This is a short modern piece set in the USA, which is dedicated to women everywhere who have a hard time on Mother's Day.
Chapter One: Don't Think About Your Dead Mother; Focus On Your Children Instead
Georgiana Darcy Jones was busy shopping on the night before Mother's Day. She had to purchase all of her family's regular groceries and the ingredients for the dinner her husband would be making for her and her mother-in-law, along with picking out a card for her mother-in-law. Georgiana did not feel like shopping or doing anything. Mother's Day made her sad every year when she thought about her own mother. She knew her husband would have done all the shopping had she asked, but Georgiana thought she did a better job shopping in general than her husband.
Georgiana never knew what to ask for when her children asked what to buy her. Typically she named whatever she thought was easiest for them to get that would not cost too much. If she could have, she would have just ignored the whole day. Her children had gotten used to seeing her cry on Mother's Day, though she did her best not to cry as she did not want to ruin their efforts. Somehow in the middle of the drive to the grocery store, even though it wasn't Mother's Day yet, Georgiana found herself crying. She would give anything to still have her mother with her, but it just wasn't possible. F***ing cancer! She spent a few minutes crying in the parking lot, but after blowing her nose a few times managed to get herself calmed down.
It wasn't so bad when she was in the produce department and picking out different kinds of apples. It wasn't so bad when she was in the seafood department and comparing the prices of the lobster tails her older son really wanted (too expensive), with the crab legs. It wasn't so bad when she was selecting her younger son's cereals. She really didn't mind seeing the other families pushing around their children in grocery carts. It did not particularly make her think of her mom, as she was too old to sit in the cart when her mom passed. However, seeing baby girls always brought a bit of longing to her as though she loved her two boys she had always wanted a daughter but her husband had long ago declared them done.
What undid her in the grocery story was when she passed children clutching flowers, balloons and talking excitedly about what else to get their moms. Georgiana wanted to be one of those happy, smiling children again, to have the simple joy of giving her mother something. She recalled a clay angel she had made for her mother one year in school. The angel was lopsided, disproportional and a rather pitiful and ugly effort, but her mother had rewarded Georgiana with a large smile, a big hug, and had placed the angel in a place of honor in the bookcase in her office.
Georgiana pulled herself together enough and resumed her shopping. The healthcare aisles were safe enough. Razors, pads, toothpaste, Chapstick. But then it was time to find a card for her mother-in-law. Georgiana found herself in front of one of the square displays of cards. She wanted to find a funny card but not an offensive one. She would not buy a card with a lot of false sentiments that did not reflect how Steve felt about his mom. She and her husband Steve had a difficult time with his mother. Sylvia was always interfering in their lives and telling them how to raise their sons. This would not be nearly so annoying if not for the fact that Sylvia had been abusive to Steve and his brothers but conveniently forgot how each of them had moved out in the middle of high school. The stories Steve had told her were right out of a Lifetime movie about "Psycho Mom" in the lead up to when she went completely nuts. Of course Sylvia had never gone completely nuts and was a bit better on the modern medications.
Georgiana tried to be patient with Sylvia, but it was difficult. On Georgiana's wedding day, for all of Georgiana's joy in marrying the man she loved, she missed having her mom with her. Every milestone she experienced, she always had in the back of her head how it might be different if her mother was there. She had even cried in the church's dressing room when her aunt was helping her get into her gown.
Aunt Fitzwilliam had hugged her and said, "Now dear, what is this all about? You know if you have any doubts you don't have to go through with it. That's what I told my daughters when they got married and I'm sure your mother would have told you the same thing."
"Would she have, do you think?" Georgiana asked, trying to picture whether her mother would have in fact given her that advice. Of course she knew that if her mother had been there she would not have been crying right then. "Oh, aunt, I do not have any doubts about Steve, I am just missing my mother. You have been wonderful, but I wish she were here."
"I wish she were, too, my dear. She did not want to leave you or William, or your father, but you know that in the end it was a mercy. She would be proud of the woman you have become. Now see if you can dry your tears, today is supposed to be a happy day."
Georgiana met Fitzwilliam outside the dressing room. He told her, "Oh Georgiana, you look so beautiful. Steve is a lucky guy. Just don't forget that you love your brother a little too."
"I won't," she reassured him. As if anyone could replace Fitzwilliam. "Is everyone in there?"
"Yes, Aunt De Bourgh is in high form today, but Richard and Anne promise they will keep her from embarrassing you."
Just then Georgiana heard the strains of the adagio she was going to walk down the aisle to. Lizzy was playing it, just as they had arranged, though of course Lizzy had told her, "I know you can't play the piano at your own wedding, but I am not going to sound nearly as good as you would."
"Are you ready?" Her brother asked.
"Yes, Brother." She gave Fitzwilliam her brightest smile and tried to focus on the fact that she was finally getting married. It was all real. All her dreams were coming true. By the time Fitzwilliam walked her down the aisle, she was nothing but smiles.
Georgiana had managed to pull herself together and focus on Steve during the ceremony, but a few times during the day her aunt noticed a little wistful expression on her niece's face and knew just what it was.
Most of the guests were finished eating and Steve and Georgiana were separately circulating and talking with their guests when her new mother-in-law Sylvia came over to Georgiana. Sylvia did not wait for Georgiana to finish talking to her elderly great aunt before she grabbed at Georgiana, and when Georgiana turned told her, "What a wonderful day this has been. I am pleased that you finally got married, rather than continuing to live in sin."
Georgiana felt herself blush. Sylvia was very loud and it was embarrassing to have her business bandied about in front of everyone. In fact, Georgiana and Steve had only been sharing the same apartment for a couple of weeks as it did not seem to make sense to keep paying on two leases and it was easier to consolidate their lives before their wedding than to wait until after their honeymoon. But she did not want to make too big of a deal about her mother-in-law's comment and have Sylvia try to argue that she was right. Fortunately Georgiana saw her opportunity to make her escape as the wedding coordinator was signaling to her.
"If you will excuse me Sylvia, I need to find Steve so we can cut the cake."
"What's this 'Sylvia' business? Georgiana, you are my daughter now; you really ought to call me Mom."
Georgiana sweetly replied, "It is lucky I am not actually your daughter, or how could I have married Steve?"
"Very funny, dear, but still, I really want you to call me Mom." Sylvia had her hands on her hips and looked seriously put out. Georgiana who was by far too nice of a person, was tempted to just agree to head off a potential argument, but Steve had told her that she needed to stand up to Sylvia or she would be walked all over. Georgiana really wished Steve was there in this moment to support her.
"I will stick with Sylvia or Mrs. Jones if you don't mind."
"But I do, it isn't as if you have a mother anymore."
When Georgiana had heard those words, she felt the pain she had been holding at bay ripple across her chest. She felt tears well up and chanted to herself in her mind, "I will not cry; I will not cry."
Fortunately, Steve must have seen that something was wrong because he was instantly at Georgiana's side. "We've got to go, love, that cake won't cut itself. Let's make a deal; I won't shove cake into your face if you won't either." Steve smiled a silly little grin at Georgiana. As they had already agreed to a dignified eating of the cake, and Steve was a man of his word, Georgiana knew she had nothing to fear. She smiled back a little and a bit of the pressure on her chest lessened and she felt the tears travel from her eyes to her nose. She sniffed them up and with her head held high proceeded with the cake cutting.
After the cake cutting, she noticed her brother seemed to be having some quite words with her mother-in-law.
Later, at the fancy hotel room at which they were spending their wedding night before flying to the French countryside, Steve asked, "Do you want to talk about it? I know my mother did something."
Georgiana told him what Sylvia said.
"Oh, wow. That is terrible. I am sure you were missing your mother a lot today and my mom had to rub it in, salt in wounds and such. She was probably mad that the attention wasn't all on her today. I tell you, I could care less if you ever call her Mom. She really doesn't deserve to be called Mom by me, let alone you."
At the grocery store Georgiana kept looking at card after card. She would not buy a card for Sylvia which called her "best mother" "most wonderful mother" or talked about all she did and sacrificed. Georgiana wished her mother was still alive; any of these sorts of cards would have been apt for her own mother. For a moment Georgiana toyed with buying one of those cards and placing it on her mother's grave. It wasn't really practical as her mother's grave was on the other side of the country.
Finally Georgiana found a card with a cute pug that resembled Sylvia's pug which was generic enough about mothers in general that she felt might do. She dreaded having to have Sylvia over for hours on the following day.
On the drive home Georgiana cried a bit more. When she arrived in the garage she was surprised to see the door into the house ajar. Her husband and sons were waiting for her to unload the groceries. Her older son saw her wet eyes and immediately gave her a hug. "It is okay, Mom. Are you thinking about Grandma?"
"Yes, I am," Georgiana admitted.
"I miss Grandma, too," he said sweetly.
"But you never knew her."
"It doesn't matter, Mom, you've told me all about her and I know I would have liked her."
One more time Georgiana's tears dried. She let herself get caught up in the hustle and bustle of getting groceries put away and hearing of what her sons had been up to while she was gone. That night when she went to bed, she resolved that tomorrow would be a good day if she had anything to say about it. She deserved it and her sons deserved it, too.