here with us quickly, and thought that the best way."
Spock's face was just about as even as always, except for his eyes, that had widened slightly. An unmistakable expression of his shock. Kirk could tell that Spock was rattled by this, though he was sure not many other people would have caught the way the other's hands had clenched slightly or the way his frame stiffened.
"That is an extremely intimate gesture amongst Vulcans, performed only with the highest trust. It is extremely irregular to perform such a deed with a virtual stranger."
"I suppose that would be right, but…somehow, I felt as though I could trust him. Call it a gut feeling. But…in the meld…I think things he didn't intend on passing through to me came over too." Kirk then looked up at Spock and smiled slightly, getting embarrassed as he remembered the warmth and downright adoration he had felt through the meld with Spock Prime.
He wasn't that Spock's Kirk, and even then he'd gotten those feelings. If that didn't attest to how special the other Kirk was to that Spock, nothing would. Spock now looked slightly curious again as he asked, "To what are you referring?"
Kirk gulped. He abruptly now remembered just how bad he was at all of this romantic stuff he was, but he had to genuinely try for Spock. The other needed to see this side of him, as content as he was to hide it from most of the world. He reached a hesitant hand out to Spock and lightly took his hand. Both of Spock's eyebrows went up at that, but he said nothing, luckily giving him a chance to speak.
He pushed forward, knowing that the reward would be well worth all of this horrible vulnerability and nervousness that he hated going through in these situations.
"I could tell that he and his Jim were pretty close." Pretty close was an understatement to the strong emotions he felt, but he didn't want to dump too much on Spock at first, sure the other understood what he meant with the blush that had begun creeping up his cheeks as he spoke.
Spock appeared to have noticed the way his face had reddened, so he nodded along with his words to allow him to keep speaking. Taking one more breath, Kirk pushed on.
"And, well…I'll admit. At first, I believed that it wouldn't be possible for us, not in the same way, anyway. I felt like we were too different from them." Kirk then smiled in a way that was far more vulnerable than was usual for him, and his voice softened, "But…I think I've changed my mind."
Spock's eyebrows slowly rose, and Kirk could see the other's cheeks had now become greener with a blush to join his own, and he gained a bit more confidence. Maybe this wasn't as one sided a thing as Spock wanted to make it. This caused him to push forward.
"Now that both of us were able to get over that initial misunderstanding, I feel like we're more similar than I ever wanted to believe before. I've seen the real you, and that's been enough for me to dispel that preconception of you I knew before," A small grin came to his lips at that, "I hope that the same is true of me for you."
Spock's cheeks got greener at that, but he softly replied, "Undoubtedly."
Kirk knew that if this wasn't a sign to keep going, nothing was, so he went with his gut, as he often did, and reached out to softly take one of Spock's hands in his own. He gripped lightly and let out a soft breath at the pleasant shiver the movement gave him. This just felt right, and there were just far too many emotions running through him for this to be anything resembling a hook up. No, he could honestly say that the time spent with Spock was far more important to him than anything physical, and this was something he never could say about anyone he was ever involved with.
Spock was just able to touch him on a far deeper level than anyone he'd ever been with in the past, and this is why Kirk didn't want to let this go. Especially before they'd given it a chance. He wouldn't allow Spock to throw it away before they tried. The Vulcan's hand trembled within his soft grip and for once, he seemed to be at a loss for words. Kirk didn't rush him, letting the other think this over.
Finally, he spoke, "You believe that a serious relationship between us can be carried out without detriment to our command?"
Kirk grinned at that and replied, "Of course I do. Even with this, I would have no problem telling you that I disagree with you, as I'm sure you'll still voice critiques of some of my command decisions. Our private life is our private life, and it won't destroy anything we have professionally."
He wanted to assure Spock that in spite of his occasional reckless and/or childish behavior, he understood that his First had a good point. What good would it do the Enterprise if her commanding officers were at each other's throats out of spite? But, Kirk knew that never would happen. They understood each other too deeply, and he wanted that in a partner. Kirk never thought it possible before, but now he was certain that he could have it.
He was certain that if he were to tie himself to one person, this person was it. Again, Spock was silent as he mulled it over, but he finally reached his free hand up to lightly touch Kirk's cheek, and he softly said, "Jim…oh, how long I have told myself it could not be possible between us, how long I convinced myself that you never would be interested in such a relationship…if you have faith in what we can have, I will give myself to you fully."
Kirk couldn't help but give Spock a bright grin then, knowing that was as close to a human confession of love he'd get out of Spock, at least for the time being, and it made him feel warm inside.
Raising a teasing but affectionate eyebrow at Spock then, "Since we still have several hours until beta shift, I wouldn't mind giving myself to you fully either."
Spock's lips turned up in the smallest hint of a smirk, "If that is what you wish, Ashayam."
Kirk chuckled at that and pulled Spock back toward the bed, "You have got to teach me more Vulcan."
Kirk didn't give Spock much of a chance to reply as both pairs of their lips were quickly engaged in activity that had very little to do with coherent speech.