Author's Note: I do not own Twilight or any recognizable material. I do however play around a bit with the world. Please be warned that this is an AU and that a few details have been changed in the course of my story. Bella learned about the Volturi before Edward left and Jacob caught Bella before she jumped. Also, this is not a vegetarian Bella - so if your against that duck out now. As for those of you sticking around, please enjoy. Ciao.

"Great achievement is usually born of great sacrifice,
and is never the result of selfishness."
- Napoleon Hill

Chapter One:

I had never been much of a drinker; the few glasses of champagne on New Year's with Renee was about the extent of my experience with alcohol. Tonight, however, the amber colored whiskey in my small water glass burned my throat and the fire cleansed the guilt roiling in my stomach. I rocked the glass on the table in front of me, tearing my eyes off the ocher liquid that reminded me so much of the family I had once loved. Across the table, Billy Black and Quil Ateara Sr. were both silent and grimly drinking their own whiskey. Sue Clearwater was at the far end of the table, smoking a cigarette with an almost vacant expression on her pretty, round face. And Sam Uley was at the head of the table, drinking straight from the brown paper covered bottle – trying to drown his anguish.

I wished Jacob were here with me. I missed his comfort and his easy smiles, but most of all I missed his single-minded protective ferocity. He was out there right now, scouring the woods from here to Seattle with his pack brothers – trying desperately to track down the murderous nomad Victoria who had been a plague on the Pacific North-West for months. I wished desperately that Jacob would take me in his arms and shush me – tell me that he would protect me and that I'd believe it. Jacob had this indescribable way of making you believe everything would be okay. He was pure hope and joy and warmth – it was incredible how big and kind his heart was.

But he wasn't here. He couldn't tell me those things and the innocent optimism that made Jacob my own personal sun now seemed so childish and naïve. Nothing was alright and everyone sitting at Billy's table knew it. The council hadn't needed to summon me and they didn't need to liquor me up or even say the words. I knew already, how could I not? Charlie had stacks of missing person's files cluttering up the dining room table and even the news had started to report on an unusually high level of gang activity and the possibility of a serial killer. The vampires that the wolf pack had fought off – the ones Quil Jr. and Jared had given their lives fighting – were just the beginning.

Victoria was the serial killer in Seattle and it didn't matter how many the pack managed to kill because Victoria had millions of people at her disposal. I watched Sam's grim features harden and he reached for the whiskey bottle and took a long drink. The last week had been especially hard for him. With the onslaught of vampire activity two new kids had shifted; Brady and Collin – twelve and eleven respectively.

I drained my glass and, without a word, Sam filled it until it nearly reached the brim. I didn't argue – I only took another long gulp, trying to drown out the terror that threatened to push me into madness. It was unthinkable – two children being dragged into death and carnage. Tears welled in my eyes as Jacob's voice rambled on in my head – 'Collin can't stand the mated wolves, thinks all that kissing they think about is gross.'

Children – and that's what most of the pack was despite their arguments. I was older than all of them except for Sam and Paul – even Jacob had only just turned seventeen and hadn't even kissed a girl yet. These were my protectors – these children that thought themselves men because they could transform into wolves – and I loved them all. I loved their ferocity and their passion – I loved their goodness. The mere thought of their destruction on my behalf was enough to drive me mad. Eleven years old…

My throat cleared of the lump inside it noisily and the council looked to me. Even Sue, who had been staring out the back, sliding glass door looked to me with conflicted eyes. "I'm so sorry," I said in a hoarse croak. "I never meant for any of this to happen."

"We know Bella," Billy assured me with kind and sorrowful eyes.

"But it doesn't change the fact that I'm out there training children to fight monsters to protect you," Sam growled angrily with a clenched fist on the table.

I couldn't help but look down, ashamed and guilty. "She's just a girl, Sam," Sue growled right back. "What do you expect her to do? Walk into Seattle and offer herself up? Do you really think that the vampire will stop with her?" She snorted bitterly and took a long drag off her cigarette.

"Sue's right," Quil Senior said solemnly as he took a drink from his own glass which was filled with a clear liquor. "Maybe before – but too many lives have been lost. Too many for just one or two vampires feeding. The red head is turning victims – more than she is sending to us. Something must be done before the full force of whatever demon army she has made comes down upon us all."

I couldn't stop the quiet sob that broke me nearly in half. With a reproachful look from Billy, Sue slid her soft pack of Camel Lights to me. The taste was awful and Billy glared at me but my nerves did calm as I inhaled and exhaled with more control. My hands still shook but I tried to push away the guilt and self-loathing to a far corner and returned to the glass in my hand.

"Something has to be done," Sam sighed wearily after a few minutes. He leaned back in his chair and ran a hand through his short dark hair. "It's only a matter of time before either we all die or humans catch on to what's really happening."

Billy and Quil argued quietly but I couldn't make myself listen anymore. I couldn't take this helpless doom that clung to me – I despised the fact that my only hope was for Edward to return. That I was powerless without him. The thought made me near feral in rage and I felt the urge to claw at something – the wall, the table, my own face. Anything to alleviate the wrath that burned in my veins.

How could they? How dare the Cullens pretend to be so good and pious when all they left was destruction in their wake. Did they even care that the secret could be in jeopardy? Surely, they had heard at least something of the horrors in Seattle – most of the country had. Were they so unconcerned that they would let Victoria have her vengeance now that Edward was done with me? Was this the price of loving a vampire – death and betrayal?

Would I and everyone that I love die while the Cullens continued on without fear of retribution?

No. The idea blossomed in my mind like the most beautiful flower. I was not strong enough to stop Victoria or hurt the Cullens – but I knew of people who were. People who would care very much if they found out how close to the edge the secret balanced. The guardians of the immortal secret – the protectors – the Volturi.

"Stop," my voice was only a squeak and I looked up from the cheap ocher-colored whiskey. "Stop," I repeated more forcefully. Quil Sr. and Billy's hushed argument died and they looked to me. "I think I know of a way to stop Victoria." I left out the part of my own revenge against the Cullens and set my glass down on the table – sitting up straighter in the chair.

"You're not walking into the woods Bella," Billy commanded gruffly. "I'd never be able to look Charlie in the eye again."

"No," I assured him quickly, knowing he would like this next part even less than the idea of sacrificing myself to Victoria. "There are rules in the vampire world," I explained while trying to remember everything that Edward had told me. "Not many – but they all tie into each other for one purpose, prevent exposure. These laws are guarded by the Volturi – a vampire coven so powerful that they rule as uncontested leaders of the entire vampire race."

"So you what," Sue stubbed out her cigarette and reached for another, "want to give these vampire leaders a call? Ask them to save a bunch of humans they don't know or care about?"

Billy filled his glass out of Sam's bottle and sighed deeply into it. "Not exactly," I shook my head slightly and took a gulp of my own drink for strength. "I want to go to them and tell them of how the Cullens have broken the law and left the secret in danger. They will have to step in and stop Victoria because of the attention she's aroused."

Quil Senior's eyes were full of understanding as he looked at me. His mouth was set in a grim frown but I knew he understood what I wasn't saying. "What about you Bella?" He asked as Billy nodded in agreement.

"These vampires protect the law and you are walking proof of it being broken," Billy banged a fist against the arm of his wheelchair. "Do you really think that they will let you live?"

"No," I whispered quietly and then with more confidence than I actually felt I said, "I don't expect to walk out of the Volturi alive but I'm hoping that you of all people would understand, Chief Black."

No one said anything for a very long moment. Billy looked angry that I had thrown his responsibility in his face but it was necessary. My life was not worth that of the wolves, the tribe, or the people of Forks – and he knew it. It didn't matter how hurt his best friend of decades would be or what happened to me. Everyone at this table could see the end and knew we had no hope. We all knew the devastation that lurked on the horizon. Victoria would unleash her vampire army and we would all die.

But Billy's reluctance still shone in his eyes and I could feel my eyes watering at how much he cared. "Billy," I stopped and tried to contain the emotion in my voice. "You all have protected me for so long but it's time for me to protect you."

Billy reached out across the table to hold my hand and I smiled as I reveled in the warm calloused palm. "Charlie raised a good kid," he whispered roughly.

"Watch over him for me," I pleaded with a quivering lip. "Take care of him for me."

He nodded with tear filled eyes and leaned back, freeing my hand. "O-of course, y-you know us – thick as th-thieves."

I smiled and wiped away the tears on my cheeks with the back of my hand. "W-well," I stood up rather abruptly and tried fiercely not to sway as the room tilted slightly. The overwhelming panic of my impending death seemed to be tearing me apart from the inside and I didn't want to show the council exactly how terrified I was. "I best get home." I tried to smile through fresh tears but it felt broken and manic. "Tickets to buy, you know."

I turned to leave but Sam stood and grabbed my arm, "Let me drive you."

I nodded, trying not to show just how drunk I was. "Bella," Billy called from behind me and I turned to look over my shoulder. He didn't say anything else, he just stared at me sadly as my face crumpled. I nodded and turned back around, allowing Sam to guide me out to my truck.

The sharp, piercing cold wind tore through my thin clothes as I hobbled to the passenger's side and hopped in. I knew the heater wouldn't start to work until we were almost home and I lamented silently over the cold of Forks. What I wouldn't give to feel the heat of the Arizona sun one last time. To feel the blistering heat soak into my bones and warm my very soul. My forehead fell against the window as Sam turned the key and the engine roared to life. I'd have a nice long bath tonight, that was as close to the warmth of home as I was ever going to get.

Sam didn't speak as he pulled out of the drive and pulled onto the road. I watched the trees glide by with a new appreciation for them; they seemed more beautiful than usual. Their colors were richer and their appearance more haunting – the forest was mystical.

We passed the cliffs of La Push and I smiled softly to myself as I saw silver wolf jump off the side and shift mid-air. It was too dark to see more than a human-shaped figure but I knew Leah's wolf and I knew she liked to cool off after a hard run by jumping in the ocean. I noticed Sam watching too and smiled softly as I saw the love he still held for her etched into his own small smile. "I've always wanted to cliff jump," I said as Leah disappeared and Sam turned back to the road.

Sam snorted and gave me a wry look, "I didn't take you for a thrill seeker."

I laughed at him playfully and said, "I was about to jump once, but Jacob found me as I was admiring the view and told me about Harry."

"Well, you did run with vamps." I rolled my eyes at him and crossed my arms. He always said that whenever I managed to surprise him, like when I slapped Paul or yelled at him when he had gagged Jacob to keep him from talking to me.

But the small talk died too quickly and neither of us quite knew what to say. I looked back out of my window and watched the blur of the forest as we drove. The ride from La Push to Forks was a short one and in a town of only one stop light, it didn't take long to reach Charlie's. Neither of us had broken the silence when he pulled into Charlie's driveway and cut the engine.

Neither of us made a move to get out of the truck, finally, Sam turned to look at me. "I'm sorry for what happened with the Cullens and I'm sorry I couldn't protect you."

It was only then that I saw, truly saw, just how much this pained him. I almost cried as I looked at him, his calm mask shattered and the self-loathing in his eyes. "No – no Sam, you protected me for so long. I owe you everything – you gave me months of extra time to live. That is the most precious gift anyone could ever give another." My face crumpled and my lip quivered, "When you are counting hours, months are a miracle. You guys were my miracle."

Sam looked up at the ceiling of the truck and seemed to force himself to take a large breath and force his face into his normal neutrality. I bit my bottom lip and nodded as I blinked back tears, "Take care of Jacob for me. He won't understand this at first."

"Of course," Sam replied with a serious nod.

With that, I got out and made my way slowly to the porch. When I got to the door I turned around, Sam was gone and I breathed a sigh in relief. I sat down on the porch step and let myself cry with my forehead on my knees. I let myself get out all of my rage and all of my fear and I cried until my body could no longer produce any more tears. I mourned my ending life and the squandered months that Sam had given me. I had ruined them, wasted them away as shell – a living corpse. Pining away for the people who had thrown me away like yesterday's paper.

When my eyes ran dry I wiped my face and unlocked the door quietly. The living room was dark and Charlie was already upstairs asleep. He had been so enthusiastic about me going down to La Push that he hadn't even given me a curfew. But I guess at eighteen I was considered an adult now.

I could hear Billy from earlier as I made my way up to my room, "If you're old enough for vampires, you're old enough for Bourbon."