Disclaimer: I own them not. These creations of fiction and only by my imagination expanded by the use of good pie…. And hot chocolate.
Author's Note: This is for you Lara…. All for you….
Josh was stumbling and slurring what few words he could actually manage.
"Donna where am I?" the question lingered for a moment. She gave him a look which clearly meant he should know. She rolled her eyes and tired to help him to the couch.
"You're in my apartment," she answered.
"Yes!" he muttered. "Whose got the condoms?"
"Josh!" Donna shouted in disbelief.
"Right no," he slurred laying back on the couch. "Too far."
He liked Donna's couch. Sure it was old, and broken, and probably owned by a college student before she even looked at it, but for some bizarre reason it felt comfortable. Maybe it was because he only ever really slept on it when he was drunk, and anything felt comfortable then, but still he liked it.
"Am I drunk?" he asked closing his eyes.
Donna began to answer him.
Suddenly Josh felt something leap onto the arm rest of the chair. Something was by his head. He slowly opened his eyes.
"Holy Crap!" he shouted and jumped three feet into the air.
A cat had been staring eye to eye with Josh.
"That cat always sneaks up on me!" he said pointing at the cat.
"For gods sake leave the cat alone," Donna told him.
Josh was eying the cat frantically. "He does it on purpose Donna. He knows that I'm afraid of him. He does. He does these things to freak me out. Every time I close my eyes or I'm not watching my back BAM!" he said throwing his hands in the air as if demonstrated the cats agile movement. "He's always there."
"It's a cat," Donna responded plainly.
"He's a freaky genius cat," Josh slurred. "He can open door knobs."
Donna just gave Josh a slanted look. "It's a cat."
"You keep saying that like it is going to change the fact that he likes to scare the crap out of me."
Donna didn't change the look on her face.
"Every time," Josh continued trying to justify his point, "I stay here you put the cat in your roommates room. Then in the middle of the night he finds me. He attacks me."
"He's a cat Josh," she mumbled. "Just leave him alone."
"I want to!" Josh shouted.
The cat, who had been looking at Josh through this entire act started to move towards him.
"What the hell is he doing!"
"Will you calm down!" Donna said as she went to the laundry closet to get Josh some sheets.
Josh looked at the cat, trying to avoid his piercing stare. "He's smirking at me1"
"He's a cat!" Donna shouted.
The cat pressed up against Josh's leg. Josh tried to jump away. "Joshhh…" the cat hissed.
"He just hissed my name!"
Donna walked back into the room and threw some sheets at him. "If you insist on sleeping on my couch," she shouted. "Will you please leave the cat alone!"
Josh didn't move. Caught between his fear of cats and his fear of angry Donna, he wasn't sure which was more risky.
"He hissed my name!" he shouted after a brief pause. Donna was definitely less scary than cats.
Donna came over and picked up the cat. "I'll lock the door."
She started to walk out of the room, cuddling the kitty.
"It won't work," Josh muttered to himself. "Damn cat will just run into the door until it comes open."
Donna wandered back into the room. "He only bothers you because he likes you."
"He's a cat."
Donna gave him a sarcastic look.
"He's evil Donna," Josh mumbled. "Steal your soul if he wanted."
Donna just walked by and patted him on the head. "Steal your soul," she muttered to herself. "Cat's can't do that." She left him and started walking towards her bedroom. "Just rabbits."