DISCLAIMER: I do not own SpongeBob or most of the characters in this story. They are property of Nickelodeon. I do, however, own a few minor characters, as well as having created names for some of the nameless.

This story is rated T for coarse language and references to religion and Satanism. You have been warned.

This is my first SpongeBob fanfic. I was inspired by a Youtube Poop where Squidward gets possessed by a bad lemon. I hope you like it!

THE ESTATE OF NIBIRU-MUL PRESENTS

UNDERSEA EXORCIST

CHAPTER 1: THE LEMON

It was a sunny day in Bikini Bottom. Everything was going fine for its undersea citizens.

We take a look at the Krusty Krab. Squidward is at the register, counting the money. SpongeBob is busy

"SpongeBob!" yelled Squidward. "Did you get those toilets cleaned?"

"Yes, Squidward," said SpongeBob, coming out of the bathroom.

"By the way," said Squidward, handing SpongeBob an order, "there's an order from a group of three."

SpongeBob looked at the order.

"Okay," said SpongeBob. "2 Krabby Patties, 2 orders of fries, 3 sodas, and 1 salad." He pronounced "salad" the weird way that he was accustomed to, as "suh-LAD" instead of "SAL-id". Naturally, Squidward thought this little gimmick was stupid.

"It's SAL-id, you loon!" said Squidward. "Not suh-LAD."

"But..." said SpongeBob. "I like suh-LADs."

"You idiot," said Squidward. "Just fetch these people their orders."

SpongeBob went into the kitchen. He prepared the Krabby Patties. Then he cooked the fries and filled up the soda. Finally, he made the salad. The salad consisted of lettuce, spinach, tomatoes, onions, and lemons.

"Order up!" said SpongeBob.

SpongeBob approached three fish - two girls and a guy. He gave one of the female fish a salad.

"Is this yours, Nancy?" asked SpongeBob.

"Why yes," said Nancy. "I'm on a diet. I've got to watch my girlish figure!"

Suddenly, Mr. Krabs came out of his office.

"It's time for your lunch break!" said Mr. Krabs. "You have 10 minutes!"

SpongeBob made himself a Krabby Patty to eat.

"Luckily," said Squidward, taking out a plastic bag. "I have a can of Swedish Barnacle Balls." Squidward looked in his bag. Unfortunately, the bag was empty. Squidward's bag had a hole in it. That meant that the can of Swedish Barnacle Balls must have fallen out and spilled all over the road.

Squidward looked at the bag and was shocked.

"Damn it!" said Squidward. "That's the last time I buy the cheap plastic bag. And I'm the only one who likes Swedish Barnacle Balls."

Cut to a scene of some wild snails eating barnacle balls that were splattered all over the street. The snails throw up.

"Oh well," said Squidward. "I'll just have a lemon."

Squidward went into the kitchen and took a lemon from the bag. He ate it up. Now something bad would happen.

When Squidward ate this particular lemon, he froze. He began to make weird faces, and started to turn creepy. Eventually, the transformation was complete. Squidward spoke up after his lunch.

"What?" asked Squidward.

SpongeBob, who had finished his Krabby Patty, walked out of the kitchen.

"Hey, Squidward," said SpongeBob.

Squidward laughed demonically.

"What in Satan's name are you doing here?" asked Squidward.

SpongeBob was confused. Squidward appeared to be infernal.

"Why are you talking about Satan?" asked SpongeBob.

"I am a disciple of Satan," said Squidward. "Feel my wrath." As Squidward spoke, the Krusty Krab grew darker. "I have the powers of evil! I can obliterate you all if I wanted to. This place is too holy, so I must use my Satanic powers to make it better. Hail the Dark Lord!"

Squidward zapped a table. It turned into a cauldron of blood.

"But," said SpongeBob, "what about your soul?" SpongeBob made an angelic face.

"Oh, please!" said Squidward. "I have no soul."

SpongeBob didn't know what to do, so he took out a Krabby Patty.

"Maybe this will do the trick," said SpongeBob, holding the Krabby Patty at Squidward's face.

Squidward hissed and vaporized the Krabby Patty with a zap.

"I can't eat any of that shit!" said Squidward. "It is a heart attack on a bun! My devilish powers don't need it."

Mr. Krabs looked at what was going on.

"SpongeBob! Squidward!" he said. "What in Neptune's name is going on here? Your break is supposed to be over, and..." Mr. Krabs saw the infernal Squidward - complete with the dark aura that had engulfed the Krusty Krab - and gasped. "What the...?"

"I don't bow to you anymore, Eugene Harold Krabs," said Squidward, "I only bow to the powers of the Dark Lord Satan!" Squidward began turning his head 360 degrees - just like the girl from The Exorcist.

"Mr. Squidward!" said Mr. Krabs. "I can't have you and your fiendish powers destroying the restaurant. I want you to go home and take a nice, long rest."

"Okay..." said Squidward.

Squidward rose up from the ground and started to float in the air. He then burst out of the Krusty Krab and was making his way towards Bikini Bottom.

"It looks like Squidward has been possessed," said SpongeBob. He looked at the lemon Squidward had mostly eaten. "By a bad lemon."

Dun dun dun! It looks like Squidward has crossed over to the dark side.