Summary: Dean finds out something shocking about Sam…and his own feelings.

Spoilers: Set in the episode Born Under a Bad Sign

Warnings: Wincest. Rated M for language and, although not overly graphic, sexual content.

The Real Me

Chapter 1

Dean closed his eyes so he wouldn't have to see the fury in his brother's face as the fist pounded at his own so hard he could feel his teeth rattle. He knew it wasn't Sam but it sure did look like him.

"Just get it over with you freak!" Dean spat as he tasted the blood which trickled into his mouth. He'd survived many ruthless beatings in his life but whatever this demon had in mind he knew it wasn't going to be pleasant.

"Where would be the fun in that?" Sam's mouth twitched as the demon tried to force a laugh in the recently acquired body but only managed a twisted sneer as he stood over Dean and gloated. Escaping from the restraints had been so easy and now all thoughts turned to retribution.

"Tell you what Dean...how about I let Sam…Sammy… out for a bit so he can see what I'm…he's...doing to you. Would you like that?"

"Go to hell!"

"Ah well been there, done that, with the thought of this day keeping me going until I could crawl out of that place. It's been fun up to now but things haven't turned out quite how I'd hoped," Dean felt another blow, "and what, I wonder, would it take for you to kill your brother? You could say that I'm a bit disappointed."

"Yeah well get over it…life's a bitch!" Dean replied through gritted teeth as he felt Sam's hand land on his injured shoulder and slowly started squeezing. He instinctively grabbed it as the pressure increased.

"And then you die…" The demon smirked as he ignored Dean's desperate grip around his wrist. "Sooner for you now though. Pity because you're a fine looking hunter that's for sure. I thought that I'd like to get to know you better when I had you tied up in that warehouse. But that was before I took a swan dive out of the window. It kinda pisses a girl off you know."

Dean eyes shot open in surprise.

"Meg?"

That was something he wasn't expecting.

"Well not any more. I now have this fine body of Sam's to enjoy or for you to enjoy, if we had the time, but you've lost your chance. Anyhow, not looking your best now are you? What a pity, but Sam doesn't seem to mind. He's desperate for you to fuck him, the filthy boy."

Dean's eyes widened and his mouth hung open in shock. He definitely wasn't expecting that either.

"You didn't know? Well, well, well. Big brother doesn't know about the dirty thoughts little brother has about him."

"You're lying, you demonic son of a....whore."

Meg happily continued. "Well...on this occasion…no. Tell me Dean...you mean to say you've never noticed the way he looks at you? I'm really surprised. I'd have thought you'd have caught on long ago with his soulful puppy eyes looking longingly into yours, wanting you, aching for you. Poor Sam, maybe I'll let him have a peek at his own hands beating the life out of you."

"You certainly haven't changed have you? You were a bitch then and... well... would you believe it? You're still a bitch." Dean retorted as he stared into the cold evil eyes.

Meg brushed the trickle of blood running from Dean's nose, delighted that she was inflicting some obvious damage, and slowly ran the wet finger around her lips. "Mmmm…tasty." She grinned, her eyes rolling in satisfaction and laughing at the disgust crossing Dean's face. She punched him again but this time he hardly felt the knuckles cracking on his cheekbones.

He was regretting not taking more of the pills that Jo had given him earlier because although his face had become almost numb, his shoulder was a different story. It felt burning hot where earlier the bullet had torn into his flesh and now even the slightest movement produced the most excruciating pain. Pain which made his head reel. Was this evil bastard toying with him or telling him the truth? He wasn't sure of anything anymore.

Past memories came flooding back. He remembered how horny he'd felt when he'd caught Sam fresh out of the shower wrapped only in a towel, his body glistening and his hair dripping wet. It had taken him by surprise that his breath had caught in his throat as Sam moved slowly towards him. He'd wanted to totally lose himself in that body. To touch and taste his skin, be more than a brother. He put that down to the fact they'd been on the road for weeks and he'd not gotten laid in what seemed like forever. Then there were all the times they'd fought and ended up not speaking for days. He'd so wanted to make things right by sliding in bed beside him and have Sam fall asleep in his arms. That was something he couldn't explain to himself so tucked away those thoughts in a part of his mind marked awkward. There they remained until now.

Moments earlier he'd resigned himself to his fate. He knew that death at the hands of some hell hound or other would come sooner or later. But no way did he want to die now, not knowing if this could be true.

A new desperate need to survive ran though him and he considered his options. His heart sank to see Bobby still slumped and unconscious on the other side of the room. He was on his own. He still had one good arm and summoning what little strength he did have, threw a well aimed punch. On another day, in another place it would have easily found its mark but not this time. His fist, which could normally topple the toughest guy in the room, was easily caught by Meg who gleefully crushed it slowly while forcing it back over Dean's head.

Dean cringed as she came in closer, so close he could feel her breath on his face. He tried to put all thoughts of Sam out of his head. "It isn't Sammy, it's that bitch" he repeated over and over but couldn't stop shuddering with pleasure on feeling Sam's lips trailing down his neck and teeth nibbling at his throat.

"I know want he wants Dean." The unmistakable voice of Sam whispered and he desperately tried to block it out.

"He's spent so many nights watching you sleep as you lie on your bed; checking out your cute ass in those black boxers. He's convinced you're doing that on purpose…tempting him, teasing him. I can feel the sensations it gives him just thinking about how he wants to slowly pull that t-shirt over your head and see your sleepy smile as his hands roam all over you. Then there's that cheeky grin he longs to see when you ruffle his hair as his lips caress every muscle of that fine toned torso of yours. Lips that linger at every scar and bruise as his gentle fingers tips finally slip into those boxers and check out that hard erection."

Dean groaned as his head fell forward, angry at himself for feeling overwhelmed

with his cravings for Sam. He hoped the ground would open up and swallow him or more likely send him into the flaming Pit.

"You still with me Dean?" Meg queried as she squeezed his shoulder again. "I wouldn't want you to miss anything."

Argh!" Dean cried as his whole body convulsed at the new wave of pain which shot through him. The wound began seeping blood again and soaking into his shirt. Meg pulled back a little to revel in her victim's additional misery.

"Good …glad you're awake…….Oh where was I? Ah yes…there isn't time to give away all his dirty little secrets but we both know that he has one sexy mouth on him and wants to use it to more than just pout with." She put her fingers to her lips "Well this mouth and these lips…. which are mine now." She gloated and smiled as she licked them.

"I have to say that it's a pleasure looking inside your brother's head…quite the imagination. A little treasure trove of love, pain and guilt and let's not forget desire…because in his wildest dreams he has you crying and writhing as his lips and tongue do the most dirty things you could imagine. It's enough to make even a demon like me blush."

Meg moved in closer again, her nose almost touching Dean's, as her hand pushed his head back hard. "And as he drives you to ecstasy dearest Dean I can hear you whisper Sam...Sam...Sammy before you finally gasp and moan as he drinks you down."

Meg grinned at the tightly shut eyes which were now unsuccessfully fighting back the tears.

"Aaw, well that's so sweet." She sneered. "Not a totally one sided attraction is it? How can I resist letting you two have a final moment."

Meg ran her hand gently over Dean's cheek as she leaned forward and kissed him hard. His head swam with conflicted feelings of love and revulsion. He tried desperately to pull away but was trapped against the wall and the ever pressing lips. Sam's lips. Lips that felt so good. He could feel the tongue teasing his mouth open and searching inside. For one sweet moment all thoughts of hell, demons and pain were gone. As least if he died now he would die happy. He didn't for one minute believe the demon would give them one last moment together but he opened his eyes a crack and watched as the hellish blackness of his tormenter's eyes were replaced by the familiar, if somewhat surprised, eyes of his brother.

"Dean!" Sam blurted in amazement. "What...what's going on?"

"It's okay Sammy...I'll get you out of this," Dean's voice cracked, "we haven't much time…there's a demon inside you…fight it!"

As soon as the words had left his lips, the blackness flickered across Sam's eyes again. Dean felt despair as the contorted face of the demon returned.

"Well that's not very nice is it? I give you a chance to make nice with your brother…to say your farewells… and you say that. I think it's time Dean." Meg swung her hand back and formed a tight fist; a look of pure evil now dancing in her demonic eyes. Before she could make a move her fist was caught and gripped by Bobby as he pressed a red hot iron on her arm, breaking the demon's binding link. Sam screamed; his head jerking back as an enormous cloud of black smoke poured from his mouth and escaped into the fireplace. He slumped to the floor disorientated and bewildered as he focussed on Dean's bruised and bloody face.

"Did I miss anything?" Sam asked and was shocked as Dean replied with a punch to his face.

---

Dean and Sam listened to the reassuring purr of the Impala as they stared ahead at the open road. All they could see were the headlights cutting through the darkness but somehow it felt reassuring. Safe even. They were glad to be leaving Bobby's place behind; it had been one hell of a day and one hell of a week. Dean glanced over at Sam as he began studying the charm that Bobby had given him; and although he felt like crap he was definitely feeling good about seeing his brother more like his old self.

"Hey, you okay?" He asked, not sure how much he would remember. Sam didn't answer.

"Sam? You in there?" Dean joked but could tell that something was bothering him and hoped it wasn't what he thought it might be. He knew what his brother was like when he got an idea firmly stuck in his head. A right pain in the ass.

"Dean." Sam said as he tucked the charm in his pocket.

Dean gave Sam a cautious glance. He didn't reply.

"I can remember some of it but what exactly happened back there?" Sam queried, his focus now totally fixed on his brother.

Dean twitched a non committal eyebrow. He suddenly became a little nervous.

"You know...when you were....," Sam hesitated, "....kissing me."

Dean winced. "What can I say? It was that bitch Meg, she was in you and had the hots for me….end of story." He replied and glanced over to see Sam giving him a stony glare. "Don't look at me like that." He said trying to stifle the rising panic that was bubbling to the surface. This was something he really didn't want to face.

"Like what?" Sam asked.

"Like you don't believe me."

"What if it hadn't been Meg?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You know...if it had been me."

Dean rolled his eyes. "You sure you're okay?"

"No, I'm serious...if it had been me kissing you." Sam insisted.

"I think that the demon's affected your head."

"I saw something in your eyes Dean. Something I've wanted to see for a long time."

"We're not having this conversation." Dean said as he pushed his foot hard to the floor. The engine roared with satisfaction but for once he couldn't appreciate the power under the hood. This was one occasion when it wasn't going to help him escape.

"Dude…you and me...we could die any day, any time, any how...and there's something I need to know. Stop the car so we can talk." Sam urged. He wasn't about to let this opportunity slip away.

"No way." Dean replied and his knuckles turned white as he gripped the steering wheel, his eyes now glued to the road ahead. Sam was on a mission and Dean knew that the mission was him.

"Yes way!" Sam yelled and grabbed the steering wheel and turned the car towards an up and coming side road. The Impala rattled and shook as its wheels bumped over the grass and stony verge, narrowly avoiding a tree. One of its low hanging branches hit the windscreen with a loud smack.

"You're fucking crazy." Dean yelled as he fought to control the car. He jammed his foot on the brake and, with the tyres squealing and flinging up dirt, the Impala eventually came to a standstill. The headlights flickered and went out plunging them into near darkness.

"Yeah I probably am," Sam replied with a serious glint in his eye. He leaned over and grasped Dean's startled face in his hands, "but I need to know," he whispered as his lips found Dean's. His kiss was hungry and desperate. When he finally broke away he'd half expected a punch to the face and was relieved when none came. Dean's eyes remained closed, his mouth slightly open and his lips wet and pink.

The silence was deafening as Sam waited nervously. This was the moment of truth. He tried to calm his breathing but it didn't help having Dean's lips delicately lit by the soft moonlight as it filtered through the trees. They looked even more inviting.

Dean's eyes slowly opened and searched his brother's face. Even in the half light he could see the anticipation and love in those brown eyes. He couldn't fight his feelings any longer and didn't want to.

"Oh Sammy." he said with a sigh as he brushed his hand across Sam's cheek. "You're such a drama queen," and with a little smirk, his mouth was on Sam's and he kissed him again and again, only stopping to draw breath when his lungs were bursting.

"Does that answer your question?" He gasped as he finally pulled back to watch the smile beginning to spread across Sam's face. "This doesn't mean we're a couple you know." Dean quickly added as he felt eager fingers undoing his belt buckle. His own hands had already taken care of Sam's.

"I don't care what it means...how far's the next motel?" Sam panted he felt Dean's hand slide on to his bare ass.

"Who needs a motel when we have everything we need here." Dean said with a smirk as he glanced over to the back seat and back to Sam's eager eyes. "You, me and my baby. Everything I could ever want. It'll be like a threesome."

"Jerk."

"Bitch."

---

TBC