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Thanks for choosing to explore this story. It's unashamedly medical in places but I hope that lends it some authenticity
A special thanks to people who post reviews - your encouragement is wonderful and if I may say so, inspiring x
September 2016. Bernie has just left AAU at Mach speed after telling Serena she has accepted the secondment in Ukraine..
Bernie gripped the steering wheel. Christ. What was she thinking?.. Well. She had clearly ruined everything. No going back now. Serena was probably better off without Bernie Wolfe and her utter inability to express her emotions. Was it love…already….? Of course it was. Had Serena felt it too?…. Or maybe she was just caught up in a moment, faced with the prospect of separation? Not that there had been any time to find out. How had things dissolved so quickly – from being brave enough to suggest dinner at her place earlier today to bolting thousands of miles across Europe in the next 24 hours? Nice one Major Wolfe. Bloody perfect.
Beautiful, warm, fierce Serena. Could it have worked? No point thinking about that now. She glanced at the brochure for the Kiev City Hospital Trauma Centre, took a deep breath and drove home. The flat was finally looking like something resembling a home. She even had a stack of logs and kindling beside the woodburner – must get round to using it in winter. Thick rugs scattered across floorboards, a few framed photographs pinned onto on brick walls and wooden beams, mostly landscapes and temples taken by Cam on his travels in Burma. Seemed strange to think that Isaac lived in the same block. She wasn't sure she had the measure of Mr Mayfield just yet. Her thoughts turned to Dr Copeland - without realizing it she had really enjoyed having him around; on the wards and on the roof…it felt good to be honest in real time with at least one person at work.
The flat felt a bit cold. Why not test-drive that stove tonight? She struck a match and lit her carefully laid tapers. There was something soothing about watching the fire slowly roar to life. Mmmm. Must pack. Piles of clothes began to neatly tesserate into a large old rucksack. Yes…a suitcase with wheels would look more professional but she wasn't there to model travel accessories. What else? No doubt they would have everything she needed, but why not pack a couple of pairs of size 7.5 gloves and the blue stethoscope always went everywhere; sad but her neck felt bare without it.
A flash of recollection; Serena's adorable leopard print surgical caps, the way her stare intensified in theatre the moment she found the source of a bleed, the wordless questions she would ask Bernie mid procedure with a brief glance, wanting to know, needing to know they were going to get through it despite hideous odds and change a patient's life for the better. Ischaemic limbs, aneurysms, perforations, major haemhorrage; watching those dexterous hands perform miracles with torn and bleeding vessels…This has to stop. Now. Bernie reprimanded herself as she stuffed socks, scrubs (why?..), underwear, vests, shirts, trousers, jeans, toothbrush, mascara…
Kiev was a good idea. A chance for them both to recalibrate, for Serena to get this whole debacle out of her system if she wanted to. She started to compile a list to steady her thoughts - and her breathing... ; 1. Confirm with Hanssen that he found a decent locum; 2. E mail Dr Gregorian to confirm arrival time and ask him to send RTA and major haemorrhage protocol documents; make it clear not too much pen pushing and maximum theatre and teaching time; 3. Doctors accommodation or hotel? Worry about that one later, probably hotel; 4. might be good to visit the Kiev central military hospital, maybe they are already collaborating with….
The doorbell rang. Cam? She had told him to come round whenever he liked. He could stay in the flat if he wanted whilst she was away...She went to the intercom:
"Hello,….Cam is that you?..."
"Hello…?"
No response. He probably pressed the wrong button – typical. She buzzed him in and flicked the latch off the door. It would be good to see him before heading to Kiev tomorrow.
Except it wasn't Cam. Serena stood in the doorway, tentatively, but with her trademark resolute stare that made it absolutely clear there was nowhere to run. Not this time. She had a copy of the Kiev Trauma Centre brochure tucked under her arm and a bag that was crammed with ?what was it crammed with? … Bernie froze. She couldn't bear the idea of crossed words, had positively fled from the prospect earlier today but now there was no escape. Her heart felt like it had started to splinter into tiny fragments and they hadn't even exchanged a single word….