Just something I thought up while reading TVtropes and finding a ton of stuff that made me go "WTF?". Just thought I'd make an alternative version of this one major thing I hated. Well two of them. Edward's scene is much shorter.

Bella's Scenrio

Bella wasn't quite sure what to do when she found out that Jacob's nasty ass imprinting on her child and liked it and didn't mind it at all. He even gave the excuse that he sense the egg and...just ew! What made it worse was that she could have ended up having sex and then a baby with him and then her daughter and he...just the thought made her want to throw up. She wasn't sure if she wanted to attack him or hit him with one of the Cullen's car. Wait she was a Cullen. Perhaps she should respond to them by one of their names first instead of calling them "The Cullens". Anyways, if she were to, taking Roselle's car would be the best choice. She wasn't a huge fan of werewolves...uh shapeshifters and she knew the older woman well enough to know that if she "borrowed" her car to smash into Jacob, she wouldn't care. Hell she'd laugh.

She had considered doing just that but didn't find a way to do it. He always had the baby in his arms and when he didn't, he was near her. If only there was a way to get his disgusting ass outside and in a spot where she could find her mark. She thought about getting her dad to get her to teach her to shoot a gun, but then again silver bullets probably didn't work on Jacob. She'd sure as hell try though. Given that Edward couldn't read her thoughts, she could get with it...no. No she couldn't. Jacob's pack would wonder about him though she could say it was an accident. Yes. That was what she needed, but she needed help.

'What are you thinking, Bella?' She asked herself as she pretended to read a magazine in her bedroom. 'You can't kill Jacob. You know good and well you still care about him.'

'But do you want to go through 7 years thinking about how he can't wait to be with her once she turns 18?' agrued a small part of her. 'How she can't pick her own mate because of Jacob's nasty ass? This isn't the middle ages or country where arranged marriages are done, hun.'

'Then what can we do?'

'Leave.'

'How? Alice can see me, remember?'

'Use your head, Bells,' Bella sat there for a moment thinking and then she came up with something to which the other voice congratulated her. Then Bella called herself crazy for having a second voice, but pushed the questioning of the voice in the back of her head in order to set off and get what she needed done.

She quickly packed up her daughter's things as well her own before cramming them in her car. Afterwards, she found Alice watching TV with the others and asked her if she could come with her. Alice met outside and Bella jumped straight to the point. "I'm getting the hell outta here and if you tell anyone, I'll go on a hunting spree for human blood, got it?" She hadn't meant that last part and hoped Alice didn't think she was bluffing.

"What?" Alice's eyes widened at the woman's words. "You're leaving? But why?"

"One word: Jacob," she responded. "I refuse to have him dating my daughter!"

Alice tried her best to reason with Bella, telling her that Jacob would go looking for them and Edward sure as heck would. Bella assured her that she would email Edward and meet up with him until she could shake Jacob off her trail. Alice mentioned the werewolf would ask where she was, but the raven haired woman told her to just lie which didn't make her sister-in-law very comfortable. She doesn't lie about her visions and if she did, she was afraid she was going to lose someone's trust or more than one person's trust. The younger woman didn't care. She was too worried about her daughter not getting a choice in who she ends up with. She wanted her kid to be able to pick her own mate like she did with Edward.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" asked Alice placing both of her hands on her shoulders.

"I'm sure. As long as you keep your mouth shut, we'll be fine."

"But what if...?"

"If it's about Jacob, I really don't care. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go get my daughter."

Edward's Scenario

"So can I call you dad?" grinned Jacob, all the while saying this playfully. The two men looked at each other and they shared a laugh before Edward snapped Jacob's neck.

"Thank you for saving me the trouble of ripping him apart," said Bella as she kissed her husband's cheek.

"Anytime. I've been wanting to do that since the moment I met that mutt," said Edward feeling happier than the day he married his wife. "'Can I call you dad?' Fuck outta here, punk."

Say what you wanna say about the whole imprinting thing, but I think it's nasty and that's the moment where I started disliking Jacob. I would have liked it better if Jacob would have just cared for the kid like an uncle and just have that be their relationship for the rest of their lives and give Bella's daughter a love interest that's like her.