This is the exact reason why I hate tall buildings. Too risky. But I have always wanted to go to New York City just to experience what it would be like for like…a day or… an hour xD Big cities make me feel small. But, it would be a great place to open up a pancake shop somewhere: D lol yeeeeah…. Probably not.

*Disclaimer crap here*

))))))

Matthew stared down at the city below him, watching cars, well, more like cabs and mopeds move slowly down the busy streets of New York City. Watching the large sidewalks, filled shoulder to shoulder with people, hurrying along, hoping to not be late to wherever they are heading, not even realizing they were being pickpocketed, not realizing their child was taken, not realizing that just minutes from now, there would be a body, falling to the ground and hit where they were walking. Sure, he may cause some inconvenience, there would be police, and caution tape around where he landed, but people would just go around, stare and wonder why before quickly forgetting and going on with the rest of their lives.

He swung his legs a little as they dangled over the edge of the building. The cool fall wind whipping his long blond hair around his face, the clouds were darkening and by the shape of the clouds, it looked like a thunderstorm. Matthew never really liked thunderstorms, they kind of scared him. He usually ran inside and hid in a room with no windows and put some headphones in, blasting it up all the way, even if it hurt his ears. If he didn't do this now, and the storm came before he jumped, he may chicken out and run back inside.

Or maybe, he wouldn't be scared at all, maybe he would welcome it, maybe the thunder would help him push himself off the edge, or the lightning might strike him, even if people have survived a hit before. He looked back down and saw people walking faster as they noticed the threat of rain. Some people who had thought ahead were opening their umbrellas; he pouted a bit, well, there was a hindrance. If he jumped, and landed on someone with an umbrella it would ruin the whole thing. The people wouldn't be able to move out of the way in time because the umbrella would block their view and he would land on them. Breaking is life ending fall and possibly killing the person he landed on.

Moving a strand of hair that got caught in his mouth, Matthew looked around at the other buildings. Maybe he should have chosen a higher building. The one he was on now had eighteen floors and from the top he could see the school he taught at just a few miles down. He didn't even like his job, having to deal with teenagers who didn't give a crap about history, or him for that matter. He couldn't keep control of the class half the time, that's one of the reasons he was here.

School hadn't even been let out yet; he has just thrown the board marker down and stormed out of the room, leaving the class room eerily silent. Even if he didn't go through with the jumping, he would most likely just go back just to be yelled at by the principal or get fired. Matthew snorted, that would be his luck. He propped his chin on the palm of his hand as he looked out into the city, Gilbert was probably working right now; probably sitting in one of these buildings, editing papers and books for some popular author. Matthew wondered for a moment if Gilbert was maybe working in the one he was sitting on top of, he thought for a moment. When he ran out of the school he didn't pay too much attention on what building he ended up on.

Matthew mentally waved it off, nah, Gilbert was most likely in some other building, maybe one not so tall, or maybe it was taller. Whatever it was, it wasn't too likely his lover was in the one he was sitting on. Matthew smiled, ah, yes, Gilbert. He had been with him for quite some time now, their relationship was rocky at times, like every normal couples was, but all in all it was good. Though, Matthew had to wonder why Gilbert even chose to be with him. He was nothing special, Matthew had many flaws and sometimes it got in the way but most of the time he made sure he worked on those flaws.

Matthew sighed and watched the air come out in a small puff then evaporate away into nothing. He did this a few more times, before looking back down. Once he jumped, he wouldn't have to worry about stress anymore, no more worrying about how he should act, what he should or shouldn't like, what he should say or shouldn't say, what he should do or shouldn't do… he leaned his head back and looked up at the sky, the clouds looked they were turning a more greyish tint than the darker clouds he saw only a few minutes ago. Maybe it was going to snow, Matthew loved snow, and he loved the coldness and the texture of the snow. He shivered; yeah, it might snow.

He wanted to move up far north as possible; he had been to Canada a few times during the winter season and loved it. It was beautiful and when Niagara Falls would freeze a bit, it looked just as gorgeous as when the never ending water flowed freely down the sides. He smiled; maybe that's what he should have done, gone down the side in an air tight barrel down the sides, at least would have went down in style; Matthew giggled.

Looking back up at the sky he leaned back a bit, hands holding tightly onto the ledge, his face looking almost apathetic, uncaring. Maybe he would just put this off another day, he would go back to his job, get yelled at, or fired and go do some lame ass job till he found another teaching job somewhere else; he sighed and sat up. That sure sounded like more hell than what he wanted to deal with right now. Scooting a little closer to the edge he looked down, and he spotted an opening, no umbrellas. If he jumped now, his dissent would take no more than ten seconds before his fatal hit to the ground.

Gripping the ledge till he felt the concrete bite into his hands, he finally pushed and shoved himself off. It was like he froze for a moment before falling quickly to the ground, watching the ground grow closer every second, then he swore he had the worlds quickest flash backs.

"Hahaha, Gil!" Matthew yelled and gigged as Gilbert smeared, well tried to smear maple syrup all over his lovers face.

"You know you want it! You drink this stuff right? Well I'll just give you a maple bath!" Gilbert laughed loudly as Matthew failed miserably at trying to stop Gilbert. Of course, Gilbert was too strong and easily pulled Matthew's arms down and wiped it all over his face. Finally, Gilbert stopped and watched at Matthew pouted but then licked his lips and smiled. Gilbert leaned in and gave Matthew a quick kiss before snickering. Matthew stared over at Gilbert and deadpanned, seeing he took some of the syrup with him. "Gil…" Matthew smiled, "That's so unattractive." He teased before taking both of their empty plates and disposing them in the sink.

ooo

"Well that's what you said!" Gilbert rolled his eyes and leaned against the table, arms crossed.

"Yeah, obviously you don't know how to take a joke." Matthew retorted.

"We were talking about some pretty serious shit and you decided to joke?" Gilbert sighed out, "Really?" He asked his voice one of disbelief.

"I was trying to lighten the mood, I'm sorry I tried!" Matthew shouted and walked away, throwing his hands up into the air. Gilbert followed,

"Hey, don't just walked away, are you going to just leave this hanging? You don't want to resolve it?"

Matthew turned around to face him, "Gilbert, you're the one who started sprouting shit in the first place and I don't know where it came from! Saying I'm 'distant' and 'not putting effort' and all this other stuff, and you bring crap up on the worst day I mean….Really?" Matthew turned, grabbed his coat and went to open the door but Gilbert put his hand on it.

"We're going to resolve it. Now."

ooo

Matthew and Gilbert walked down the aisles of Wal-Mart, well, Matthew was walking, pushing the cart and Gilbert was busy intently looking for the goldfish crackers in the snack aisle. Matthew gave an amused smirked as Gilbert desperately looked for the crackers that obviously weren't there.

"- how could they just be out of all of them, birdie? All the different types, gone!" Gilbert whispered like it was the end of the world. Matthew just smiled,

"I don't know, love. They may have more tomorrow, we can just pick up some more tomorrow. For now, let's go get some tea." Gilbert pouted and then went to go find the tea.

"OH MY GOD THAT KID HAS THE LAST GOLDFISH BOX!"

- Then, little things went by faster –

"I can prove I love you more." Matthew challenged.
"I doubt it." Matthew leans in and gives him a kiss. Matthew and Gilbert stare at each other. Matthew wanted to keel over, God that was awkward. The break up later at Alfred's house. Getting back together with Gilbert a year later.

Gilbert blushed, Matthew blushed. Gilbert scooted closer, "I'm gonna kiss you."

"Can you believe it, Gil? We're graduating college!"
"You better believe it, birdie!"

Gilbert getting sprayed with silly string on his birthday, Matthew published his first and only book, Gil
Getting his job at the school, Surprise birthday party for Gilbert, When Matthew published his first – and only – book, he was so excited, Gilberts first job editor interview, Celebrating that he got into one of the top editing companies, big fights, little fights, Christmas when he surprised by giving Gilbert one of his favorite type of dogs, going to school to deal with annoying teenager who didn't want to learn. Going on dates with Gil, anniversaries, going to Canada, going to Germany, running home from school in the rain because the car broke down, again. Gilbert laughing and smiling, cuddling up to him.

Matthew blinked out of his flashback a few seconds after he started falling. The wind whipping his hair into his face, his clothes billowing as the wind went around it, flapping widely as he fell faster and faster to the ground, the pavement was now coming fast in would be seconds now, he closed his eyes and whispered, "I'm sorry." A millisecond of unimaginable pain exploded through his body as he hit the pavement.

))))))))))

Review, please? *pouts* It would be much appreciated.

Going out with a bang, not really, but gosh falling and not regretting it would be hard dont cha thing?
(There's no way I could jump, don't worry ;D)

Yeah so some of this stuff actually happened, like the first fight but I stretched it a lot cause I needed it to be more dramatic and less stupid than it really was xD plus I needed to keep a lot of it in character, plus I wouldn't actually ever write a whole real argument. They are never really that interesting, especially this one xD but I'm not getting into that.

Well I haven't graduated college yet and my 'Gilbert' hasn't graduated high school yet so yeah, most of everything below this is my crap imagination. I suck at flashbacks don't I? I also couldn't think of what my 'Gilbert' called me any nicknames. I'm pretty sure they don't, so I used the universal term 'Birdie' as lame as that is. I used 'love' cause its what I call them all the time :] It sounds more like an England thing, but I like using it :D Its my way in nicknames of showing affection.