Disclaimer: Um, this is someone's diary, so no, I'm pretty sure I don't own it. Enjoy, but don't tell her I found it! Any pages that were before or after the dates recorded here were either lost or cut for irrelevancy.

Sept. 27, 2005

There's a new janitor at school. Normally, I wouldn't care about who does the cleaning, but this is different. First of all, he's fine. Second of all, he can dance. I saw him in the parking lot after classes, and he knows I did. It almost looked like he was showing off for me after I noticed him, like he didn't even care that I was watching. Almost like he wanted me to watch. But here's the clincher: besides the fact that Brett would kill me if I so much as think about it, he's not actually the janitor. He's the arrogant toad who trashed the theater, and he's doing the work as community service. The worst part about it, he obviously has no remorse for the damage he caused. He just exudes his arrogance. And yet—there's something about him. He said "hi" to me at practice, but I think Brett showing up sent a pretty clear message. At least, I hope it did. I only wish that him looking at me didn't turn my stomach into a butterfly house.

ANYWAY! Enough about this guy. There are only two more months until the fall showcase, and I can't let any distractions get in my way! All that matters now is practice, practice, practice. Mom is still heckling me about being gone too much, but she doesn't understand! This showcase is what I need to get a job through a dance company. Therefore, it is my most important focus right now. Dad would understand—I know he would.

Well, I guess I should go to bed now. No sense in staying up too late. Being tired and cranky is the last thing I need to do my best in practice.

Sept. 29, 2005

Crazy tired. Dancing is taking up every ounce of energy. And Mom is being more insufferable than ever. When will she realize that dancing is everything to me? This exhibition is so important. If I don't do well on it, I'll never be able to get a job doing what I love. The last thing I want is to go to college and get stuck in some junky job. At any rate, gotta crash. Big day tomorrow.

Sept. 30, 2005

You are not going to believe my terrible luck! Andrew came in today before practice on a set of crutches. Apparently, he landed on his ankle wrong and sprained it, and now he's out for the dance! What am I going to do for a partner?! I guess I could audition some of the lowerclassmen to do it, but… Not particularly keen on the idea. I mean, they're lowerclassmen. Do they have the talent or skill to do what it takes for a senior showcase? Unlikely.

But I am not going to be put out for this. Oh, man! I'm late for my children's dance class! Gotta run!

Oct. 3, 2005

So… I auditioned some of the sophomore dancers to see if any of them was capable to be my partner. Epic fail. They're either not strong enough, or not confident enough, or not skilled enough, or not whatever enough. But you won't believe who showed up at practice again today! Yeah, that new cleaning guy. His name is Tyler, by the way. And it took him the entire half hour while I was doing auditions to clean the windows in the dance room.

But I'm still shocked about what happened next. After the last guy had left, he walked over to me and said simply, "I'll do it." Sorry, but I looked at him like he'd gone nuts. He was offering to be my dance partner! At first, I basically told him to buzz off—but then, something I still don't understand made me change my mind. And I told him to catch me. I ran at him, without almost any warning. And he caught me. No effort at all. My heart is still racing wildly. What is it about this guy that does this to me? Not even Brett can make my heart beat like this. Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa. I can NOT be doing this! No! I am NOT, I repeat NOT interested in Tyler! He's all bad news. Good thing there's no chance of Brett seeing this, though. He would be ticked…

Okay, well, anyway, Tyler is going to be my new partner. At least, until Andrew gets back on his feet. Tyler is just going to help make sure I don't get off track. It helps him, too, since it will count toward his community service. My first practice with him starts tomorrow—we'll see how it goes.

Oct. 6, 2005

It has been barely two days with this punk as my partner, and he is driving me INSANE! He's late half the time, and when he does show up, he's wearing these baggy clothes he can barely move in! It's hard to dance when you're always needing to pull your pant leg out of the way. I finally had to buy him a pair of sweatpants. Hopefully they help.

But on top of all that, he is constantly wanting to do his own thing! He has this style of dancing that looks more like it belongs in a club than on a stage—and it probably does. The concept he has of ballet is basic, and working with him is like trying to break a mustang! Not like I've done a lot of that in my life, but I can imagine that it would be a lot like this. It should not be this frustrating, right? I can't wait until Andrew gets back. Then I won't have to deal with any of this.

To make matters worse (if that can be possible), Lucy is continually glancing at me and giving me that little grin of hers. She thinks that Tyler and I would make a good couple, apparently. I told her that she's wrong, and there is nothing between us. She doesn't believe me. Besides, there's still Brett, though he's become almost unbearable since this whole business with Tyler started. They nearly got into it after practice the first day, and they're at each other's throats practically every time they see each other now. Unfortunately, most of this seems to be my fault… Why does high school have to be so complicated, anyway?

Oct. 17, 2005

I am so happy right now, I don't even know what to do with myself. I shouldn't be this happy. Really, I shouldn't. But I finally found someone to work with for the canon dance that I've been wanting to do! You guessed it—it's Tyler. We did the most amazing dance down at the docks. Everything flowed so well together, and he was just…there to catch and lift me. It was perfect; everything I've ever wanted in a dance.

Okay, I need to calm down. My boyfriend is coming over at any minute, and I can't be in this euphoric state when he gets here…

Oct. 20, 2005

Brett is a jerk! A complete jerk! Why would he not tell me that he'd gone to New York City to get signed on a contract? I can't believe he would do this to me! Finding out through the school grapevine is the worst way to find something out that your boyfriend should have told you a week ago. And not only that, he dumped Miles in the midst of it! Just left him by the wayside while my idiot of an ex-boyfriend—yes, that's right—walked all over him to get his way! Miles was crushed to learn that Brett had been signed without him.

I admit that my temper might have got the better of me, but Brett and I are finished now, and I don't regret dumping him one bit. He thought I was dumping him because of Tyler, but he couldn't be more wrong. Tyler is nice, sure. Good-looking, yes. Charming, most definitely. But he has a MAJOR commitment problem. He can barely come to class, and has already quit on me once.

It was funny how he made that up to me, though. He said he'd do anything…so I made him take ballet with my toddler class. And apparently he was being too loud, so little Mary, who was on the barre in front of him, kept shushing him. We couldn't help but laugh over it, both at the time and later, when he walked me home.

Maybe I am falling for this guy. I don't know.

Oct. 21, 2005

So… I went to the club tonight to see Lucy sing, and…Tyler was at the club, too. He came with Miles. Of course, we danced, with him learning our group dance and naturally taking the floor with his sweet moves. On top of that, Miles was able to do the soundboard on stage! He really killed it—and seems to be more confident showing his skill to other people. Plus, there might be chance that he and Lucy could get together! You know, she sets me up with Tyler, I set her up with Miles—it's a best friend thing. And, if you ask me, Miles is waaay better than that Colin guy she's been dating.

But, the most wonderful part of the evening wasn't any of that! Tyler kissed me! And, truth be told, I kissed him right back. He—I don't know. He's exciting and mysterious and talented and it seems like he's everything I've ever been looking for! I don't think I've been this happy in a looong time! Oops. I just squealed out loud! Good thing Mom's already in bed!

Wow. Um, I should probably get to bed now. It's almost three in the morning.

Oct. 26, 2005

Going out with Tyler is the absolute amazingest thing ever. That is all.

Oct. 28, 2005

All I can say right now is I'm glad this isn't a paper diary. It would be illegible with how much I've been crying today. I should have known that all good things come to an end! I should have known that Tyler and I would never last.

Today was just awful. First of all, halfway through practice, this African American guy walks in the studio, sees us dancing, and is disgusted by it! Tyler seemed to know him, and chased after him for whatever reason. To explain something, I guess. But Tyler being gone just those few moments was when Andrew felt he needed to make his move. Apparently, his ankle is feeling better, and he's ready to rejoin the group as my partner again. It's a good thing he's been watching us practice, but most of this dance was Tyler's idea! Doing it without him…

Well, Tyler came back in, and saw Andrew and I talking. He drew his own conclusions, thought I was going to kick him out, and we had this fight… Like I said, it was awful. He compared me to Brett of all people, telling me I had used him just like Brett had used Miles! I told him it wasn't like that, that I just needed a moment to figure it out, but he left. He's done. Done with the dance, and done with me. I think I need to go get some chocolate ice cream. All of this stress is making my head hurt.

Nov. 1, 2005

Andrew is nothing like Tyler. He can't get the moves at all. I really miss that "loser," as Brett called him. And I wish he'd take my calls.

Nov. 3, 2005

Well. Um, where to start… Do you want the good news or the bad news? I guess I'll start with the good news. Mom and I had this great talk tonight. It was like she finally actually understood what dancing meant to me and how important it was! We haven't bonded like that in a long time, and it was so amazing.

But the bad news is pretty bad. Andrew quit on me yesterday. He was trying to do one of the steps, and fell on his ankle again. It obviously wasn't healed as much as he'd hoped it was, and now he's out. For the second time. And the showcase is barely a week away!

That was one of the best parts of our conversation tonight, though. Mom heard me out and encouraged me. She even suggested that I do the dance without a partner! I told her it was too late, but she believes in me! If she thinks I can do it, well, then I might as well try.

Nov. 12, 2005

Oh. My. Goodness. Could things get better? Could they get any better? I don't think so. I must be at that point where things are so good they can't improve any more. Right? Oh, I hope not!

Okay, let me start with the most mundane part of my evening: tonight was the showcase. Enough said, right? Not hardly. Because this was the BEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE! It was the most incredible experience. You would not even begin to believe it! First of all, I told you that Tyler ditched me and Andrew got hurt again. Well, I've been practicing solo for the past week or so. And tonight finally came—then Tyler showed up again, five minutes before we were supposed to be on stage! He apologized, told me he was there because he wanted me to be able to do the dance the way I'd always imagined it. Said he was fighting for something that was real for the first time in his life. But Director Gordon was backstage, too, and she and I both told him that it was too late.

Yet— Again, I don't know why, but I changed my mind. And I am SO glad I did! We did the dance with Tyler, the way we'd been practicing and the way we'd wanted to. It was the most amazing thing ever!

As if things couldn't get any better, I found out afterwards I'm going to be signed with one of the major dance companies in Maryland! And, wait for it… Tyler is a transfer student now at MSA! I know, right? Who would have thought that this much could happen in one day? Now I am sure that I could not be happier. This has been the most fabulous day ever!

And when he picked me up and spun me around after the dance, I finally realized the best thing.

I think I'm in love with Tyler Gage.

So, this is the first product of my love for the movie Step Up. I hope you'll let me know your thoughts!