Dislcaimer: Legolas belongs to JRR Tolkien, also the setting (in middle earth, and the orcs, and elves, etc...) Anmai, and Hoshi are characters of my invention.
The looked that passed between them, could have lasted forever, but it didn't. It was a look that showed much sorrow and regret, in both pairs eyes. The two who shared the look were completely different themselves. One being from the race of men, a female, and one being from the race of elves, a male.
Two people who shared no past and no future except from what that shared looked had ensnared them into. Two strangers, who had no wishes to meet another. The differences between them were far more than just physical.
That look though had been trouble, right from the beginning, I thought, lying awake on my back, staring up at the stars in the sky. I had been dying inside from the pain, the loneliness, and from the torture of my past. My past...... it was something I could never help but think about. My life had been hell, and now hell was in me, making me relive my past over and over again inside.
Unwanted memories flooded back........ again.
"Anmai, I have to go!" I screamed.
"You cannot help him now, child" replied Anmai, "Even if you could it is too late I fear."
"I have to try, Anmai. He's my brother."
"He is also my brother, but his life, will be no longer lived. It was his time, and soon it will be ours." Anmai stared out the window at the leaves, falling.
"You can always try to change that future. Anmai, look at me," Anmai looked back at me, "What is done is done, I realise that there is no more we can do to help him. I do not blame you, it was never your fault. But, Anmai we can escape even without him, we can do it, he would have wanted us to."
"There is much you do not understand, about what our situation is now, and I wonder if you'll ever fully understand," Anmai said almost wistfully, staring at nothing. "Time will pass us by, and there are some things, we will never solve. Why did this happen to us?"
"Anmai, please. Help me escape." Anmai gave her a long sad, but hopeful look, "please Anmai."
She had agreed of course, and she must have known of what was to happen. She only helped me because I wanted her help. She knew life could have been worse, and in ways it was now. She knew that she would die helping me fly to freedom. I am alive, and free. Though my soul feels like an old cobweb, that could be swept away by the slightest wind. I now know more of this world of mine. More of what men are like. Sometimes, just sometimes I wish she had not agreed.
And then I remember my meeting the elf. The looked we exchanged has changed my life. It ensnared us together. My existence in his life though would be short and almost forgettable. Our paths had crossed again. A month later.
"Excuse me sir," I asked the hooded man in front of me. "I am in need of directions." Even though I could not see his eyes, I felt his gaze pierce my soul.
"Directions to where, child" I bristled at the name he gave me. 'Child', no one had called me that since Anmai, four long years ago. Some wounds never heal.
"Directions to the nearest city, sir." The sir was added with just a hint of sarcasm, just a hint.
"Maybe, if you follow the road, you will come to a city." His reply, and with it a hint of mockery. The man was arrogant. I hated asking strangers questions like this on the road. Absolutely hated it. Although it does have its advantages, I thought, For example if he pisses me off anymore, there was none around to see me strangle him. I smiled inside innocently, even though I knew my bark was much worse than my bite.
"Well, sir." I reply honeying my voice to convey my sarcasm more deeply, "If you haven't noticed there are two roads." I point to a fork in the road.
"Well so there is." He sounded a little shocked at this discovery of mine. Time for my barb to go in deeper. Just because he annoyed me.
"For one who seems to be so alert in his surroundings, one must surely have known where the road one travels was going." I added a sickly sweet smile. "This one must be so complete with one's surrounding that one does not need to know where one is going." With that I took a chance and decided to go on the right fork. But no sooner had I started again on my travel, but the man was at my side.
"It is dangerous to travel alone," he said.
"In my time. It has always been dangerous to travel, even not alone." I replied, memories.
We rode together, silently for a while. I wished he hadn't joined me, he was a stranger. But, I enjoyed the company, something I had not had for a long time, and I knew that I would regret him leaving. Now, when I looked over at him I could see his eyes, though his hood had not been pulled up. I finally decided to break the silence.
"What is your name." I asked him. He hesitated, I almost thought he wouldn't give it to me. Then I knew I wouldn't be able to trust him.
"Legolas," he replied finally. Elven, it should have surprised me, but it didn't.
"When did you give up the company of your fellow elves, for humans?" I asked him.
"I didn't give it up. I just like to.... wander sometimes." I accepted his words. At least he didn't ask me why I shun my fellow humans. "Anyways, my fair rider," I laughed at that, "May I ask, what is your name."
"'Fair Rider', that is something I have never been called. I do give you permission to call me it again, though. Unfortunately for you, I do not give my name so freely." He gave me a questioning glance. "Names are powerful. They are complete mysteries upon themselves. They are a key to one's self. A key that can been used against one."
"I believe, names are a beautiful thing," he replied.
"Beautiful, until used against you." Memories, Anmai.
We had a fair exchange though. He never showed me his face, and I never revealed my name. He called me 'Fair Rider'. While I was left to wonder what his face could be like.
That had been the first day in our travels together. We were wandering as he had rightly named it. Going on trails and through the country. Marvelling in its beauty. We had not encountered any creatures who wished to hurt us. Though, there were creatures like that in this area. I had been attacked before, when I was alone. But it was good to know, that now I had someone to help me fight my battles, no matter how short a time he stayed with me.
Elves should never associate with men. They bring pain to both lives. To the Elves, the pain is strong, but for them it only lasts for a glimpse, even if the actual amount of time is as long as the man's. The man's pain though is always worse, no matter how much the elf feels. The pain is excruciating, but it can fade over time, not much though. The pain for men will last for the rest of their life.
Those had been the words of Anmai. And with them on my mind, I fell into a troubled asleep.
In the morning, when I woke. I lay for a few minutes on my back, staring at the sky. I did not wish to rise. There was something about this day, that made me want to crawl under my cloak and hide. Legolas was already up. The breakfast was already prepared for me. He had obviously eaten. I must have slept in far too long. For he always waited for me to wake before eating.
Silently I ate, thinking upon my thoughts from the night before. Anmai had never been wrong, and I had many years left, if I wasn't killed in a foolish battle, before it was my time to die. The elf should leave soon. Before I started depending on him. Before he started to help heal the wound of my family which was gone from my reach forever.
The elf returned from wherever he had gone to. I being in deep thought, had not realised that he had even left.
"There is something near that is evil," he told me. Confirming my feelings earlier that morning.
"There is evil in many places." I informed him, At least, I know of evil in many places. But I promptly got up, and started to get our small camp packed up.
We were finished packing, and just about to leave. When Legolas stopped me. Something was coming. Something that we now could not escape from. And then they were upon us. He was ready with his bow and arrow, and I with my trusty sword, that had helped me out of so many messes. They, the enemy, were orcs and there were plenty. We both fought, with all our strength. But the orcs kept on coming, and coming, as if they were being chased by something. We saved each other's skins many times, in the first stages of our defence.
Then, something happened. I realised that the orcs were, in reality, being chased by something. But this something had surrounded them, and now, the orcs that had passed us by before in their flight, were now coming back, towards us. This I thought furiously as my sword took on an oncoming enemy, is not how I wanted to die. I did not want to die like some hero saving an elf from some orcs. It was a foolish thought, but it helped. It made anger grow in me, and with this anger I attacked with a new energy.
I now could just barely see the thing that had been chasing the orcs. Many men, on horseback. and some with arrows. Oh great. this was just the perfect mess, orcs being surrounded by men, with arrows, and us in the centre. Knowing my luck, I was going to get skewered by a stray arrow.
Then I felt it. Pain. Physical pain. I had felt emotional pain, many times over the years. But never Physical pain, at least not like this. I turned to the source. A great orc standing there. Huge strong orc. Lifting his axe, ready to chop me down. I blinked and he wasn't there anymore. Well that wasn't totally true. He was there. Lying on the ground with an elven arrow through his heart.
I spared a glance at my wandering partner, to thank him. But, I saw that he was in even bigger trouble. He was surrounded by orcs. He would have had a tough time with the ones in front alone. But behind him, were the ones that were really going to be a trouble. I advanced. I had the advantage of surprise. But, unexpectedly not of speed. My wound that I had received from the huge orc slowed me down. There were only two left, now in front of me. They attacked simultaneously.
The next thing I knew was that I was lying on the ground. When gentle arms reached down to cradle me.
"My fair rider." Legolas' voice called out after me. I could now see him, but it seemed that my body was not my own. I could barely recover my own senses. I smiled grimly. So this was what that feeling this morning was warning me about. Then I realised, Anmai must have known she was to die, when she agreed to help me escape She had known that she was to die, either way.
"I do not have long," my voice was soft, and distant. I could see him frowning. "But before I go may, I ask of a favour?" It took so much effort to talk.
"Anything, fair rider." her replied, his voice was steady, but with eyes filled with pain.
"I wish to see your face." I asked him, almost pleading. "For all I've seen of it are your eyes." He slowly reached up and pulled back his hood. His face was more perfect than in all my dreams of it, and I knew that face. It was the face of the elf that had caught my eye with his, at least a month ago. He smile, though was sad, and grim. I give him a sad smile. "I don't know why you sometimes hide your face and not at other times, for it sure does make up for your lack of people skills." He gave me smile, with a hint of sadness, and annoyance.
"Then maybe now, I will finally know your name." he asked.
"You are a brother to me, Legolas. But my name was taken from me along time ago. Given to one who used it against me." I replied. But before the hurt that was now creeping in his eyes crept further, I spoke again. "I will give you a name to call me though. It is Hoshi, it means star, my brother used to call me it." My voice was growing softer and softer. He then held me against his chest, like a brother held a sister. And all the while calling me Hoshi. I now was going, where my brother and my sister had gone four years, ago. My elf brother though, I knew, would never join me there. And a tear leaked from the corner of my eye, just before I caught my last breath.