When he woke up that morning, the first thing on Beast Boy's mind was that he was not ready to face the worst day of his life.
He slammed down the snooze button and closed his eyes against the sunlight streaming through the cracks in his bedroom window. It looked like a beautiful day outside. Great. Just what the most horrible day in history calls for – perfect weather.
When his alarm went off again, he grabbed it and threw it across the room, and then completed his daily morning ritual of rolling over and scrolling through his phone. Today, he avoided Snapchat and Facebook, but went straight for Reddit to catch up on the day's hot news and look for some new joke material. He saw one post mentioning Cyborg and the Justice League, but scrolled past it. Eventually he got bored and was going to actually get up and start his day, but his phone started ringing with some calming violin sounds – Raven's tone.
He hurriedly checked his hair in the black screen before pressing "Answer." Raven's hooded face filled the phone. "Beast Boy, are you coming to breakfast soon? Cyborg's leaving in half an hour." A red and white blur whoosed by in the background, jostling Raven and knocking her hood down. "Watch it!" she shouted, looking over her shoulder as her eyes sparked with dark energy. Beast Boy heard a screech and the sound of what he assumed was Mas and Menos crashing to the ground. He couldn't help but giggle at Raven's smug face.
"You tell 'em, Rae-Rae!"
"Idiot. Get down here. There are still some pancakes left if you want them."
Beast Boy saluted. "Yes, ma'am, Raven, ma'am." As her brows lowered in annoyance, Beast Boy waved his hand and laughed. "Come on, I'm just kidding. I'll be down soon."
"Alright. Bye."
"Bye." The screen went black, and Beast Boy could feel his heart sinking in his chest. This was it – it was really happening. There was no point in trying to avoid it any more. He got out of bed and ready to emerge from his room, but the whole time he felt as if he was moving in a sea of molasses. He not only felt sad – he also felt guilty. As Cyborg's best friend, he should've been the first at the going-away party. He grabbed the present that sat beside his door, and began the long trek to the main room of Titans Tower.
Even before the doors opened, he could hear the loud cacophony that was 20-something, 20-something Titans all crammed together in a room for breakfast. Normally, Beast Boy would jump at the chance to party with friends, but now he was just annoyed by them. But this wasn't about him. It was about Cyborg. Okay, okay. Just breathe, and go – oh, and smile!
Drawing his lips into a hopefully-convincing grin, Beast Boy burst into the common room. "What's up, Titans?" he yelled, drawing several pairs of eyes towards him.
"B!" cried a voice that rose above all the others in the room. "You made it, man!" Cyborg left his spot near Bumblebee and the meat table and made his way through the crowd and over to Beast Boy. The metal man slapped Beast Boy on the back joyfully. "I was afraid you were gonna sleep through my party!"
Beast Boy grinned even more widely and rubbed the back of his neck. "No, dude, I would never miss your going-away party. I just didn't want to have to deal with piles of meat first thing in the morning." He gestured towards the buffet of bacon, sausage, friend chicken, chicken steak, chorizo, and ham that adorned the long kitchen island. "There's like 50 me-corpses on that table!"
"Yeah, but we made you a tofu plate." Cyborg grinned as he pointed to a tiny tea plate on the very end near the door, stacked neatly with a few cubes of tofu.
Beast Boy nudged his friend in the side. "Well, joke's on you. Raven told me that there were pancakes to be had. That's the only reason I came down – not because you're leaving or anything." He remembered the package he was still holding in his hand. "Oh, and I got you this present, too, but, y'know, again, not because you're leaving."
"Awww, B, you shouldn't have!" Cyborg cried melodramatically. He wrapped Beast Boy his in arms and lifted him off the ground. Beast Boy felt his soul slightly leave his body as Cyborg crushed the breath out of him. He staggered when Cyborg let him go, but was steadied by a hand on his shoulder. Raven.
"Cyborg," she said, "Kole and Gnark just got here. They're waiting over by the door."
"Aw, nice! Thanks, Raven. See you guys in a minute." Cyborg rushed off to say good-bye to the newest members of the party.
"Going away parties are weird," Beast Boy said to Raven as they stood side-by-side, looking over the main room. "It's like, 'Oh, hi, welcome to the party! I'm just gonna leave now, and maybe I'll see you again at Christmas, but also maybe bye forever!' I mean, how can people be happy about that?"
He could feel Raven's eyes studying him, trying to figure him out. "Well, we're happy that Victor is moving on to bigger and better things. He's joining the Justice League, which has been a dream of his for a long time…"
"Yeah, yeah, I know! But why does he have to move on? And what is bigger and better than saving the world with your family?"
Raven's elbow softly nudged him in the arm. "But didn't you…"
At that moment, Kid Flash appeared out of nowhere. "Aw, look at the lovebirds talking together!" he shouted so that whole part of the room could hear him. "Raven and Beast Boy, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-Ahhhh!" The speedster suddenly found himself upside-down in the grip of a tentacle of dark energy.
"Aw, look at the poor speedster, caught in a trap," taunted Raven.
"Guess your mouth really moved faster than your brain there, huh?" Only a few moans met Beast Boy's fantastic pun. He crossed his arms and pouted.
"Beast Boy, get over it. Your puns are terrible. And Kid Flash, don't you have a girlfriend you need to be spending your time with?"
"Nah." Kid Flash vibrated through Raven's energy then through the ground floor, disappearing for a split second. Then he was standing in front of them again, wearing a proud smirk. "We're not on the 'best of terms' at the moment. You know how it is."
"No, I don't," Raven said. "But I don't really care, either. Isn't there somewhere else you could be?"
At that moment, another figure joined them, putting his hands around the shoulders of both Raven and Kid Flash. "Hola, Amigos!" said Aqualad in his cheerful, cheeky voice. "Long time no see, Raven and Beast Boy!"
"Dude, what's up?" said Beast Boy, also trying to be cheerful. There was always something about Aqualad that threw him off; and he really wanted him to go away. Not that he was going to say so. "Have you tried all the meats they have here?"
Aqualad pulled a face. "All except for the 'brunch shrimp,' whatever that is."
"Tell me about it. It's like 'Insult Animal-Friendly Heroes' day or something."
Kid Flash laughed. "You guys seriously need to get over it. All I ever hear from you guys is 'don't eat fish' this, and 'I'm vegan' that. Get over yourselves."
Raven's face had disappeared deeply into her hood since the arrival of Aqualad. "It is admirable to diligently keep to those standards, though. So many people are too easy to compromise their beliefs."
Aqualad's booming, confident laugh rang out. "See? Even Raven thinks we're right. I think you need to get over your own self, KF."
"Yeah, and now you sound just like my girlfriend," said Kid Flash with a dismissive wave.
Beast Boy's stomach suddenly growled at him. "Ooh, hey, Raven? Where are those pancakes you mentioned?"
She gave one small glance at Aqualad, who was now turning away and arguing with Kid Flash, before she stepped away and lightly grasped Beast Boy's wrist. "Come on, I'll show you."
He let himself be led away, but couldn't help but ribbing her slightly. "So, you still have a crush on Aqualad?"
Her hand tightened on his wrist before she dropped it completely. "I don't know what you're talking about." Her voice was tense. She stopped and turned to face him, arms crossed in front of her chest. Challenging. Waiting.
Beast Boy also crossed his arms. "Yeah, whatever! I saw that look, Rae. You still totally dig him, don't you?"
"Whether or not that's true is none of your business, Beast Boy. So just leave it alone." She pointed over her shoulder. "The pancakes are over there. I hope you enjoy them." Her cloak swished as she turned to walk away, but he stopped her with a hand on the shoulder.
"Whoa, Raven! I'm sorry for teasing you, but don't just leave!"
They stood like that for a moment, Beast Boy willing her to just turn around and acknowledge him. He knew the odds were stacked more towards her just walking away, but he hoped that it would be different this time.
His heart still jumped slightly when she turned to face him again. She even pulled the hood down from her face, and brought her eyes up to meet his. Her mouth was a grim line. "I'm… sorry for overreacting. I know you're just teasing, but I just really don't want to talk about it."
He stepped slightly closer, so that his hand could rest more comfortably on her shoulder. "Fine, I get it, and I promise I won't tease you about it again. Will you pleeeasseee come and eat a pancake or two with me? I don't really feel like being alone, with Cyborg leaving and everything."
Her eyes met his for a brief second, and he was almost sure that she was smiling behind those eyes, although her mouth didn't move. She grasped the hand that was on her shoulder, and his pulse sped up. But she only slid it off her shoulder. "I would love to, but I promised Jinx that I would find her. She really wants to talk about Kid Flash, and I'm trying to be a somewhat good friend to her."
He put on his best smile. "Okay. Um, but are we still gonna catch the Game of Thrones premiere tonight?"
"Of course. I couldn't miss it, thanks to George R.R. Martin and his stupid clliffhangers." She truly smiled at him this time. "See you later. Try not to get too upset while I'm gone." She waved a hand and walked away.
"Bye." He made his way over to the pile of disappointingly cold pancakes and piled a few onto a mostly clean plate. His eyes followed Raven as she made her way across the room, to where Bumblebee and Jinx were sitting together and gigging while casting quick looks over to Aqualad and Kid Flash. He couldn't help but feel proud of his friend. She had really been working on reaching out to other people lately. There was a rash part of him that was also annoyed that she would choose to help Jinx over himself – after all, hadn't they been friends much longer? – but he was doing his best to suffocate that voice under a pillow of overt happiness.
His thoughts and interest in food completely derailed, though, when he saw the horrific sight of Jericho and Cyborg, sitting on the couch, controllers in hand, without him.
He didn't want to disturb Cyborg at his party, of course – he wanted to be a good friend, the best of friends even – but his irrational anger overtook him. He tricked himself into thinking that he was going to gently place his plate of unwanted pancakes back onto the counter and go outside for some space; what really happened was that his traitorous limbs slammed the plate onto the counter so hard that the resonating crack drew the whole room's attention. Shards of white porcelain scattered over the counter and floor, and sliced open Beast Boy's hand. He felt out of control – like the Puppetmaster was controlling him again – as he turned and walked away from the mess, past the still and staring Titans, and back out the hydraulic main room doors. All he could see in his mind's eye was his best friend sitting with his back turned to him. But it was all through a haze. He blindly walked back to his room before turning right back around and going to the elevator. Within minutes, he was outside, on his favorite spot on the rocks.
He hadn't been there for more than a minute when footsteps alerted him to a new presence. He knew who it was by her scent, and the way she walked; but he didn't want to see her right now. He felt ashamed of how he had acted. And she had seen everything! He really was an idiot. He jumped off of the rock, shifting into the shape of a dolphin before he hit the waves. But just as his snout touched the water, he was being pulled upwards again by something that gave him chills. Shit.
He found himself inside a bubble of black energy, face-to-face with an angry Raven.
Beast Boy morphed himself back into human form and grinned his "please-don't-be-mad-at-me" grin. It had never really worked for him, but he might as well give it a shot. "Hey, Raven! Uh… What's up?"
"What the hell are you doing, Beast Boy?" She let her energy go and let him fall to the ground. "Throwing some kind of tantrum at your best friend's going away party? Making everyone in the room feel awkward? Do you want to ruin Cyborg's goodbye to his friends? I can't believe that you would make this whole thing all about yourself rather than about him. Actually, wait, I can believe that, you selfish prick."
Beast Boy knew she was right, but his anger returned and ran away with him again. He stepped up to Raven and used all of his newly-gained height to tower over her, trying to intimidate her into backing down. "Fine, yeah, I'm selfish. I know that. I want people to be happy and close to me. What's wrong with that? At least I don't turn my back on my friends when they need me the most."
Raven's face was unhooded, and her eyes began flickering an odd shade of red. "What are you implying?"
"Nothing." Beast Boy crossed his arms and turned his back on her, looking out over the waves to Jump City.
An impossibly strong hand grabbed his shoulder and spun him around to face a Raven who was mostly unfamiliar to him – one with four glowing, red eyes, and hands surrounded by black energy. Darkness crackled like lightning around her chakra stone. "Who's turning their back now?" she taunted, her voice scratchy and demonic.
Chills ran up and down Beast Boy's spine, but he also felt a familiar clawing at the back of his subconscious. The Beast. If Raven wanted an intimidation challenge, he would intimidate her. Fine. He felt long-forgotten pains rack his body, and his mind started going blank. His head felt like it was inside of a blender. He couldn't even see Raven's reaction anymore.
Then a memory filled his mind. It was less than a memory even – just a few words that jammed themselves into the head-blender and wouldn't let it work anymore. "Knowing when to let it out…" He had remembered and lived by those words for years, and had never found occasion to let out the Beast. And now wasn't the time to unleash it. Not at all.
He began to fight back against the ravenous primal instincts that threatened to overwhelm him, slowly and mentally beating back the demons in his mind. He used every ounce of will earned from suffering and hardship to place the Beast back in its box. When he was finally able to focus on the world around him – the blinding sunlight, the too-hard rocks, the chill breeze – he saw Raven sitting calmly before him, hands on knees, meditating. He lay down on his back, heaving deep breaths in and out, letting the pains leave his body, and let her finish what she needed to do. He looked over every now and then to check on her progress.
After a small eternity, she opened her eyes. He caught her stare, and Raven spoke. "Feeling better?"
Beast Boy couldn't help but chuckle. "A little. You?"
"Great. I feel like I could run a marathon."
"Yeah, right, Rae. You couldn't run a marathon to save your life. You levitate too much on those circled-things of yours."
Raven respectfully paused for the place where laughter should be.
"Listen," Beast Boy said, "I shouldn't have done that. It wasn't the right time to unleash the Beast. I could've really hurt you this time."
Raven was silent.
"Well, I'm sorry, anyways."
"You have a lot to be sorry for. You're going to have to be more specific."
Beast Boy sighed, and began counting off on his fingers. "I'm sorry for almost turning into the Beast. I'm sorry for turning my back on you. I'm sorry for accusing you of turning your back on me." He looked over at Raven, using his best human version-kitty-cat eyes. "Do I have to keep going?"
The empath nodded.
"Fair enough. I'm sorry for storming out of the party. I'm sorry for smashing the plate. I'm sorry I didn't get Aqualad's number for you."
"Azar, Beast Boy, this isn't the time for jokes! Be serious. This is exactly why I said that you make everything about you. Because you do!"
Beast Boy sat up to face her. "I'm not making this about me. I'm trying to be funny. It's humor, Raven. Hu-mor. It's something that you should maybe look up in one of your books? It would make life a lot easier for you."
Raven facepalmed. "I know what humor is! And I appreciate a good sense of humor! But you – you use humor as a way to get attention, to get people to like you."
"Maybe I just like to make other people happy."
"I know that you do." Raven sighed, and switched to a different track of conversation. "But the point is, why the hell did you smash that plate?"
Beast Boy stared at his shoes and thought for a moment. "I was just angry. I couldn't control myself."
"Angry? At who?"
The first image to flash in his mind was of Raven leaving to go talk with Jinx, but he said, "At Cyborg, for leaving me out of playing video games. On his last day of being in the Tower."
"Okay. But I thought that you guys had your final gaming session yesterday. You made a cake for it and everything."
"I know, but… Why does he have to leave? Why do things have to change? Can't we keep playing Gamestation forever? I know it's stupid and impossible but I just wish it could happen."
"Famous last words before you're stuck in an immortal time loop where you never age and things never, ever, ever change until you realize that 'nothing changing' means you can never date any girls or make any new friends or go on any adventures ever for the rest of eternity." Raven smirked. "Does that sound fun?"
Beast Boy managed to laugh. "No, it sounds like crap. And I get it in my head – really. I know we need to change and grow and all that, but for real, why does it have to suck so bad?"
"Maybe it's all about perspective. I don't think Cyborg's incredibly torn up about joining the Justice League. He'll miss us, and we'll miss him, but he's doing something great with his life. Something he's always wanted. We don't exactly have to be happy about it, but we've got to support him."
Beast Boy's head turned ever-so-slightly to the side. "Wait. Are you telling me that you're not happy about him leaving, either?"
"No, you moron! I'm not happy about it! Cyborg is my family, and losing him is… difficult."
"Yeah. I'm going to miss fighting with him about meat. And playing video games with him. And pranking him."
"I'm going to miss fixing the T-Car with him. And talking with him. He has so much wisdom."
"Yeah, and he's just stupid enough to love hanging out with me." Beast Boy was surprised to see tears in Raven's eyes. He scooted over to where she was sitting. He was too afraid to touch her for some reason, but he rested his hand near hers. "I'm sorry. These past few months, I was so caught up in being sad myself that I didn't realize you were hurting, too."
Raven sniffled, but blinked away the tears that were threatening to spill onto her cheeks. "And I'm sorry for letting you be alone today. I knew it was going to be hard for you."
"Nah, I'm just an idiot. It's not your fault."
"Thanks, Beast Boy." He watched as her hand moved almost imperceptibly closer to his. "Oh, and stop apologizing already. Now it's getting annoying."
"Yo, B! Raven! I'm about to leave, and you two aren't even there to say good-bye! You guys are the worst friends in the history of friend-dom!" Cyborg was looming over them, seemingly out of nowhere. He grabbed them both up in a huge hug. "Sorry, Raven! I know you hate hugs, but the occasion calls for it! And I'm never going to see you again, so you can just take all of your anger out on Beast Boy, okay?"
"You got it," said Raven, who didn't seem to be all that upset by the hug.
Cyborg put them both down with a huge sigh. "I'm going to miss you guys."
"I'll miss you too, Cy," said Beast Boy. "And I'm sorry about earlier…"
"It's cool. I understand. But hey, you're going to call me at least once a week, right? And we can always play remote video games. Let me know when you're free, all right?"
"You got it."
"And Raven, take care of yourself, girl. And keep up with your car repair training. Maybe with my new salary, I can send you a car of your own to practice on! The Raven-mobile!"
"Oh, joy. I'll look forward to that."
Cyborg laughed. "I know you two are going to take care of each other. I'm not worried at all." He glanced at the built-in watch on his arm. "I've gotta move out now. I'm supposed to be at the headquarters at 4, and it's already pushing 12:30." The three made their way over to the front of the Tower, where the T-Car was parked, packed, and ready for the big move. Beast Boy smiled when he saw his present sitting in the front seat of the car, right next to Cyborg. He stood on the grass in between Raven and Argent and waved as the T-Car, Cyborg's arm frantically waving from the window, disappeared out of sight.
The crowd of Titans slowly dispersed until only Raven and Beast Boy were left. She reached over and lightly touched his arm. "Wanna go get ready for Game of Thrones?"
"I'd love nothing more it the world," he said. He turned his back on the place where his friend had gone, and faced the future.
A/N: Aqualad cameo? Check. BBRae tension? Check. The #1 brotp? Check. Ultra cheddar cheesy ending? Check. *mic drop* Thanks for reading - hope you enjoyed! :)