A/N - Set in the aftermath of THAT kiss at the end of Series 3, episode 8 ... my take on how episode 9 could have developed - thought it was time Connor finally challenged Abby on her behaviour.

Disclaimer: Not mine, no copyright intended ... and I have borrowed part of episode 9, I'll put it back when I've had my fun ;)

Connor had been in a daze for the last two days. Had Abby really kissed him, or was it just a wonderful dream? He debated whether to call her or not; just what was the etiquette when your best friend kisses you? He didn't want to make a fool of himself yet again, nor did he want to seem too keen and scare her off. As he sat huddled on his armchair in Lester's flat, he decided he would talk to her on Monday at the ARC – he just needed to pluck up the courage to say the words he really wanted to say.

His thoughts were interrupted by the doorbell. He almost didn't answer it, it was one of Lester's new rules, but he was glad he did. It was Abby, carrying a large cardboard box. What was she doing here though?

"Hi!" she said, a little nervously.

"Hi. Erm. Come in." Connor replied, equally as nervous. "Follow me." He led Abby down the hallway, a little puzzled and feeling more that just a little awkward. Maybe she wanted to know why he hadn't called her? He wasn't ready for this yet, his courage was still stuck in the pit of his stomach and tying it in knots. "You'd better come through." He indicated towards the lounge, noting that she was looking all around her. Anywhere but at him directly.

Abby smiled nervously. "I expect you're wondering why I'm here."

Connor shrugged, and tried to appear casual despite the fact his heart was racing. He watched Abby place the box on the floor and open it, letting Rex jump out.

"Rex was lonely." Abby said. Again, Connor noted she was looking everywhere but at him.

He whistled and called Sid and Nancy over. "Guys!" The two diictodons scurried over to greet their old friend and there was happy chirruping and grunting. "That's cute!" Connor smiled. Then, he looked up to face Abby, just as she turned to look at him for the first time since she'd arrived. This was it. He knew he had to say something to her, but the words wouldn't come. His stomach churned and his throat went dry as he looked into her eyes. God, he loved her so much and he couldn't get that kiss out of his head! … but why did she look so nervous?

"I wanted to erm… I just don't want things to be weird between us." Abby said.

Connor's heart sank. She was backing off. She regretted kissing him, he knew it!

"Absolutely! Me neither." Connor mumbled, shaking his head. "Don't want any sort of weird with … no weird areas here." He had tried to lighten the mood by doing a funny voice, but he instantly regretted it when he saw the look of horror on Abby's face. "I'm being weird aren't I?"

"Yeah." Abby said, frozen to the spot and looking at Connor in disbelief.

"Sorry." He muttered. His heart was breaking into a thousands pieces and he could feel his eyes stinging with tears. Thankfully, the sound of Sid running around made Abby turn away and the awkward tension was broken. He glanced at her and saw her swallow nervously; what if he had misread her? Surely she hadn't just come here because Rex wanted to see Sid and Nancy? Perhaps there was still a glimmer of hope…

"I don't suppose, now that Jack's moved out that .. you know…" he moved his hand in a circular motion, indicating himself, Sid and Nancy. Abby smiled. Yes! There was still a chance. "Yes?"

"Yes." Abby said. "They can move back in."

That was it. Connor's heart was completely ripped out. Why did he keep letting her do this to him? Love wasn't supposed to hurt like this, was it? He bit his bottom lip, trying to force back the tears. He wouldn't give her the satisfaction of knowing she had made him cry. He watched her wander slowly around the flat, and decided that she had hurt him for the last time. It was time to face up to the fact that she didn't love him and move on with his life.

"Nice place, you must love it here." She said.

"Yeah, but it's not home is it." he said. He could feel anger welling up inside him. "In fact, I don't know where home is any more."

"Are you OK, Connor?" Abby said.

"No Abby, I'm far from OK!" he snapped. He'd had enough, it was time she knew exactly what she'd done to him these last few months.

"If this is about you moving back in, then it's not a problem." she was saying.

"You know what Abby? I don't even want to be around you right now, let alone live with you!" he could hear his voice getting louder.

"What's wrong, Connor?" Abby said softly, moving towards him.

"Well, that just about sums it up doesn't it? You don't have a clue how I'm feeling right now, and that's how it's always been between us, Abby." Connor said angrily, squaring himself up.

Abby had only ever seen Connor like this once before, and that was when she had teased him about Caroline. He wasn't the sort of person that got angry very often, so when he did it was a shock. "Then why don't you tell me how you're feeling, Connor? Maybe I can help you." She tried to remain calm, arguing with Connor was the last thing she wanted.

"I've spent the last two days wondering what I should do, trying to pluck up the courage to …" he couldn't get the words out, it hurt too much.

"I don't blame you for feeling confused." Abby said. "I'm confused too, Connor. I thought you had feelings for me, but when you didn't kiss me back …" she shook her head and wiped her eyes.

"It's more than just the kiss though, Abby. For months now you've been flirting with me, giving me little glimmers of hope, and then pushing me away. I don't know how I'm supposed to behave around you! Do you realise how much that hurts? The look on your face when someone mistakes us for a couple tears me apart, and when you said 'he's not my boyfriend' only minutes after I'd stopped you falling off that cliff and said that I loved you, it felt like my world had been shattered." Connor felt a tear fall down his cheek as he spoke, and he wiped it with his hand angrily. He was not going to shed any more tears over Abby Maitland, he'd already wasted too many on her.

"I'm sorry, Connor. I didn't realise that I'd hurt you." Abby said. "If I'd known…" she took a deep breath. "You mean more to me than anyone else in the world." She tried to take his hand, but he pulled it away.

"Yeah? I mean so much to you that you kick me out of my home in favour of your kid brother." Connor spat.

"We can sort this out." Abby said. "Come back to the flat and we can talk properly."

Connor shook his head. "It's too late, Abby. I can't take any more of this from you. I think you should just leave now. Take Sid and Nancy."

Abby began ushering the three creatures into the box as Connor stood watching. She sealed the box and picked it up. "Are you sure about this, Connor? Maybe when you've had time to think, we can talk about…"

"Just go, Abby. It's best for both of us. I'll start looking for my own place, and pick up the rest of my things once I'm sorted." Connor turned away. Was he doing the right thing? Should he give her another chance?

"I guess I'll see you tomorrow." Abby said. She made her way back down the hallway, pausing to allow Connor to open the door. He watched her walk down to her car and put the box on the back seat. He could have sworn he saw her glance back up and wipe her eyes, but maybe that was just wishful thinking.

Slumping down on the sofa, Connor buried his head in his hands. He had never felt so lost and alone as he did right now, and it was probably going to get worse before it got better. How do you fall out of love with someone who meant more to you than life itself?

-o-