Would my mother have tried to change the future if she'd known what I would become?
I don't know my mother. I can't even remember her name.
But I know she would have erased my name from her heart had she seen this. Me. The monster she bore.
Maybe that's why I can't remember my own name. And why I hate the one I've been given.
The Winter Soldier.
Death.
I am Death.
I do not breathe—I am. I do not see—I obey. I do not hear—I act.
My existence is methodical. My purpose is veiled with blood.
Would she have given me away to put my life on a different course?
I cannot say if I have had these thoughts before, but today my mind is hers.
I lined the target up in my scope's crosshairs and wondered what she looked like.
I squeezed the trigger and hoped that she had forgotten me as I have forgotten her.
Please, God, don't let her see what I am now.
Is she dead? Did she love my father? Was she kind?
What is kindness? What is love?
I have been Death's closest friend for lifetimes. Maybe only since yesterday.
I do not doubt that my mother was good. I cannot believe that Evil begat Evil, and that is life. My soul has not yet been utterly consumed by Darkness, and somewhere within there must be Good. It must have come from her.
Save me.
Legends are remembered forever, but no one will remember me. The creature I am was perfected in darkness, and whatever light is left in me will be extinguished by darkness.
But there is no light left.
And I have no mother, no father. No wife, no children.
Heaven help me if somewhere in this cruel world is a child I left behind...
May he never be like me.
Thank you for reading! Please review! It seems no matter what I do, Bucky will not leave me alone, and I must write!