Story: Hope of Morning, Chapter 1
Summary: "He may seem cold-blooded, but he's more human, and his heart more brittle, than anybody else, so much so that, if you filled it with human love or betrayal, it would break easily, which is why, I think, he chose, from the start, to avoid it all, to love humanity, you understand? Not to accept, not to face it. To avoid it."
Izaya was constantly gadding people to just commit suicide, but one day Shinra receives a call. Izaya had tried to off himself. Was it karma, or something different?
Warnings for entire story: A suicide attempt, some talk of physical and psychological abuse, language(...?), talk and acts of smoking(Shizuo)[is that a warning? Oh well... =w=], and minor self-harm in the future, as well as an amnesic Izaya.
Shinra's Apartment
It was late, as the underground doctor, Kishitani Shinra, sat on the couch, absentmindedly watching a news station on a large black TV, all the while he was continuously and anxiously awaiting his headless lover's, Celty's, return.
"I wish Celty would come on hooome..." he whined, childishly rolling around on the cushions. That's when his phone suddenly began ringing on top of a nearby coffee table.
'I wonder who that could be. Must be another job or something...' he assumed nonchalantly, before getting up.
He was almost surprised when he saw that it was Namie, but he answered anyway. She usually wasn't up at two or three in the morning to make a phone call, unless it was about something really important, and-backslash-or something that was getting in her way. It had definitely perked his curiosity at least a bit, or he probably wouldn't have answered right now.
"Moshimoshi." Shinra said, turning on the speaker and down the TV.
"Kishitani-sensei, it's me." came Namie's voice from the other end of the phone line.
"Namie-san, you hardly ever call me this late. So, to say the least, I'm actually a bit surprised. Did something happen?" Shinra inquired.
"Yes, it's..." The woman suddenly trailed off into silence. Even though he wasn't there personally, he could pretty much tell she was distracted by something.
"Namie-san?"
"Right, I must apologize for that. " she said after a moment, coughing a bit awkwardly, before he heard the door open behind him, knowing that Celty was back. He wanted to hug her right away, but forced himself to stay on the phone.
"As you should know by now, I'm not a person who particularly enjoys prolonging a conversation, beside of with my brother Seiji, so I'm just going to be quick and direct about this." she stated simply and as-a-matter-of-factly.
"Um, okay." Shinra gave a sort-of questioning tone, confused.
"Earlier, I happened to leave my coat at Izaya's apartment building, so I came back a short while ago to retrieve it. However, whenever I got there, there was a faint smell of blood coming from the bathroom, where I'd found him in a large pile of blood. Apparently, he'd attempted to slit his own throat with one of his switchblades. He's still breathing, though, but it's actually rather faint. I am currently cleaning up some of the blood, right now."
Shinra felt his stomach suddenly turn and his breath catch in his chest when what she'd just told him started to sink in. Izaya. Blood. His switchblade. Suicide. This had to be some sort of joke, right?
"Wait, Orihara-kun wouldn't... Na...Namie-san, what kind of job has he put you up this time? Have you... called an ambulance or something? Tell me; he's okay, right? What-"
"Kishitani-sensei," his chest dropped when he was suddenly cut off by Namie. "you are his friend, are you not? I wouldn't have even found him if I hadn't left my coat here, and I have no obligation to actually save that man. However, according to that Dullahan friends of yours, you're one of the only people who claims Orihara-san to be one of his friends. Personally, I think, if you say something such as that, you should at least try to live up to it if you really are as devoted to him as you say you are. It's up to you if you if want to abandon him, despite the fact you are one of the only 'friends' he says he has as well. To be honest, I really don't care one way or the other about him, much less what caused him to resort to this, as I've already paid him back for anything he'd say I owed him by bandaging some of his more serious injuries and cleaning up his blood. So I'm leaving the rest up to you. Do what you want, I guess. I'm hanging up now."
"Wait...!" Shinra exclaimed, but then dropped the phone when he realized she'd already hung up.
He jumped, slightly startled, when a message box on a certain PDA was shoved into his face.
[What happened?]
It was Celty. It'd kind of slipped his mind that she was even there, but he suddenly gave her a desperate look.
"Celty, would you be mind to taking me to Izaya's apartment over in Shinjuku...? Namie-san just called me. Something really bad happened, but I don't feel I can say anything for sure until I go there. He... I..."
He had to see it for himself; or he felt he'd never be able to forgive himself for not trying to help if something actually did happen to Izaya. Especially when...he'd noticed the oncoming signs and had tried to ignore them. Izaya had never willingly let anyone in on his own feelings unless they were persistent enough, and they were a true friend, but most people didn't like him and would just give up as soon as he was acting himself again. The truth was, nobody had really ever wanted to be around Izaya, nor had anybody wanted to involve him in anything with their friends, ever since he could remember.
He momentarily began to wonder if the crimson eyed man had forgotten how to be himself, much less ask for advice even from a 'friend'. He also began to feel guilty about the whole 'hot pot' incident(as well as a few other things), but quickly retracted to staying calm, because Izaya was in a lot worse shape than he was right now. He hoped that Namie would at least watch over him for a little while longer because, anything at all could happen at this point, he was sure.
Celty seemed to nod in understanding, as she typed a message and held it up to him.
[If it's really what you want, I'd be glad to. Is he hurt...? Do you want to talk about it?]
"Yes, no, well, it's, um..." he tried to find the words, but they wouldn't come. Celty then waved her hand slightly dismissively, but in a way to let him know that they would discuss it later, if he wanted.
[It's alright. You don't have to talk about it right now, if you don't want, Shinra. I'd...kind of rather find out for myself, as well...]
As he read the message, tears welled up in his eyes, before he gave her a small smile.
"You know... I don't know how many times I've said this, but I really am happy that you're here for me, Celty. I'd never be able to express it enough, but you really do mean so much to me, Celty." he hugged her briefly, before leaving the room to retrieve his first aid kit throwing it into a travel bag of which he quickly slipped on his back. They then left the apartment, making their way outside of the building, immediately using her shadows to form her 'motorcycle-horse'.
Getting on behind her after his helmet had been made, he wrapped his arms around her, preparing for her to take off.
[It's been a while since you've asked me to take you somewhere.]
She briefly held out her PDA for him to read, before he felt the world around him begin to speed by.
"It has, hasn't it...?" Shinra looked away, pulling closer. He momentarily rested his cheek on her upper back.
He just couldn't seem to ignore the feeling lurking deep in the pit of his stomach that this was going to be a stressful night for all of them, and worry for his friend-since-middle-school only increased. What had led to this he could only assume, but he had to find a way to help Izaya, no matter what. It was a promise, if not to one of his only friends, then at least to himself. He then wanted to do his best to make up for the hurt he may have unknowingly caused him.
Despite what Izaya had done, he was still his friend. Even if he didn't want to accept it, he was still human where it counted, and would always be liable to those terrible feelings and emotions.
No, he just simply refused to let him to deal with all that, alone, anymore. The thought of it in itself, hurt enough anyway.
'We're almost there', Celty informed him with her phone.
However, this would still be one long night, he was sure...
~ End of Chapter
Translations
Moshimoshi. - Hello(on the phone).
A/N: What do you think? Do you think it has potential? I'm going to do something some of you may have not ever seen done before. Izaya's amnesia will cause his mind to 'travel' back will go back to when he was still about twelve or thirteen. His personality will be sort of based off of my own perception of him. Also, don't expect his memories to come back all at once of course. He will remember things slowly. There won't be many pairings other than mildly implied canon ones. I do however, plan to include some major (but naturally slow) development between Shizuo and Izaya. This fic will take time for me to write. I keep starting fanfictions, but I really do want to go through with this to the end if possible. I've never written anything with amnesia before, so please be nice, okay? =w=
Thank you, so much. Btw, reviews of all kinds will be greatly appreciated. I like to know when my stories lightens someone's day. Really, thank you, all!
Ja ne~! ^w^