Hi! I'm FishyGuruKat and welcome to the premire of . . . The Sy- Artemis! WHAT DO YOU WANT! I'm introducing my story to everyone! YOU'RE COMPLETELY RUINING MY CHANCES OF HAVING A GOOD FIRST IMPRESSION!!!!

Artemis- I wanna go to Sesame Street on Ice.

Me- NO SESAME STREET ON ICE!

Artemis- But Elmo and Cookie Monster and Zoe and Big Bird and Ernie and B-

Me- NO SESAME STREET ON ICE!

Artemis- But they skate!

Me- NO . . . SESAME . . . STREET . . . ON . . . ICE! Do you understand my point? NOW GO TO YOUR ROOM!

Artemis- But FishyGuruKat!

Me- NOW!

Artemis- FINE THEN! I will go to my room and weep because I can't possibly watch Sesame Street on Ice.

Me- *sigh* This is exactly what happens when you take boy geniuses and inject them with who-knows-what.

Artemis was thinking about Holly. Since he couldn't go to Sesame Street on Ice, he might as well direct his genius to something.

He thought about her hair. It was so . . .pretty. And red. He wanted hair like that. Artemis looked at his raven black hair in the mirror unhappily. He needed adjustments.

He called Holly from his ring and asked her to come over as soon as possible. Of course, Artemis tried to wait as calmly as possible. He couldn't wait for the makeover!

At first, Artemis tried thinking about princesses. But, there was a problem. Princesses reminded him of makeup. And that reminded him about the makeover. Artemis decided that thinking about princesses wasn't working.

He tried thinking about Elmo. Elmo was red, like Holly's hair. In fact, Elmo was Artemis's favoritest character ever! He really liked Elmo.

Before Artemis knew it, Holly was there, tapping her foot impatiently.

"Artemis? What in the world are you doing?"

Artemis looked startled and said, "Thinking about Elmo."

"Now I know you're kidding. Artemis, the boy genius, thinking about Elmo?"

But Artemis just looked up at her with innocent eyes and said "I wanted to go to Sesame Street on Ice, but FishyGuruKat wouldn't let me. And where do you get your hair done? It's so . . . red. Like a tomato. I want hair like that."

Holly looked astonished and said, "Artemis? Are you off your rocker? Since when do you think about Sesame Street on Ice? And my hair? Which, by the way gets done at Dodo's."

Artemis was happy. Surreally happy.

He wanted to go to Dodo's. He wanted Holly's red hair. Really badly. Artemis stared up at Holly with puppy eyes and politely asked her to take him to Dodo's and get his hair done.

Holly agreed, but reluctantly. As they flew to Dodo's Artemis felt confused. Why was Holly agreeing so reluctantly? Was she just afraid that he'd steal her hairstyle?

Artemis pushed the thought out of his mind and thought about the Super Why theme song instead. He liked Super Why. Especially Princess Pea. She was so cute! And pink. Artemis really liked pink.

Artemis- I like pink.

Me- I know, Arty.

Artemis- I like Elmo.

Me- He's not pink.

Artemis- Close enough. I like Sesame Street on Ice.

Me- No, Arty. I thought this was over with.

Artemis- SESAME STREET IN ICE!

Me- Actually, it's Sesame Street On Ice, and now . . . GO TO YOUR ROOM.

Artemis- But Blues Clues is on!

Me- I don't care! YOU MUST GO TO YOUR ROOM. NOW.

Artemis- Fine, I will go into my room and complain to the police that you are being prejudice against blue dogs.

Me- Please do not try this at home, readers. You have seen what syringes of terror can do to children. They go from geniuses . . . to Sesame Street crazed lunatics. AND I AM NOT BEING PREJUDICE AGAINST BLUE DOGS!