Disclaimer- not mine.
A/N – OK, so I found this on my computer, I think I started writing it around the time season 3 ended but then life just took over and I wasn't able to touch it since. Originally it was supposed to be the start of a longer fic about Alicia and Kalinda's epic love but since this new season depresses me greatly and I need some Kalicia plus it can sort of stand on its own I decided to post it. I may or may not continue this in the future depending on my time.
Alicia is at the stuff meeting, her eyes are fixed on Kalinda, trying to assess the other woman. She doesn't try to hide it, not even when Kalinda feels her eyes on her, and returns her stare, smiling lightly.
Alicia breaks their lock, sighs quietly. It has been a week, and though Kalinda hasn't exactly been distant, she has been professional. Not avoiding per se, but somehow busy with cases that don't include Alicia. Never downright rejecting Alicia's offers for drinks but always have something come up before she can get the words out.
Diane asks her about her current case, but as her mind is somewhat else occupied she isn't sure what's the question. She tries to think of what to say when Kalinda chimes in, "we in pretty good shape, we need another witness though. I'm working on that", she adds before Diane can say anything "I think the roommate is our best bet, I'm meeting with him afterwards".
"Good, now, Julois…", Diane keeps going but Alicia loses track again, she nods at Kalinda, expressing her gratitude, but Kalinda just waves her off, a small gesture of "don't mention it".
At least this hasn't changed, Kalinda still has her back, like she always had, like million times before. Without a word, she doesn't need to ask, Kalinda senses her distress and she Is there for her.
She should have known better, she should've expected this. Those kinds of things never end up the way you want. There's always the awkward unwanted tension. She thought that it will be different with Kalinda, that Kalinda is different. She still hopes so.
As the people pile out of the room, she puts her hand on Kalinda's arm, stopping her. Kalinda flinches at the touch, Alicia removes her hand, tries to hide her hurt, to tell herself it's nothing personal, nothing to do with her, it's just Kalinda.
"Are we okay?", she asks.
Kalinda smiles at her, it's one of her genuine smiles, Alicia can tell, but there is an edge to it, something indecipherable.
"Yeah, why wouldn't we be?" and she's on her way.
Why indeed.
They at a bar, their bar, a new one. They're on their second round of drinks when Alicia suddenly says, "remember that whole 'one night, no repercussions' thing?"
Kalinda nods, looks at her expectantly, doesn't get where this is going.
"I think I should try it".
Now kalinda looks baffled, she recovers quickly though and asks "with Will? But I thought…"
Alicia shakes her head, "not with Will", but she doesn't elaborate.
"Oh, who then?"
Kalinda plays with her glass, Alicia thinks that this may very well be the first time she mange to surprise her.
Alicia downs her drinks, gathers up courage, she takes a deep breath and says "You".
Kalinda stops, her glass halfway to her mouth, it takes her only a second before she resumes her movements, but Alicia notices. She doesn't say anything, but she doesn't walk away either.
It may be stupid, Alicia knows it is unreasonable at best, but she can't help herself. Ever since Kalinda told her about her history with agent Dealenny, she couldn't stop thinking about it, she wanted to know what Kalinda thinks about her. So, one night she asks her if she finds her attractive, truth be told, she wanted an ego boost, after the dry spell she was having. Kalinda just smirked and assured her she is very attractive woman.
It is the same dry spell that prompts this conversion. When she asked Kalinda what she thinks of her it wasn't on her mind, but then she thought about it and it didn't seem like a bad idea. Kalinda is gorgeous, and she obviously knows what she is doing. She was the one that came with that whole one night thing (and true, it was about her, but Alicia didn't see any reason it shouldn't apply to Kalinda as well), and she had done such things, she said so herself.
Besides, it wasn't like between her job and the kids she had her share of opportunities to meet someone, and it has been a long time.
If someone has told her 5 years ago she will do such a thing, even think about it, she would have laugh. Hell, she would've laughed if it was one year ago. The fact that Kalinda is a woman aside; she just isn't the 'one night' type. Or she wasn't. but now, after everything she's been through it doesn't seem so out of character for her anymore. She wants this, and the fact that Kalinda is a woman only serves to excite her more.
Kalinda still doesn't answer, and Alicia starts to doubt herself, but then she hears.
"I don't think it's a good idea", Kalinda is looking straight ahead while saying this.
Alicia won't give up so easily "Why?"
Now she does looks at her, Kalinda's eyes penetrating, searching. She raises one brow, as if to say 'do I really have to name all the reasons why this is bad?", but Alicia doesn't budge.
"Why?", she repeats.
And Alicia know why, she knows there are a million reasons at least why they shouldn't do it, she just doesn't care.
Kalinda sighs, looks at the corner and then at Alicia again, "We work together".
"That didn't bothered you when you told me that before", she counters.
"and tomorrow?"
"Tomorrow we wake up,", she uses Kalinda's words against her, "and I leave".
Kalinda wants to protests, but Alicia beats her to it "I want this, Kalinda", she whispers.
Kalinda shakes her head but turns around to grab her coat, "let's go".
Alicia can't hide the little smile that tags at the corner of her lips.