A/N: Yes. Another attempt at writing.
Disclaimer: I do not in any way (though it would be cool) own Fairy Tail. Nor do I in any way own their characters.
This fic is about Juvia, the POV is Juvia's. Though there are hints of Gruvia and you don't even need to squint.
Drip-drip-drop
The rain silently pours on the city of Magnolia with a silent hum of sadness as rain is usually depicted as. Walking on the streets of Magnolia was none other than the Rain Woman herself, Juvia, with her long wavy blueblueblue hair sticking to her face as the downpour continued on with her continuing to walk under the rain.
'Rain, rain, rain.' The bluenette thinks bitterly to herself, 'That's all Juvia brings. Rain.'
As much as she would hate to face it, her dear Gray-sama rejected her again. Though it wasn't new, it still hurt her even though she thinks that sometimes herself is to blame, for coming on too strong.
Drip-drip-drop
Juvia is water. Juvia feels it when she's about to cry and more than half the time, controls it for no one to see. Tears are water. Juvia is water.
Her being water could also be a reason on how she manages to flood the guild with an over-excessive amount of tears every time Gray-sama goes on a dangerous mission and is yet to come back. Thanks to that over-expressiveness, you may ask 'why does she need to control her tears when she does, literally, flood the guild with her tears?' Simple. She didn't want others to see her cry-cry. She would much rather have them consider her tears as a comedic sign anyways.
She was water. That was why she was fine with them thinking of her as shallow.
Juvia feels it when she's about to cry and like any other time, she still controls them as to not let them trickle down her face. She didn't need another reminder of rain.
Instead, she lets the rain do the crying for her.
Drip-drip-drop
As she walks down the streets of Magnolia, unaware of where she was headed, she knows that she doesn't hear her own footsteps. She hears the gentle pitter-patter song of the rain.
Her footsteps were supposed to be easy to hear, seeing as she was the only one braving to walk down the streets in this rain. The other people were probably in their homes, warming up, spending time together, and laughing while letting the sound of rain fade into the background.
'How does it feel like to have a family?' Juvia looks around and her eyes spot on a house with evident laughter leaking out a lets a small sad smile slip unto her face. 'Juvia doesn't know. Nor will she ever know.'
Don't get her wrong, there was many she considered as her family and they always smiled a lot, laughed a lot, ate a lot and fought a lot. But she can't help the wistful wish of having experienced her very own, her own family to have greeted her back then. Heaven knows how much she envied those who had even just someone as family.
A family to have comforted her childish fears of thunderstorms even if she was and still is an Ame-onna, it would have been nice to know that someone would be there for her. Or her own family waiting at their home instead of an empty house.
They always told her home is where the heart is, that home was always warm, welcoming. She thinks she found the warm, welcoming aspect in her friends but found the heart aspect in a certain ice-mage.
Drip-drip-drop
When asked if she was fine, she would reply that she was. She knew that everyone in her guild had problems, much more important that her actual ones were. So she smiles and let the common knowledge of getting Gray-sama to accept her feelings as her problem. They didn't need another person to worry about when everyone else worried about other people. She didn't need to add in on that list.
As an elemental mage, Juvia is strong.
She was strong in her element and was knowledgeable about it too. Juvia could stand on her own, they knew that. So she would prefer if it stayed at that.
She was water, rain, liquid. She was fine with them thinking that her unrequited love was her only problem. Water was after all, in a way, like an illusion.
Drip-drip-drop
Sticking her hand out under the rain, she lets it gather on her palm. When she deemed the amount enough, using her magic, she let the small puddle compress together until successfully creating an orb of crystal clear water.
Under the rain, it does seem useless. Being a water mage, it does seem useless.
But being the sad, lonely girl she was at the moment, it wasn't useless. Not really.
She stares into the crystal clear orb of water because in a way, it was her tears. The tears she hadn't even bothered to let out. The tears she wasn't brave enough to show.
"Gray-sama!" The bluenette yells from across the guild, energetically making her way to where the male stripper sat by the bar."You have to come with Juvia to a mission!" She states because she knows if she even had the decency to ask, he would reject her once more. Not that stating it does any better but at least it dwindles the chances of that happening even by a .0001%.
"I don't want to Juvia, just ask flame-brain or metal-head." He says uninterested.
"But Juvia wants to go on this mission with Gray-sama only!" She whines much to the ice mage's annoyance and the rest of the audience's amusement.
"Look Juvia, I'm just not in the mood to do a mission. I just got back from one." He tries to reason out but she won't take no for answer.
"Then when will Gray-sama be 'in the mood' to do a mission? Juvia will wait." She persistently tries to convince the young man in front of her. He wasn't even looking in her direction but instead kept his eyes at his drink.
"I don't think I will ever be in the mood to do another mission. Not in a while anyways."
"Then Juvia will wait." She pushes her cause though inside she was already sulking in a corner, crying about how he never really gave her the time of day but on the outside, she kept a determined persona, unfazed by his blatant rejection. "Juvia doesn't care how long."
"Ah, but Juvia you would need to pay the rent at the end of the week for the dorm." Erza buts in, uninterested in anything but her cake, "So you really need to get a mission now." And true to her image, the weapon mage cut her hopes down with razor sharp clarity.
"Gray-sama really doesn't want to go with Juvia?" She dejectedly says but a second later, bounces back before the former even replied, "Fine! Juvia will go on this mission alone then! And when she comes back, she'll prove to Gray-sama that she is strong! Then he'll go on a mission with her!"
Not even giving him another chance to reply, she makes her way to the mission board, selects a random mission with a good reward, goes to the kind barkeep, Mirajane, and runs out of the guild before anyone could stop her.
She doesn't know why but she continues to run, run, run and run.
Juvia knows that she shouldn't feel sad.
She shouldn't feel broken.
But when she saw the way Gray-sama seemed to care more about the other guild members than her, she knew that maybe she wasn't even as important as them. Sure, she was a guild member and all but maybe she shouldn't push her luck anymore. Maybe she shouldn't.
She was water and he was ice.
Though magic-wise, compatible but love-wise, maybe she shouldn't hope to melt his heart because it'll only end up freezing hers.
She shouldn't feel sad but that doesn't mean she isn't.
She shouldn't feel broken but that doesn't mean she is everything but.
She shouldn't push her luck but that doesn't mean she could.
She shouldn't hope... but that doesn't mean she wouldn't.
"Juvia... Juvia only wanted to please Gray-sama." The woman in front of him said with her face blank of any emotion.
"I know but next time, please don't ever do that." He turns to walk the other way, his back facing hers, failing to see the heartbroken expression she wore that day.
That day, it rained.
In a way, Juvia was a bit happy to see people support her in getting her Gray-sama's attention.
Would it be mean and heartless if she also said that she was a bit happy that someone , in the name of Lyon Vastia, regarded her as a beauty? That someone like him actually liked her?
Was it bad that in a split second, she wondered what might have happened if she did accept his love?
Was it bad that she wanted to feel what it was to be wanted? Loved?
In the end, Juvia still knows the fresh pain heartbreak leaves at its wake. She should know of course, though she may not show it, her heart broke every time he rejects her. She knows it all too well.
She still doesn't cry though, she would prefer not to ever have to show them her honest tears, letting the rain wash away all the pain for her.
In that aspect, she was thankful to kami for letting her be a Rain Woman.
Drip-drip-drop
Juvia was no stranger to how it felt to be alone.
And she knows how much it hurts, how much it kills you slowly inside.
It leaves you wondering 'why?'
She knows that even if she finally did have people to call her family, she still felt alone.
Alone in the cruel, cruel mad world.
She knows what it is and she knows that in the guild she wasn't the only one who did. Though everyone was smiling, she knows that like her, they were all broken in a way that was so far beyond repair. She knows that Gray knows the feeling all too well too, no matter how many times he and Natsu fought, there was a part of him that yearned company.
Misery loves company.
Juvia knows the depths of being alone for she lived more than half of her life being alone. And Juvia also knows that it always haunts you to be alone.
So even though it hurts her to be rejected, she knows one reason why she would continue to push on even if it may annoy him.
Since she knows what it is to feel left behind, alone and scared, she'll do anything she can to make sure that even in a tiny way, he knows that he wasn't alone. That he knows that she was there for him, through thick and thin, she'll stay by his side.
Her voices in her head never fail to call her selfish though. Tells her every time that she stays by his side so that it would be her that doesn't feel alone.
Though she chooses not to mind it, in a way, she knows the voices were right.
Drip
Juvia is a water mage, quite a brilliant one if she does say so herself.
drip
As she is seemingly crystal-clear, most can mistake her to be shallow.
drop
But some do know, it is all an illusion.
So there she stood in the midst of a rainfall, looking up at the sky with her eyes closed, letting the raindrops trail her face as they drip down her cheeks. She lets out a tiny self-depreciating smile because out of all the years being a rain woman, she knew that rain water was supposed to be cold. Not warm.
'Pathetic.' She thinks as she feels the warm liquid seep through her closed eyelids and down her face as she just lets the rain wash it away, along with her worries and the pain of yesterday, today and tomorrow. 'I'm quite pathetic.'
Rain, rain, go away.
Come again another day,
little children want to play,
Rain, rain, go away.
"Gray-sama!" The blue haired woman screams as she runs through the guild, making her way to fawn over her beloved.
She resumes the love-struck look she always adapts around him, the never-ending praises flowing out from her mouth, the fangirl-ish stalker-ish persona she knows. She smiles and smiles and smiles as if she wasn't crying yesterday.
Because in the end, even though it hurts, he'll never know.
He can't ever know.
And she would prefer it would stay that way.
Fin!
Haha, okay I know this wasn't really well written so I'll appreciate any flames sent to me.
Or reviews if I can get any.
I wrote this because I believe that there is more to Juvia's character even though I'm not sure I really portrayed it clearly here.
But oh well, at least I tried?
THANK YOU FOR TAKING THE TIME TO READ THIS.
Ciao!