Author's Note: TOTALLY A ONE SHOT. Alternate scene to Clarke and Jaha trying to justify their actions in "The Other Side". I really, really wanted to have Bellamy point out that Clarke's choice was pretty much the worst one ever if she was trying to save the human race, Emori wouldn't have made the list, and neither would Niylah (though in fairness, I suppose she could be bi like Clarke or sign some sort of agreement to help perpetuate the humanity by agreeing to have at least one kid, but I digress...but Clarke ixnayed Harper because of a POTENTIAL health defect from her original list), but how convenient that everyone Clarke wanted made the list, but no one that mattered to Bellamy. Seriously. How did they think this conversation was going to go. "Heeey...the only two people that matter at all to you are left up to suffer a horrifically painful death, but you get to have a bed!"
Also another note: I officially love Octavia again as of the Hunger Games episode. Now that there isn't some teen romance thrown in the mix, they've made her 1) a badass and 2) an actual leader who IS being fair to everyone. Onward!
"This isn't just about saving our people, Bellamy. It's about saving the human race. It's about saving all of us," Clarke pleaded.
Bellamy felt something snap. His vision tunneled so fast he was surprised he didn't stumble, even as he could feel his pulse start to rise, thundering in his ears and his vision washed in red.
"No, no it's not, because if it was, you would know how fucking stupid that sounds," Bellamy snarled. "If this was about saving the human race, not just us, you would know that it means more than just the ones you care about."
"We sent people for all of you," Clarke said. "For you, for Kane, for your sister…but you were the only one we could get to."
Bellamy slammed his hand down on the desk, hitting it hard enough to make even Jaha jump. "Really? Really? How did you know where I was going to be, Clarke? How did you know I was going to be in the middle of the battlefield, trying to make sure that Echo didn't kill my sister by cheating? No one knew where I was except Kane, which means one of two things: you had people watching all of us the whole time, and you could've just as easily grabbed Octavia, or you had to ask Kane. Which means you could've gotten him, too, which means you chose not to."
Clarke floundered, her hands fluttering uselessly at her sides like she wanted to protest, wanted to explain herself but realized there was nothing he was going to listen to.
"You know what, Clarke?" Bellamy said, cocking his head to one side. "I was so glad my mom could never see what I'd become. What I'd done. But then it occurred to me that was exactly what I needed to remember. That she raised me to be good. To do good. And I have been trying like hell to make up for all the things I've done so when I see her again, I can do it knowing I did everything I could to learn from my mistakes." He pulled his lip back in a sneer. "I wonder what your father would think of you now."
"That's not fair," Clarke immediately protested.
"No it isn't, is it?" Bellamy shouted, stepping forwards and forcing Clarke to take a step back if she wanted to stay out of arm's reach. "You know what else isn't fucking fair, Clarke? That everyone you love is down here and everyone I love is up there!"
"That's not true!"
"Really?" Bellamy challenged. "Where's Abby? Down here? How about Niylah? She down here too?"
When Clarke didn't answer, Bellamy fought down the urge to laugh because it would just cement Jaha's belief he was going to need to be in a cage for the next five years. "Of course she fucking is. Fine. What about Monty? What about Harper? You cared enough to kill a mountain full of people for them to live, and now what…they're not worth it?"
Clarke shook her head, eyes shining suspiciously bright in the harsh overhead lighting. "No, of course that isn't it, but we didn't have time. We didn't have a chance to go back and get everyone. Monty was trying to convince the ones still at the Ark to come back with him, but he didn't get back in time. We had to make a choice."
Bellamy shook his head. "No, you didn't. You're not the only one who can offer something. Octavia could've beaten the last four champions. But now, even if she did, when they find out that you went behind everyone's back and stole the bunker, both her and Kane are going to be dead before the radiation even has a chance."
"We couldn't take the risk," Jaha stepped in. "Better to sacrifice a few than all."
"Shut up," Bellamy snarled, jabbing a finger in the former chancellor's direction. "My biggest regret right now is not making sure you were dead after I shot you on the Ark. Without you, there wouldn't have been ALIE."
"Bellamy, we went out of our way to make sure you made it into this bunker," Jaha said, voice pitched low and threateningly. "Don't make us regret that decision."
This time, Bellamy did laugh, because the absurdity of the statement was just that unbelievable. "You think I'm going to sit down here, being the good little soldier, twiddling my thumbs while I know you pretentious bastards are the ones who made the decision to let my sister die trying to save everyone's asses?" He grabbed the nearest object he could, which just so happened to be Jaha's desk lamp and hurled it as hard as he could at the former chancellor.
He missed, but not completely, when Jaha ducked, the lamp catching him off guard enough that Bellamy slammed into the bigger man, driving them both to the ground with Bellamy on top and pinning Jaha to the floor as he punched him in the face.
He managed a solid couple of blows before the others shook themselves free of their shock and tried to pry him off of Jaha.
"You're not helping, Bellamy!" Miller protested, grabbing onto Bellamy's arm before he could land another punch. Instead, Bellamy changed tactics, balling his fist and pulling his arm down, driving his elbow backwards, hard, into Miller's gut.
Well, that's what he'd been aiming for, anyway.
Miller dropped to the floor with a higher pitched grunt of pain than Bellamy expected, but he didn't care.
Two more sets of hands grabbed him, this time pulling him up and back so forcefully he didn't have a chance to hit them like he did Miller.
One wrenched his arm so far up his back he was sure he heard his shoulder pop, but he ignored it. Using their own momentum against them, Bellamy braced his feet against the desk, shoving violently backwards and ramming all three of them into the wall.
Bellamy had made a lot of mistakes.
Not keeping up with hand to hand combat was not one of them.
As one guard's grip on his arm loosened, Bellamy pulled his leg up before slamming in into their knee. It folded with an audible crunch and the younger boy cried out in pain, dropping to the floor clutching at the broken joint.
Bellamy didn't enjoy hurting people.
He brought his elbow up into the other guard's face, connecting hard bone with fragile cartilage and blood spurted everywhere as the kid brought his hands up to his hemorrhaging nose.
He may not enjoy it, but that didn't mean he wasn't good at it.
Bellamy moved for the door, only one thought in his head – Octavia was alive and just on the other side of a door – when electricity shot through him from his back, just below his ribs and he crumpled without a sound.
"I'm sorry, Bellamy," he heard Clarke above him. "But I can't let everyone die because Octavia might not have. I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, but I can't let you open that door. Not for anyone."
The stun baton must've been set high, because Bellamy couldn't form a thought, never mind move a muscle.
He heard more people enter the office, and Jaha give the order to take him some place where he couldn't hurt anyone else. Hands were under his shoulders, turning him over and pulling him to his feet even as the edges of his vision darkened.
"I'm sorry," Clarke repeated. Her mouth was pressed in a thin, firm line, and to Bellamy, she looked anything but sorry.
"Not…yet," Bellamy managed as the new guards fastened cuffs around his wrists as consciousness abandoned him.
But you will be.
Not my best work. Mostly reaction fic. Also, to get a handle on writing Bellamy (even if he's moderately OOC here) before I go back to "Left Behind." But if you like it, love it, hate it, give me a shout out! Sorry, not really a Clarke fan (not really ever, actually). Reviews equal cookies! AND I LOVE COOKIES!