Author Notes: Uh, yeah, very shameful, it's so short, but this was for a contest on Greatest Journal.
Why Pirates Shouldn't Drink
It was a dull, but beautiful day. Luffy's crew had decided that they needed a bit of a break from pirating, so they had docked ship at the nearest port and separated into groups or merely went out as individuals, enjoying the sudden calm of the small city they'd landed at and the fine weather they'd been gifted with.
Sanji and Zoro had decided that they might as well go around together, perhaps get wasted or just yell insults at each other to pass the time and maybe scare a few of the locals. So far, the duo had accomplished scaring the locals, but not because of any yelling they might have done, but more of how much alcohol they had consumed without keeling over with alcohol poisoning.
So now, sitting at a wooden table in a bar across from each other, the smashed duo looked hazy-eyed at each other, wondering what to do next.
"Sooo. . . whaddaya wanna do now?" Each word that slipped from Sanji's mouth slurred with the next, making it almost impossible to understand the cook. However, the drunken swordsman that was sitting at the table with him understood and roared with laughter, pointing a finger at the blond.
"Bwuahahahaha! You're smashed man!" Still laughing outrageously, Zoro leaned forward, quieting his laughter to slight giggles every now and then and giving Sanji a drunkenly serious look. "I say. . ." he whispered, "we keep drinking. . . 'cause I dunno about you, but I'm still seein' straight." Little did he know, his words were slurring as well.
Sanji leaned forward, the look on his face mirroring his 'partner in drinking''s. "I say. . . You're right. . ."
"Good. . . 'cause I am. . ."
"Yeah. . ."
"Yeah."
Suddenly, Sanji, threw himself on the swordsman, delivering the green haired a very sloppy, drunk kiss. He pulled away almost immediately, looking down at the man underneath him with a certain victorious gleam in his eyes.
"I got it," he stated.
"Wha?"
"There was still some of that. . . whatever we was drinking. . caught on yer lips. And you thought you could hide it from me." Sanji drunkenly waggled a finger in Zoro's face.
". . . I'm not gay. . ." With that stated and firmly established, Zoro pounced on Sanji, switching their positions and immediately beginning to undress the cook.
Just as the cook had thrown a boot over Zoro's shoulder, Luffy and Nami picked that time to enter the bar. Catching the book, Nami gave it a suspicious look before following the trail of clothing over to the table Zoro and Sanji were having sex under.
"Well, you see Luffy? This is why I don't drink. . ."