*Lucky Channel Theme*
Akira: Hiya Luckies! =D On today's show we're gonna be looking at Mana-chan's-
Morganne: Ahem! /^ ^\!
Akira: WHAT! ( o_o)
Morganne: The readers aren't here to listen to you. They're here to read the first installment of MY story. So SHOVE OFF! *Akira disappears through a trap door* ^o^ Now that SHE's out of the way allow me to introduce someone. Say hello to the Last Handmaiden, Brianna Kae! *claps hands enthusiastically* *spotlight moves over to opening in curtains* Brianna? Bree? *crickets chirping* Hehehehe ehh -_-; BRIANNA KAE!
Brianna: No! I'm not going out there!
Morganne: :D Whoever said you had a choice?
Brianna: o_0 You wouldn't dare hurt me! l_l' Right?
Morganne: 3:) You forget I control your fate in this fic. Let's say I pair you with the Disciple, hmm?
Brianna: *Comes out wearing Visas's robes* Morganne owns the plot line and WISHES she owned Knights of the Old Republic.
Morganne: Hey! A girl can dream can't she? Anyway, enjoy!
"Owww!" I whined and clutched my poor widdle head. When the pain finally stopped, I took a good look at my surroundings. Let's see, I spy metal, lots of metal. Could I be on a cruise somehow? No that's ridiculous, I don't feel the slightest bit seasick. The last time I was on the water sailing, I'd been violently sick the entire time. I couldn't go five seconds without emptying my stomach over the railing. But, I hear the rumbling of an engine.
What in Tartarus is going on? One minute I'm getting ready for bed, and the next I'm somewhere with a whole lot of metal. "Okay Kiki, let's see where we are." I was laying down on a slightly uncomfortable mattress against the right side of the wall, if you came in from the hallway. Step two of figuring out where you are, ask somebody. I got off the bed a little shaky and wobbled my way out into the corridor and looked around the corner, what I saw shook me to the core.
I saw Chris Hemsworth, half-naked! I kid, I kid, but I still began panicking. Allow me to shed a little light on the subject. (Turns on the lights) Well, first off, there was this big round thing projecting a globe within a net of dots, and I figured out where I was, and why the spot I woke up looked familiar. Even if I didn't mention it. I was on the mother trucking Ebon Hawk! Fastest ship in the galaxy! At least, until the Millenium Falcon rolls around in a few centuries.
Panic attack setting in! Breathe Kiki, breathe!
I AM breathing, you dolt!
Well, stop HYPERVENTILATING! And you do know you called yourself an idiot?
SMACK! Aw, the sound of a facepalm. Sometimes I wish I wasn't so sarcastic, but where's the fun in that? I can't believe I'm arguing with myself. It's inconceivable, inconceivable I say! Well, maybe not so inconceivable considering I'm still PANICKING! One sound slap to the face later, I calm down. I just came out of the starboard dorm, so Visas hasn't shown up to assassinate the Exile. Speaking of which, is the Exile the canon version? You know, Meetra Surik. Or she might be one of the other females available in character creation! She might not even be a she! She could be a he!
Nope. Must. Not. Panic! Imagining the imp Panic being squashed under my boot that I apparently wore to bed, I felt a bit better. I look into the storage room and I spy one deactivated HK-47. And no Mira for that matter. So we could be anywhere between Telos and Nar Shadaa. Which really doesn't narrow anything down when you think about. I slump against the holoprojector in the room and - wait! The navigation map! It should have the Hawk's current location! I dash for the cockpit and trip over my own two feet and faceplanted. "Verdammt!" Stupid two left feet! Wish I could trade them in for Winry's automail creations. Naw, I'd still be just as clumsy. What was I doing again? Oh yeah! To the cockpit! Heigh Ho Silver! Away! Oh I hope my Aurebesh isn't too rusty.
Before I look at the screen that says where the Ebon Hawk is, the view from the view ports distracts me. I see a little bit of purple up in a room overlooking the hangar. I think I know where I am, but I'm not sure so I check the Plot-A-Course Screen. And, yep. I'm on Telos, and not just anywhere on Telos. I'm in Atris's Polar Academy. I'm overjoyed for about three seconds before the gravity of the situation slams me like, well, like a ton of bricks. I'm in a ship that was spirited away to the polar regions of Telos, by Atris who meditates in a chamber filled to the brim with Sith holocrons and her crazy handmaidens. Well, Brianna isn't so bad. And before you ask, yes I played through on the male track. And honestly, the male exile's got it better. Have you seen the Disciple? Ohmigod, talk about goody two shoes. And I'm the queen of Goody Goody Land! Guy Exile's got Visas and Brianna. Who does Lady Exile get? Disciple that's who! Although I did detect hints that Atton's in love with her. Oh, please be the Male Exile, pretty please with sugar on top? But, I get ahead of myself. Exile, Atton, and Kreia (Hate her!) could have just been arrested by the TSF, or they're on their way here with Bao-Dur. Just when I settled in for the wait, my bottomless pit of a stomach roared. I kid you not, I thought a LION snuck aboard. I could hear it screaming, "Feed me Kiki!" Or, and most likely, I was so hungry I was delusional. So, against my better judgment, I left the Ebon Hawk. Maybe the Echani are nice.
"Who are you and how did you get here?" I down my nose at the ends of several staves, held by none other than the handmaidens of Atris. Minus Brianna. Talk about sibling rivalry. Have you heard the way they trash talk her when you spar with them? Rude much!
"Before I answer your two questions, let me ask two of my own," I responded with the chill worthy of Atris, I hope. "Where did you get those boots and that outfit? I want a pair!" And behold my insanity. At least I confused them. You might even say they were taken aback. Certainly shocked, the handmaidens were. They lowered their weapons for an instant before the staves were in my face again. *Sigh* "My name is Keira Locani and I haven't the foggiest idea how I got here. I just woke up five minutes ago!" I rambled a bit more and probably didn't make any sense, but it got the Echani ghost women out of my face.
Unfortunately, they hauled me to the meeting chamber, the one where the Exile confronts Atris and where Brianna beats her sisters. In their rush to get me to Atris for my interrogation, my Echani entourage and I pass by the poor dear. I honestly feel bad for her. She tries so hard to be the Echani warrior her sisters want her to be and they don't even help her! At least she's not Atris's robot like her sisters. She gives us a quizzical glance, especially me since my red hair looks like a splash of blood in this ice fortress, before going off to train or something.
I really don't see what all the fuss over me was for. Sure, I showed up mysteriously in a place that no one was supposed to know about. But these women REALLY need to cut down on the dramatics. One of my five escorts dashed ahead, presumably to retrieve her mistress. I never liked her, finding out that she'd fallen only made the dislike stronger. But she's tolerable, I guess. So long as you don't mention the Mandalorian Wars. Thinking of that caused my face to split in two as a Cheshire grin appeared out of thin air. I swiped the smile off of my face before anyone could see my manic side. I did say I was insane, right? I think that anyone who says they're insane really is or actually is sane, but if a person says that they're sane, then they're lying. Ah, who cares what I think. Ignore the crazy Utahn!
And speaking of crazy, here comes Atris down her impossibly long bridge that stretches over a chasm. Note to self: Don't look down. The moment she stopped in front of me, I bowed low and said, "Master Atris, Jedi historian, Mistress of the Archives, and Council woman that exiled the only Jedi to return from Revan's Crusade. By the way, how goes the plans for restoring the Jedi Order? Swimmingly I hope?" Ah, it's just so much fun messing with people! Personally, I love shocking people into silence. Mission: Startle Atris has been accomplished!
"H-how do you-"
"How do I know you and that you wanted the Exile punished even more severely? Or maybe how I know about your plans? It's simple really. It's for me to know and you to NEVER figure out." And with that spiel, I played pazaak in my head, much like Atton does. No way I'm gonna let the ice queen in my head. See, I know everything about KotOR 2. I've played it enough times to be able to finish in twenty four hours AND complete every bonus mission.
I know Atton, Mira, Bao-Dur, Kreia, Visas, T3-M4, Brianna, Mical (Disciple) like the back of my hand. I have no idea about Hanharr, G0-T0, HK-47, and Mandalore, though. Mostly because I've only ever done the Light Side ending and play through. Can't stand the Dark Side, it's just sickening! My rant can go on and on but back to the present. I could feel Atris's probe poking at my mind and only hitting my shield. Even before I learned Atton's trick, I've always been able to deflect psychic probes. All that Atris will find is a wall made of mirrors and will only feel herself in the wall. If I wasn't busy keeping Atris at bay, it would be Hammer Time! Nuh-uh, can't touch this!
Feeling the probe withdraw, I spoke up, "I don't take too kindly to people poking around in my brain, thank you very much!"
True to her ice queen exterior, Atris betrayed no emotion, "My apologies, in these dark times one must err on the side of caution."
"Like you did in the Mandalorian Wars? Oh wait a minute! Had Revan been as cautious, countless more would have died!" I hissed at the hateful woman. She may be tolerable if you're outside of the game, but up close and personal she is more than I can take.
"How would you know about such things, you are merely a child!" Ah, the smell of anger and barely suppressed rage. Appetizing for a Dark Jedi, I'm sure. Not so much for a Goody Goody empath.
I tossed my crimson hair over my shoulder. "I know more about Revan's motives than you could eve hope to know! And whatever happened to 'There is no emotion; there is peace,' Jedi Master Atris?" I put extra emphasis on the last three words. Out of the corner of my eye, I see the Handmaidens starting to back away slowly. I kinda feel bad for the poor Handmaidens, they're innocent bystanders in this particular argument. I actually prefer the original Code of the Jedi.
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet the Force. It's quite clear that a Jedi is to acknowledge their weaknesses, accept them, and strive to better herself. A shame that that code is forgotten in this time. I pierced Atris with my silver eyes, a trait shared by my siblings. In this world, I feel wise, I know the route that the Exile might take. Unfortunately, I only know the Light path. I hope the Exile is set on being a Jedi and won't go after the Masters for revenge.
Atris took in a calming breath. Good, she hasn't fallen too far then. "You are right, of course. Strange that one so young knows more about Revan than I." Or maybe she has fallen, I see the malignant glint in her eyes. I completely forgot that I don't wield the Force as she does! I don't think I'm Force sensitive at all! Time to swallow this piece of humble pie.
"No, I overstepped my bounds. You are a Jedi, one of the last remaining in the Galaxy. I have no right to scold you. I'm sorry." Ugh, this pie is awful! But if I'm to live until the Exile comes, whoever he or she may be, I'll need to swallow my pride and feast on humble pie. I bent myself at the waist until my torso was parallel to the floor. Not to show Atris how sorry I was, oh no. But to hide my disgust at eating that pie!
"Your apology is accepted. Perhaps you may stay awhile until arrangements can be made for you elsewhere?" It wasn't a question, not really. It was a thinly veiled order, for sure.
Standing straight, I inclined my head. "Thank you, Master Atris, for your kindness and generosity." "I shall remove her mistress." "EEP!" Brianna scared me! Not only did I prostrate myself and humiliate myself in front of Atris, now I must seem a mouse or something similar to her. As Brianna escorted me away from the falling Jedi Master, I pondered over the merits of being a mouse. At the very least she won't pay much attention to me during my stay. Hearing a mumbling in my ears I surface from my thoughts. "I'm sorry, I didn't quite catch that."
"I asked you how you know about Atris's plans," the last Handmaiden stated.
I chuckled at that. Already they were trying to interrogate me. "C'mon, it isn't that hard to figure out. She's the 'Last of the Jedi,' yes? Of course she'll try to restore the Order." See those apostrophes? Yeah, I air quoted that bit. Oh! And I switched my accent around as I spoke. I went from American, to posh British, to a Southern twang, then to Spanish, and finished off with a Scottish brogue. Confusing people, not just one of my hobbies, it's a talent that I always have possessed.
If I didn't know better, I'd say I was using the Jedi Mind Trick. Before Brianna could respond to my nonsense, my stomach roared again. I'm actually surprised it hadn't complained in front of Atris. I would have definitely died from humiliation then. As it was, I think I scared Brianna into thinking that a monster was loose in the academy. I put a hand on her shoulder to calm her and nearly lost it in the process. Memo: Don't touch Echani trained fighters when they drop into a battle stance. "It was just my stomach, Bree. Not some beast. I haven't eaten in who knows how long and I need food!"
She opened her mouth to say something, presumably why I called her Bree, when my stomach roared again. Curse my skin for blushing so easily! Brianna chuckled next to me and I'm afraid to say that I glomped her. "Finally! Does no one laugh in this ice hole?" I answer my own question, "Of course not! Your sisters are much too cold and analytical and Atris is too worked up over the past. You're the only one with a warm bone in her body!"
She smiled down at me sadly, "That is not a good thing. I'm too passionate. I-"
"Let me stop you right there. Life is about finding things you feel passionately about. People who make you happy and support you are what you need. Not five half-sisters who put you down and say your the least of them. They're just jealous that your guys' father left their mother for yours." Too late do I realize my mistake. Brianna's eyes narrow at me in suspicion and I feel as if my life is in danger.
"How do you know about my mother? Only Atris and my sisters know." Crap, crap, crap, CRAP!
Quick, think of something fast!
What do you think I'm doing, twiddling my thumbs!?
Well you better say something, she's getting madder by the nano-second!
"Umm . . . I . . ." Wait, I got it! "I know because MY dad did the same thing. I hated the hussy for making Dad leave Mom, I still do. And I hated my half-brother when he was born, even if he was innocent of all crimes. I look at your sisters and see the same emotions I felt towards Jason. I got over hating him ages ago but I still feel the flash of anger at him. So, I know what your sisters are putting you through, because I caused my baby brother the same pain." It's sad, but true. I was a kid in my defense and anyone who stole my daddy from me was toast! I'm a complete Daddy's Girl. At some point during my monologue, Brianna and I had gotten to her sleeping quarters where she had food to eat.
My words sparked my old jealousies and hatred, until I squashed them back into my Pandora's box. Tears gathered into the pale girl's eyes and little sniffles could be made out. I'd be crying to if some stranger brought up old wounds and hurt. "Hey, I'm sorry. Let's eat something before my stomach decides to eat itself." A smile shined from Brianna's tearful visage and I knew things were okay between us. I think.
Wheee! We're in a chapter, and it's my longest yet! Nearly 3,000 words! I know, I'm pitiful. Anyway, just a little update on those of you who have read Inari's Agent. I have NOT abandoned Kitty. We're not exactly on speaking terms. I just wrote up a scene where she's kidnapped er foxnapped by Kakashi, and she's not happy. l_l'
Kitty: Not happy's an understatement, don't you think?
Morganne: Kitty! You've come back to me! *Morganne uses Glomp!*
Kitty: *dodges* For your information, I have not come back. You're too busy coming up with tuition money for college anyway.
Morganne: *teary eyed* Oh thank you! Thank you for understanding!
Kitty: Yeah yeah. I don't think your readers are so understanding though.
Morganne: What makes you say that?
Kitty: They're readying pitchforks and torches.
Morganne: O_O Aw, razzing frazzing nubble trouble! Well, see ya!
Kitty: *left choking on dust* Don't look at me, I don't know when she'll be back! Although I must say, I really want to get out of Kakashi's clutches.
Kakashi: .) Who said you will?
Kitty: o_0 Don't just sit there! Help me! *Gets dragged off by Kakashi*