Chapter 1

How she didn't want to let go. How she wished she could turn around and run back to him. But Susan Pevensie knew she couldn't return to her king, her Caspian. The only man who, in her lifetime as queen of Narnia, held only pure and humble love for her in his heart.

No other man would ever be as good as Caspian, she mused. No other man would look as good as him. The contours of his face; his body were permanently burned into her brain.

The strong, tanned, muscular, capable body. The tanned skin and dark brown hair. The deep alluring accent and the deep-brown, almost black eyes that drew her deeper and deeper.

So as she stepped through the portal back to England, she lifted her head once more and looked him squarely in the eye. Her eyes relayed her silent message, and it was received as Caspian dipped his head and broke their connection. Tears blurred in his eyes; tears that Susan didn't see.

The men and women gathered watched in fascination as the great King Caspian X crumbled before their very eyes. Steel determination entered his gaze as his head snapped up once more. As the portal began to close he cried out.

"I will find you, Susan! No matter where you are, I will find you!" and the mighty king sank to his knees.

"I. Will. Find you." He breathed, as tears overtook his eyes once more and took him into a pit of oblivion as the separation from his beloved Susan finally set in. The dread of the situation settled on him. Never again would he hear his name roll from her sweet tongue, never again would he be able to look into her silver-blue eyes that sparkled with silent wit and life. Never again would he be able to touch her milky-pale, pure body.

How could Aslan want an ending such as this? It wasn't fair. Aslan believed in righteousness, in justice. This wasn't just! It wasn't just at all.

Caspian rose silently, and found the square still full of people, looking at him. He brushed his tears away with his sleeve and allowed himself to take on a more regal, dominant appearance.

"Those who wish to redeem themselves will gather here. Aslan will take you to your new life, a good life. Allow your spirits to be healed, purified. Rest safe in the knowledge that you will one day return. For now, I am finished. Aslan will stay. That is all." He said, letting his eyes wander over the crowd of broken and lost Telmarines.

He wondered how many would stay, and how many would leave. But at that moment, they were the least of his concern. Caspian nodded his thanks to Aslan, and left the courtyard. He quickly found Destrier, and climbed him.

"To the palace." He whispered in the horse's ear. Destrier took off at a fast gallop, sensing his master's urgency to be gone. They quickly arrived, and Caspian took Destrier to the stables, and then left to his room.

He walked through the lighter corridors, taking notice of how the banishment of Miraz had affected the appearance of the place. It was lighter, as the corridors were adorned in rich red and gold tapestries.

Caspian arrived in his room. It had large windows giving him sweeping views of the woods, and a glimpse of the Narnian Sea. In the room stood a large, mahogany four-poster bed with a crimson red bed-spread and lighter red pillows strewn around the deeper mahogany headboard. On the opposite side of the bed stood an elaborate wardrobe, holding all of his clothes. Through a door on the right side of the bed was his bathroom, with rich marble floors and silver taps.

Caspian took off his sword belt and threw it, landing haphazardly on a chair beside his wardrobe. He fell back onto the bed and curled up, clenching his teeth together as he tried not to cry out loud. Pain ripped through his body as his other half was taken away from him.

Why hadn't he done anything to stop her? Why hadn't he spoken out? Called to her? Gritting his teeth, he got up and ran through the castle, needing to get away from his room and his thoughts. He ran out to the forest, and walked until his feet ached. He lay down on a patch of moss without any second thought and allowed sleep to take his physically and mentally exhausted body.

Susan had heard him, his last words. 'I will find you', he had told her. And how she hoped he would. But deep down, she knew he couldn't. Her world and his world were realms apart. He could travel through time itself and still not find her.

She allowed herself to hold on to that little spark of hope. She held on to the hand-rail as the train she and her siblings were on sped through the countryside. She looked down and locked eyes with her little sister.

"Do you miss him?" Lucy asked gently. Susan closed her eyes. She missed him already. Her heart hurt, spearing physical pain through her body at being separated from its other half.

"Yes, Lu. I think I do. Do you?" Susan replied, giving her a gentle smile and then taking her eyes from Lucy's. She couldn't let her little sister see that deep hurt, pain and anguish that lay beyond her eyes. She had to steel herself. She had to pass through this.., this...Phase. This passing phase, she told herself. Yet her heart knew that it was everything but. Lucy leant against her older sister's frame.

"I don't know why, but I think everything will be alight, Su. I can feel it." the younger Pevensie said wisely. Peter and Edmund joined them in the hug, sending their sister their sympathies. The train thundered on.

Aslan came to Caspian in his dream, basking in his golden glow of radiance. He only said five words. "I will bring her back."

I thought of this little fic after reading some truly inspirational ones by Maddie-Babz and . I'm a Suspian shipper through and through, and I wanted to have a go at writing and exploring their unique relationship. So I came up with this multi-chap story. It'll be six chapters or more, depending on how long I want to make it... I really hope you guys like this! As for Maddie-babz and . I hope I do you guys credit!

Summary: Caspain and Susan are in pain. Physical, unadulterated, unprohibited pain. Their hearts seek each other, and though realms apart, will find a way back to each other. Surely Aslan didn't want a fate as cruel as this!

Disclaimer: I don't own Narnia.